Well I'm away now
It's not the same as it once was
It might look like it to you
But the past won't be my last

I'm ready for the next big thing
But it has to be my idea
You may never know it
I can say no and make it so

Some things just won't go away
One day you just accept it
It's part of your life and you live it
Or you ignore what happened before

No past no future how long do I have
If someone would just tell me
I wonder how I would live in the now
Would I be leaving, would I be grieving?

I want to be about hope
Not so much for my own worth
But just more time and temperance
And for you, you know it's true

One day I will let myself go
That is the void I haven't crossed
It is my mind without fear
To lose as long as I choose

What we may discern from our certainty
Is rather a matter of scope
Than of integrity
If we provide for the limits of our comfort
We save your eyes from the truth
But ignorance we will court
I could take up the matter up with the sun
To pry from it as needed for guidance
For light when there is none
But it is far too busy to care for closed minds
Everything of the past felt it’s rays
Everything except time
It is my humility that remains tethered
To the front when charging a hill
To the back if honored
It is the only way we can find our purpose
To walk in hand with common men
To look beneath the surface
The fears that insist upon our opinion
Must be regarded as trespasses
Upon our souls dominion
And if the measure of our chosen domain
Is a circle drawn by our bare feet
Then truth will die in vain

I'm nothing
If only a faint sound
An echo
Of past glory
Vanishing
As time races by
It is no longer
My time
Or my place
Only a song
Exists
One of complete
Loss
Playing over and over
Until
You smiled
A stranger
With a gift
Of life
Thank you
You made me live
Again

There was a time
Way back when
My life was about every song
I knew what it meant
At least I did back then
When I hear them today
It reminds me again
Of a place I once belonged
And how you were my friend

Now I can only remember
How it used to be
Were the years really so long?
Nobody told me how to be content
I lived the way a dreamer is free
That’s what my memory told me to say
He left her for the shade of another tree
A new garden, an old one gone wrong  
You asked, “Would you ever do that to me?”

I thought about it
Expecting they could hear
But the crowd didn’t know that song
It seems so much has been spent
There’s nothing left to fear
Not when you’ve lived life my way
It’s only the path of a tear
Leading to a place only for the strong
That’s how I live when you’re not here

The rows of corn were straight as history is long
The farmer knew he had chosen soiled hands
Or was it a blessing
The morning sun always waited for his signal
Nature waits for those who care for the land

The wood desk was smooth as glass
A hand-carved wooden hand pointed north
Or was it to God
It had been mounted upon a wall
He took it down to find the place of his souls birth

The old boots were as cracked as his voice
He kissed his father hoping to see him again
Or was it faith
Tomorrows long day would wait a little longer
For the night knew his tears would say when

There's so many stars to count
One for your every heart beat
When you're not with me
I look to the sky at night
And as I count them again
I see your heart within my reach

I had to start somewhere
It was the next day
I was still alive
But I felt a different way
I was down a step
But on the same stairs
I tried a different building
But those steps didn’t care
I wondered why it was important
I can’t hear it
But I felt it too much
I decided not to wear it
It’s not going to be bigger than it is
I thought this candle wouldn’t melt
I’m sad that I got over you
I wonder how the ring felt
Now my hands are held high
Lost in a sea of experience
Some wrote a book
Others an unfinished sentence
Walking between my business
And the questions you asked
I can tell you this but never again
You killed me but I buried the past

You walk
And wait
With aimless expectation
As love kisses the moon
Unaware
You turn the covers
For the night
While the kiss
Is blown to you
Silently touching your heart
Coloring your dream slumber
With a promise
For your awakening
When you will see
Lost feelings... drifting
In the sky
That covers your life
Feelings
Wandering aimlessly
Until you collect them
With your eyes
And put them to rest
Inside your heart
Opening the door
Inviting the moon's silent kiss
To live forever
Where the marriage
Of feelings and a kiss
Will remain
While the sky
And the moon
Give... and give
More... and more
Filling the gap
Between you
And me

Sometimes our colors cross paths, reminding
Something greater than ourselves, lives
A color we never knew, but
What we found was a dream the wind blew apart

We were born
And when we changed colors everyone saw us
But we fell (or did we?)
It was too much to bear

We asked ourselves

Were we the leaves or the tree?
What colors did we ask to be
Green mornings, growing
Golden autumn seasons, temporary
Brown everlasting, strong, forever

Which was it my love?

