An ancient octopus in sunken cave
Ate hollow bread, and prophecies he gave.
For me he said, 'you will be undone,
For I am the inescapable sun,'

His beard aglow, 'in darkness shown and bred,
Some thousand creeping maggots in your head
Dare grace that swollen doorknob of your mind,
Just greet each one,' then hid his face from mine.

"But please! Once more. Such grace on me bestow,
And say again what horrors I will show."
He ate, and spoke, 'the world will wilt and die,
But luck! - the sun's forever rays will fry

Till broken bugs be stone at last,
And turned the world to sand and glass.'

cardboard  city

As i sit in my shelter watching the drops of rain
i sometimes  find it hard to contain
my anger and fear
at being alone and trapped here
i watch the people as they walk by
taking their greatest care not to catch my eye
their guilt is no suprise
you would think people would have to care
but no they just stare
i am not sure who or what they see there
not a person , just a thing
throw it a penny and it may dance and sing
like a performing bear, nobody cares
not even about the bears
a bear needs people to care about it
i need people to care
i am not a peice of ****
to be wiped off thier shoes
nor is the bear a prisoner
and should not be kept in a zoo

each day i look in the bins, for food i can eat
for clothes on my back, shoes on my feet
its strange what people throw away
i guess i did it myself
when i had somewhere to stay
with people that loved me, people that cared
parents and siblings , with whom i shared
happyness , dry tears , shallow felt fears
a hug , a kiss, things i miss
companionship, love, friendship not hate
not being alone scared and afraid

oh sad world , where do i belong
i live inside my head, where others tag along
darkness , shadows, everything forlorn
hopeless , cruel , cold and unkind
i live in the pit , that i call my mind

happyness. sadness, two sides of my mood
two sides of my face, one nasty , one good
one angel , one devil, one dedus, one don
one body, one funtion, to die after being born

oh mother , oh father, what should i do
what happened to the love, from both of you
i seem ever alone, far from the crowd
i just want to scream help me ,  aloud
as i sit in my shelter, watching , waiting
feeling, lost, hungry, tired, alone
afraid, thinking of home
contemplating

death

A Question of Numbers

In one year we travel four billion miles around the Sun
Without even stirring a limb.
We dream fifteen thousand dreams,
Remembering almost none,
How significant those that we do.

In a lifetime we may see nine hundred New Moons
Twenty-five thousand Sunsets,
Twenty-five thousand Dawns.
How many do we really see?
How significant those that we do.

How many times might my love smile at me?
How many times will we kiss?
How many dreams can we make come true
Before time flees and is gone?
How significant those that we do.

If I thought I'd be gone tomorrow
What would I say and do?
Nothing significant.

The light comes and goes across the earth;
A clock hand that sweeps us away.

Butterflies, unaware

I look forward to you looking forward to me, bringing out the best in me. The best comes to those who wait, so, repeat after me, and do exactly what you see, and it will *** to be; eventually. Cause you coming after me, is our destiny. Giving you a helping-hand like you are right next to me. The right-click; my tongue flick, your upper-lip, licked. Hitting your ****, until your lips split; you'll flip, when I flip the switch, feeling so devilish, touching you made me selfish, feeling you made it; worth it. My frame of mind is picture perfect; my plan is to hurt it, your level of pleasure my verdict. The sounds; your screams, your moans; I heard it.

if i focus on numbers the passion it fades. focus on lines and the colors turn gray. how do i balance? i want back my vision! the surge of creative that grants me my wisdom. if i focus on dates, on filling a schedule: i don't smell the flowers or notice their yellow. i don't cry so easy, my shell becomes tougher. i react much quicker, i act like my mother. i think green. i think thin. i clench my fists YOU CAN'T COME IN. i don't want to feel. why do i choose artificial//real?

feelings

feel so cold, nothing seems real
feel like i used to feel
when the wheels in my head
stopped going forward
went backwards instead
so many things in my head
that shouldnt be there
shouldnt be anywhere

mabye inside the mind
of some poor ******* that couldnt find
his way through life
clawing, knawing, at his own bones
all the while thinking of home
mind wandering
like mine does all the time
quoting some line
from a film or a song

convincing yourself
thers some hidden meaning in it
for why your life died
and went so badly wrong
and turned to ****

feel so lonely, if only
someone could take my pain away
pain visited me such a long time ago
and stayed
feel lost, feel the cold frost of life
sending a chill down my spine
feel numb
feel like i want to strike out
at anyone and anything
feel like my body isnt even mine

stare past my window
far far away, eyes stray
eyes discuise, the person behind the mask

eyes lie
mask wears me like a second skin
mask hides the people that are within
my head
today my mask will be; don, dedus, donna
mabye someone else instead
feel frightened
feel like i just want to be held
in the arms of someone
that can keep me safe
keep me out of my own hell
thats in my confused mind

feel like my barbedwire thoughts
are so kind, feel blind
unable to see even me
feel like i wasnt conceived
unable to believe i even exist

in this manifestation
cold invitation
of an existance , that is my life
feel like i want my wife, to sort out my life

feel like i cant feel
feel like i want to strip the skin from my bones
feel like i want to go home
feel cold, so very cold, feel old
feel alone