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I see we've finished, though barely started yet
Apparently your motto is
Keep it short and sweat
Written by Diana Garcia*
Our eyes never met
Our hands never touched
Synchronized were our hearts
To learn I needed so much
I wish to kiss
I wish to hold
My only regret
Is being so cold
As you grew so did my fear.
A memory turned nightmare
I never got to make my peace
Would it be different if I took the time to say goodbye
What is a mother who commits the ultimate crime, who didnt even try?
What is a mother who is always scared?
What is a mother who wasnt prepared?
Its all been said and done
I chose to run
We'll put you under so you dont feel the thunder.*
I felt every strike.
My recollection is a blur
Muffled voices
That blinding light
Picking and probing then suddenly, a bite..
Helpless and afraid
Why does it suddenly feel
Like I’ve made a horrible mistake
I was afraid

I'll carry you with me
Like a mother should
The back of my mind is where you reside
Not as a secret
As my reason
Not an excuse
Youre my lesson
A better understanding
A different point of view
New found strength
Through your death
I was born anew
You were not in vain..
All my goodness
Comes from you
Our eyes never met
Our hands never touched
Synchronized were our hearts
Little did I know you would teach me so much..
In the works, coming back to spell check. This is very raw
She's in between
what I want
what I hate
and what
I never
had
Broken hearts can only mend
when they stop trying to fit into someone else's second-hand love
Sharks can't swim backwards,
they can only move forward.
But forward is a circle
and they'll never know.

We buried you in cherry
under the juniper tree,
and with God as my enemy,
God isn't there.
I tried to write a song after my baby brother died, but to no avail. The drought continues. I've been doing a lot of reckoning with my spirituality since then.
Depicting a beauty ethereal
I’ve become your sun
In the morning
And the moon
Of your night
I’ve caught you
Spellbound
And hypnotized
By every lie
Knotted in every line.
You reach for me
Clinging to the caress
Of the cadence
I have penned
The unspoken depths
Reeling blissfully
Among this fabricated fancy
Finally, I’ve caught you
Yet not before long
I too am enthralled
Longing for your trusting gaze.
Maybe it's been written
somewhere in the constitution
     of the waning moon

                                         ― When somebody loves you,
                                               you can never be lonely ―

But, appearances
  to the contrary,
the moon is sometimes blue;

counting stars alone
in a sky full of stars

is just about as lonely
as 'once in a blue moon'
                              can be ―

Like when the night is yours alone
                  or feeling alone
               in a crowded room

hearing Hank Williams moan within your silence
       "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry"

                                         ― When it's hard to say
                                               you love someone,..
                                               but it's harder to say
                                               when you don't ―

                • • •

A coyote's pleading howl
breaks the silent twilight engulfing trance
cast by the dappled moonlight;
like there's some kind of lonely madness
    swallowing him whole,..

                     as
    these two hollow eyes
                 gaze out through
                                     the chilly,
                                            sobering
                                                 refreshed
                                                   Autumn air
                                                             ­    spilling
                                                                ­  in through
                                                            the open window,

                                                        ­           counting stars ― alone
                                                           ­             in a sky full of stars


                                                       ­             the crackle of the fireplace
                                                       ­            echoes, startling the silence
                                                         ­                of a feigned warmth
                                                                ­          from the other side
                                                                ­ of an otherwise hollow room

and i feel frayed as a hole in an empty pocket with nothing left to lose

the impending dark winter nights are lonesome
            and  linger longer than before ...
  
seeing the empty space beside me
   I remember how it really really aches to just be ...

                                                            *­lonesome as a blue moon ― *

                   ✩                        ✩                                       ­ 
                ✩                                       ✩                           
✩          ­                                                      ✩
         ­                                                                 ­                                

moonless ― rivers ... 2017


Lonesome as a Blue Moon
Written by:  h.a. rivers
We're like the ocean and space
Two different entities that from afar, gaze
Two entities admired for our greatness
Elements of unknown and mysteries are what we possess
Our deep rooted issues are always hidden secrets
And you love in waves but I love with distance
And we love each other despite our incoherence
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