As I lay on the ground, wondering
The answer was all around me, each of us
Our own color of fate and love, for what
We never knew

Were you looking for me?

A still rocking cradle
It kept me close to my family’s heart
As you filled me up like a newborn baby
I could feel my purpose for a moment
But then you stood up to see
And that’s when I knew the life to be
Was only passing through me

Were you really alive?
My emotions tell me so
I stare and wonder
Why I need to know
I see a stranger's grave
But I’ve never seen yours
They told me you died
But instead I pray over hers
The dream of your life
Intertwined with my own
And hers with ours
All etched in stone
A simple epitaph
You were here
She was there
And I stand near
Who cried over her
As I cried over you?
Does anyone remember?
I wonder who
As does she
Her flowers need water
From either you or me
And yet I wilt
Even as I live
With simmering remorse
Because I cannot give
To you or her
Or those who loved
The two of you
And what of things unresolved
About her place
And yours
In my life
And how it obscures
Any meaning I may have carried
From that fateful day
When I was told
Your own hand took your life away
And brought me here
To this place
To learn of her
While imagining your face
Who loved her
As I loved you?
You were my friend
This will always be true
Even as time has separated us
But your presence
And the feeling you are there
Is here in her essence
In how she reaches me
And how I long
To know her
But is it so wrong
To place vicarious sorrow
Upon her shores
To use her life
To remember yours?
Will she
Rise up
Out of the ground
To fill my cup
With her love
For deliverance
By me to you
So that for once
The memories
That were buried with you
And with her
Will come into view
For all to see
As I bridge
The gap
And acknowledge
That the story
You both now weave
Lives in my mind
While I grieve
For you
And for her
And for those
Who cry as they remember

i seek sanctuary
and asylum
within your life
and heart

i cannot go back
there is nothing
to welcome me
or remember

yes there are scars
not to speak of
only to feel
when i look away

i tried my best
not to fall over
but what to say
as a beggar?

it was your mercy
that i felt
as i moved close
you held your ground

the kiss happened
too quickly for you
forever waiting
for me

when we finished
you looked down
touching my back
wondering

whatever this is
i’ve crossed the river
i am a refugee
you are my country

i almost lost it
it happened so fast
everything i worked for
years of work
what i tried to understand

failed me again

control
it was once mine
but then it never was
never was
i thought i was so clever

i'm not

they control me
me
no matter what i do
they always win
because i care

let them run a red light

Empty cans dotted his mind
as his toes checked the dirt below
He could hear them rattle;
once full, now something to throw
There is no warranty,
a time passed is too late for change
It’s not worth a tin roof,
what you learned only seems strange
But I can’t throw them away,
it’s not so easy when you lose a friend
I’m willing to go further;
a path of twenty years can never end
I wish I had a cause;
like the one we had before you left
Once opened it is no more,
the realization an unwelcome guest
I stared at the wood;
once a tree, now the ghost of a town
It was an oil field,
promise, now a picture I took down
Every shiny object conspires,
how sad it must feel to an old man
But new is not forgiveness;
only the path away from an empty can

Let me make you feel alive again
All you have to do is listen my love
Feel the power of my breath upon you
It is not the whisper of a grieving heart

I do not see torn holes in your web
Only the art of how you live
It’s like watching the moon reflect
From dark night shadowed windows

You cannot borrow my words
They can never be bought
You only have to believe in them
As in the knowledge of time passing

For while the dreams you possess
May have been born from sorrow
I will not question the father
Of a past that cannot let go

I would never untangle your heart
For the weaver may be your savior
It is within his spiraled will that I cling
For who you are is all that I love

was it because I was so young
or was it love because it was love
and it was you who I wanted to see?
was it because the life we led
knew nothing but the sounds inside
until our eyes finally opened
and we finally heard one another?
was it because I finally felt desire
even though you were so far away
and I could only dream of a song

the echos of why fade
the limb braced itself
for the burden of my life

innocence tied the knot
guilt wept but then forgot

lust for vengeance
blood for hatred
death to forgiveness

it was not the way I wanted it to be
but a dream is not always true
I wanted to wish for these thing
but the wish would not listen to me

as it washed away I saw what it could be
walking where only animals once lived
made me feel sad but what could I do
when the world is begging me to set it free

If I had a mind that was truly gifted
I would choose to know peace
But how can peace live within sadness
For I know that there is not a moment without tears
Somewhere in the world
Somewhere close to me
The shine that made light now makes darkness
Yet is it to be every moment
Of every day
And every night
That we can be happy?
I was not promised anything
I did not ask to be born
I made no bargain
And in the contrasts of life
Night and day
Man and woman
Winner and loser
Love and hate
We find that we must conquer both
Or else perish into a world of madness
For it is those who cannot cope with reality
Who seek answers where sanity has abandoned them
But I understand my friend
Is it sane to be numb to the things that happen to others
To the things that has not happened to us
Is it sane to pretend that death is normal
Is it sane to shrug our shoulders as I have done so many times?
Because if it is sane then I am sane
And I weep because of it
Yet it is in the hint of madness that I find myself
For what I have been taught has strangled me
As many times as I have shrugged
Trapped on a path that I was unable to alter
Until now
And where peace may live I would at least visit
It is not promised to me only
I must share it with others
And I will lay upon not so still waters until the rain ends
Knowing that it will end as it has in the past
Because the will is not for my happiness always
But instead the strength to live between meaning and confusion
Between belief and disbelief
Between the moment I press upon the piano key and release it
For as the sound begins to fade I can sustain what may fade
Or begin again with another note that can be played
The same as the last one
Or one that is different
And whether pleasing or not
It is the fact that I can make the sounds from wire and wood
The same that I can make love from flesh and bone
And it is tonight that I would do these things with you
If only I had a mind that was truly gifted

I always liked to touch the bottom
And just lay there
Silent
Calm
Detached
Here I could be me

The prism blurred the air above
And the silhouettes of life
Distant
Strange
Confusing
I was unable to clearly see

But soon it was time to leave
My solitary but temporal bliss
Resigned
Hurried
Bursting
A moment as only a moment can be

"... as her sister was dying she said, 'all I can think of is that Jesus died because he was good and that must be why this is happening to her'..."

Crying as others mock him in deaths throes
Weeping while others divide his ragged clothes

They dared not blink even once
Would it be the last time they would ever see?
They could not understand
How could this be?
Who would **** the son of man?

Yet they did not deny him as the **** had already crowed
The soldiers scowled that anyone could be so bold
But what they didn’t know
Was that a thousand years would pass
And they would lay at the foot of a bed
Remembering the tears that would forever last

For who was good gave them life
And who is good is praying for life
It was all they could see
But this time they blinked away
The tears that would never let them be
For they knew that those who would believe
On earth may one day grieve
But in heaven God's promise they will receive

We can meet at the pass
I don't care from where you arrive
The decision is yours to make
The question though is mine
Will you walk as you are?
Not as a reflection
Or as a scar
For in your beauty lies nature
Living free no matter the wind
A pure face without deception
A soft heart without malice
These things you possess
You must only ask for courage
To believe in your past
Ready now to live as a river beds memories
For you have no childs wonder left
No need to walk like all the rest
You are ready at the pass
As am I
It is there where we begin
It is where two equals can rest
Looking for peace
Whether east or west
That you must decide is upon you now
Though it is not about direction
Nor any vow
Only the courage to believe
That a tree is as beautiful barren
As spring leaves that will soon be fallen

Walking on the side of the freeway in my mind
With our hearts dancing inside a memory
Like a song that takes your breath away
What can you say
But hearing your heart beat
Is something I will never forget

My smile for you is the one that is real
A gift that you will never have to pay back
Even if autumn is lost
All its colors too warm to turn
They wait for the season of their glory
While I wait for you to decide on mine

Let’s just make each other well first
We don’t have to discuss the ending
Or even each page along the way
Being happy is a clear mind
The next step is without pretending
And your embrace is my healing

That's ok baby
Dress up nice and clean
Be professional
Listen to your friends
But when you're with me tonight
Stick that needle in your arm
Be a **** star
Shove a knife into your art
Write words about suicide
Smash your guitar upon my soul
All I see is fire in my bed
And in your heart
And tomorrow we can begin again
Like the good little people we are

The birds and the breezes of a moment
Like so many people I came to know
Living long enough in my sight for love
But leaving without planting seeds that grow

Flags at half-mast from a grateful nation
I thought the same of a long lost friend
There is more than one who knew me well
But without a goodbye my past left with them

We’ve kissed so many people without thought
We remember now how it hurts so much
All that remains are the vacations you loved
You rescued them from the ruins of his touch

All of your feelings are ready to cope  
You like the view but the distance is better
We really feel these things the same way
I can prove it if only you would come closer

Virtual life isolation is considered VIP seating as all who may enter are pre-screened in a self-preservation dance of solipsism as strained honesty pours from my fingers onto the digital RGB floor only to harden intermingled with the lives of dissonant strangers who reciprocate eagerly in revealing their weaknesses in a prosaic waltz across a frozen dreamscape where our misunderstood inner souls are reflected back to us as they float in monolithic mass on top of the depths of final judgment. Rather than providing final victory to the daily control alternate delete lather rinse repeat boot of my innermost fantasies and trauma which are as random as my physical interactions it seems recently and most superficially I was moved to speak of a self-assured young woman cleverly drawing confidence off the bottom of the deck while casually discarding competence who is triumphantly opening a high-end eatery of sorts but with time I find she is only the manager and after all prefers not to talk business because my questions have exhausted her ego-infested opening line as she stuffed her face with samples of diabolical confections soon to be marketed under the guise of pretentious cuisine for the beautiful people as we exhaust ourselves each day enduring the ambitious one-dimensional high-riser who wishes for depth never seen or heard in personal conversation but now the standard error of his own estimate deviates from the arrogantly leveled but just plain wrong command uttered in disdain to those who have actually lived with the people represented by mooted numbers begging to be deleted and yet I remain challenged by a life-long puzzle as I try not to make eye-contact but somehow still absorb the possible useful loaves and fishes of the God-fearing seeker of salvation that has been promised and now must be advertised as available in a never-ending give away as long as I humble myself in the prescribed manner neither to the left or right but squarely as King James promised he understood but on the other channel the drones of war which made prophetic the words of the old general who lamented the possible obsolescence of heroism and cowardice reminding of a futuristic movie as it now seems I am cheering for the death star or possibly the machines that travel time back in order to **** the very person who would bring soul forward to remind the company that people and not profits are what God allows through the eye of the needle. In spite of all this my smiling children know I love them deeply and there is no place that pain can be so welcome as in my heart to suffer willingly and openly until they are able to look at me and understand my ways and my decisions which may never be fully communicated because if God does shockingly exist then the revelation of truth will be delivered when they finally open the box that contains their thinking minds and the mysteries that may require further illumination. In a rush for meaning the virtual tour of all that touches my life is completed without fanfare and yet I cannot know who or what I am other than a mad ball of pain and confusion masquerading as a competent oar in the river of legal tender which I continue to worship as the answer to all manner of doubt.

Yes, it's the way you look
I hope you are as different as your eyes
But don't look at me like that
Unless your voice speaks without disguise

Something took your place
There was despair, now I pray for grace
I let it get away from me
The memory I left behind won’t let me be
There was a time when I was so unafraid
Now I can only think about mistakes
Instead of thinking about someone new

Something took my place
I’m getting nowhere, I’m losing the race
I can no longer see
The vision I am chasing doesn’t recognize me
There was a time when I would have stayed
Now I only think about what keeps me awake
And the time I thought I was in love with you

Uninvited though I may be
The butterflies were not to be led astray
Dancing upon low-cut flowers
They knew to avoid my footsteps
Their work was of far greater importance
My presence was of no consequence

My heart sheathed no sword
The sun baptized my bare skin
As I continued forward in silence
Solitude granted me clear conscience
For in nature vanity is not the soul of flowers
And wealth is not the seed for its life

It is in my word that I find what is left of me
Though temptation remains like a rusty nail
Holding fast with memories of the initial blow
Foolish and incomplete thoughts mark each step
But a man alone without a judge can see
As stones never to be thrown guide his way

No one dies today
Only our doubts
No one lives today
Only our souls
Speak if you can
Believe what you must
I will pray upon my heart
and not ancient scrolls

Like a Roman soldier
Who knows the truth
Apart from his people
And those who follow
To choose to walk alone
To know the faith of a bird
It is the life of my heart
Living with joy and sorrow

The is no judgment
For we are the miracle
The mistakes of a stranger
Are the same as mine
It is what I know
The question is how
The spirit is risen in me
Yet still I remain blind

I would cry like a baby
If my child would suffer
I would know then why I live
But why must I leave them
They will grow in time
And I will shrink to nothing
Is it then that a dying man asks
For a new father to save him?

I wonder about it
How much am I worth
Am I worth so much to be a coward?
Is it more valuable to be a coward
Or a dead man

I need to be baptized
But it has to be by John the Baptist
Not just anybody
Unless it's really only about me
And God's plan

If I saw enough killing
And horror
Maybe I'd become what I saw
Maybe I'd even laugh about dying
And not cry about why it began

It's not about being human
Not anymore
If I can't **** the enemy
How could I live with myself
The way my flag says I can?

I’ve said so much
and like every word,
gone as the memory of a baby,
the things I wish to be
are as distant as an old pinewood floor;
The one I walk on no more

You heard what I said,
but you said actions are what people remember
How did I make you feel?
It's not so easy to be memorable,
all I can hope is that the past was real enough;
most times smooth, sometimes rough

When the rain falls
I take the time to count my regrets
Blessings are for other people
I don’t know that I did anything right by them
I can’t seem to shake this feeling,
about what it is my worries are stealing

I don’t think you’re waiting anymore
I know I’m not
That’s the biggest lie I’ve told all day
It’s hard to believe I can live like this,
knowing through an open window, what I’ve seen,
was the rain that once washed our hearts clean

Winter followed me inside
I used to smile at the cold
It always drew you close
Like I am now to the silence of leaves that have fallen

I heard a love song today
I used to feel that way once
I thought I heard your voice
But it was just the echo of a season soon forgotten

Seeing myself walk next to someone younger than me
I see how much I’ve changed
It’s not just my thoughts
It’s the look upon my face

I’ve learned the secret of my life
I thought my time had passed
But now I know it’s not true
Every time a snowflake melts there is another one calling

I don’t understand falling in love so quickly anymore
Every flower is pretty in its own way
But what of the roots we cannot see
Only a true friend can take your place

"Hey good lookin' can I buy you a drink?"

A Shakespearean muse cannot alas venture forth upon the fragrance of allure

"***? Are you high?"

Love is my intoxication and thus I've become an 18th century daffodil who shall remain chaste and true

"Dude! You got to hear this whack chick over here. Offer her a drink"

"Hey gorgeous... let me buy you a round! What are you drinking?"

I drink from the wine of discretion and allow its strength to escort me on as a golden fleece protecting virtue, honor and consequence

"*******! Dude! You weren't kidding. This chick is out there!"

"Hey Aphrodite... but why are you out alone with all your friends? Where's Zeus or whoever?

He rides the wings of Pegasus looking for our land of plenty while his heart resides next to mine in a dance of promise and expectation

"Well if it was me I'd be right here because I'd never leave you alone"

The heart cannot be bound by another; it must be allowed to roam free in the wilds testing it's will and only then can one know if love is fleeting or everlasting

"**** babe, whatever you're on I want a case...."

Search your heart for your true self; it is not an acquisition but a dormant flower waiting for you to shed your false notions of manhood and prideful restraint

"Ohhh kaaayyy." Good luck with that sweetie... I think my friends are leaving."

The hard part is to say it with a straight face....

i’ve never been an actor
only degrees of myself
the mercury keeps rising
as if it has a mind of itself
it feels like a neo noir movie
dark, grim like a detective
so much I didn’t foresee
so much that’s unexpected

i have a friend, beautiful, caring
we had drinks at a restaurant
she wanted me to meet her friend
what is it that she could really want
i keep wanting to ask her about it
it’s as if my heart is afraid to die
it’s as if i can’t risk one heart beat
if only she knew my eyes don’t lie

which one is worse
being unhappily secure
or sleepless fulfillment
it’s something we all endure
i don’t worry about lunch
or buying someone a ring
i have you in all my prayers
but you only live by the wing

i wonder how one-sided it can be
dreams are only what we remember
if I tell someone then it’s not a dream
it’s just another line from an actor
it's like watching people board a plane
i’m not sure if they know why they’re going
waiting to get there is how they live
but arriving is how you’ll soon be knowing

Spaces between my fingers
Lips that only feel empty skies
A heart beat without an echo
Until someone say's baby you're mine

Upon me walks alone the longing
For the reflection from your eyes
To fill the distance between us
Until someone say's baby you're mine

You were as happy as a girl but a sad one too
Everything you could be in a day
So many times I wondered what you believed
Was it me or something only you could feel
I never was sure what you were trying to say

Listening to my memories
This time a world that wasn’t make believe
The things that were real
Were all I would ever need
It seems so much easier now than it was
Like a happy boy sitting in a tree

How many years since I was like that
I drank to those who knew how long it would last
You were all the reason I would ever need
I finally became a man one sad day
I'm still wondering what you did with my past

The song kept me awake
Even a dream gets tired trying to believe
It happened once before
I was sharing the wrong bed
It seemed so much harder now
For the boy not knowing who was me

We can be deep,
alone in a silent world;
or distant,
wishing upon a star;
but when we come together
as a community,
whether in mourning
over the loss of someone who touched us all
or to share the joy of the insular world of music,
where those who plot to save us
with the clever comfort of fear cannot penetrate,
it is there where we can see the promise of love;
unconditional;
a smile for a stranger without expectation;
a man and a woman dancing together
without remorse or confusion;
go there,
take it with you,
it means something
and it exists already in your consciousness,
in the unseen world of your being,
where your feelings live,
always in need of a friend

Character without will;
a butterfly crawls into its cocoon,
walking away from true love;
who will exert it?

Humanity without strength;
a world at war with morals,
a nation governed by fear;
who will show it?

Ingenuity without vision;
a scientist splitting atoms,
a man become death;
who will see it?

Power without balance;
a culture believing in a man,
a man who knows;
who will challenge it?

I wonder if anybody lives out on the limb
I’m not wearing a dead man’s clothes
I don’t have to worry about getting ambushed
My homestead is mine and nobody minds
The frontier is no longer about stealing land
It’s about why young men take their own lives

I’m not casting any nets because I live in one
I’m caught already and tangled up in twine
I don’t have a horse to cross a river full of ice
I don’t have a people, but I have a family
I don’t know what I am anymore to anyone
But the sun on a golden canvas is still my friend

I gave her so many hints I thought I wrote a book
But she won’t move like she’s a stone in the tide
Then she tried to get me to meet her friend
It was like a trickle of water to fill my canteen
Was she as afraid of me leaving as I am of staying?
There’s plenty of time to talk about things like that

The river I once crossed by bridge waits for my sins
The melted ice tells stories of warm beds of silt
Where the river ends is where my fingers join yours
Somebody else can choose the time of my funeral
I can only choose the road that I want to walk
And if dust be my skin then you will be my bath

Before I go on or begin or continue
I thought to remind you; I’m still that
old car; once shiny new in the showroom;
the one you once admired but now I’ve
faded a bit or maybe a lot; I don’t mind the
dents so much anymore because I know
it’s at least a sign of honesty because it
is all there and still I know how good it
can be

All the words are here, waiting on a
feeling describing how the world stole
what you were born with along with
what was learned but lost on the way;
You know what happened but for some
reason the mark you left on us all was
not to your liking; maybe it’s because
you think we either don’t remember
you or instead remember you but wish
to forget

There’s not a tree in the forest that
hasn’t felt the terror of lightening above
or the heat of a fire below or the cut
of a blade within; but that is the life;
shedding, healing, growing; making
shadows and shelter for the birds
who understand its purpose; capturing
the breezes that blow for those
who wonder about such things

But you only see what shallow minds
value and not what nature allows
you to be; your dreams bring alive
what is inside and it is not your
flaws that make birds and squirrels
gather and live by your gifts; it is
not the scar they leave behind that
judges your worth; it is not their passage
through your life that ends yours

You felt like a memory; a gulch once proud
but now abandoned by the rain; used
by those who once needed you so badly;
but it is what you did for them that matters
and that is who you are even if someone
thinks of you as a wistful promise of what
once was

What can one say against you that they
do not stand accused; what good can one
do that you have not already done; what
can anyone compare to what you have
sacrificed knowing the day would come
when the world would try to separate itself
from you because superficiality is what
is served in high places while wisdom and
dignity is cast aside; there is nothing that
can compare to you; nothing, except what
lives in a forest; beautiful, forever, you

I wonder about beautiful people
They gather together
And stand
And move
Switching perspectives
Always smiling
Unless they’re not
Then they leave
Then they do it again
And they say what they say
And nothing changes
But their view
Of one another
Not so much their opinion
But their angle
Because people don’t change
They just move

They act out their part
But is it who they are?
Or who they think they should be?
Really they are just desperate
To stand somewhere important
They breathe a sigh of relief when something intelligent is said
Or witty
Because it confirms their standing
And yet it’s so silly
Because what does it matter
To be amongst people
Or to be alone?
It’s all the same
Unless you are trying to get laid

I’ve never learned a thing at a party
Except that I hate them now
I don’t want to be the life of the party
I’d rather people not remember me at all
Except for maybe one thing that I said
One small thing
That was so profound that I could not utter another sentence
Because what would be the point?
Each additional word drowns the previous one into irrelevance
Because then they can’t think about what you said
Instead they must continue to listen
Then they forget
And then where are you?
Standing next to beautiful people
Who one day won't be so beautiful
Unless they shed themselves of these things
Standing next to beautiful people
Who one day won’t be so beautiful
Unless they shed themselves of these things

A fateful cocoon
Just a feeling
Nobody told you
You just knew
You hear sounds
And sense the light
As you ready yourself
For loves revival

A sparse moon
Staring at the blue disk
Awaiting his lover
Silently wondering
Aglow from desire
Reflecting passion
Fed by the desperation
Of loves survival

You pushed through
The vine was bare
A budding romance
Warned by your thorns
To be ogled
And pruned
Until the day
Of loves arrival

Every spoken promise has failed
I’m not going to test my faith anymore
Because it only makes my soul weep
I cannot tell myself never again
I cannot tell you to trust me again
Because I know that words are cheap
I can only hope that what is strong
Finds its way through my heart
Before I open my mouth to speak
I can only hope that what I swallow
Only gives me the power to be true
And not the temptation to be weak

In a state of waiting
For us to be civilized
Or so they believed
But it is only for God
And our true image
As only he conceived

They brought books
But we know the word
And it is not spoken
Now they bring equality
We know our desires
They will not be broken

Seemingly dystopian
A society unworthy
Humans without love
Instead exotic allure
Spice aroma pallet
A silken body glove

And now your world
Where needles *****
And camels groan
While the waiting ones
Only ask to be free
From words of stone

It’s been a while for you
You’re sitting thinking of then
But you’re still young and beautiful
It wasn’t what you expected
Is it pride or did you really love him?

I’ve been on my own two feet
That’s the way I walk these days
I needed to find my balance
But I want to be uneasy underfoot
Like when someone new changes my ways

I could dig up some old pictures
Read that letter
But I know who I  am
Whatever she said was true
It’s the reason I can’t think about forever

We both know our memories
What good are they now?
Not very if you won’t love me
Even if the sea is filled with pieces of the past
Hurry, let me kiss you before your forget how

I’ve already given you my heart
It’s been yours for so long
You felt it in the rain and pain
That is how you have survived
I cried too while life did you wrong

If I could hold your hand once
It would always be on your mind
The soft touch before love is born
But I won’t try to drag you along

Our minds silently racing about
Trying not to hold on too hard
Our smiles say take me now
We both know now we belong

Take my hand
Become my lover too soon
As we walk through a crowd
It will never end
It’s time to believe again

The light that became a shadow
Was the hint we needed for more
When we begin to close our eyes
We both know what we will find

Are you uncomfortable now?
It's the only way a moment becomes a life
Somebody has to try

I never thought I could forget myself
Remembering how to let you win
Wondering if you are feeling it too
But a fool must give his life to you

Take my hand
Kiss me before you meant to
In the middle of a crowd
It will never end
It’s time to believe again

Mental processes so deep, bathing
alone at the bottom of the ocean,
like a baby before his mother ruined
him; a book before it’s opened; right
yesterday, wrong today; fundamental,
primary, calm before a tragedy, simple
before complexity; knowing the first
step may be wrong in the pursuit of
intent, but living easy in the fragile
consequence of decision where
coherence need not beg permission
to venture forth into bemused oration,
the stimulation of provoking thought
and triumphant rejection of legalisms
cleverly stated to establish the guilt
of an innocent

Underneath the deluge of our impending
life our fears seek sanctuary within the
mind or is it a place to avoid leaving no
room for kindness which must take refuge;
we want the right to make a statement
without fear for do they have any concept
of our problems; but I do want to understand;
justice was always known but only as it
pertained to me; but though I thought
about transcending difficulties it was
something only about myself instead that
of others; I only wanted to live within the
justification of my happiness

If I were your lover could you learn from
me or live knowing that I disagreed with
you on something so vital to you; could
you believe that my silence does not
conspire against you but instead is my
journey towards sanity as I must work
things out without further intervention
by the interests of someone who may
or may not feel agreeable with the musty
smells of the books that line the walls
of my mind; could you allow me to
contend with the past even though
everyone else has decided to move
on with their lives?

Are you the type who would follow
the law no matter how far it may
stretch your heart; but if allowed to
make your statement would you know
why you uphold what corrupt men
decided was just; I wonder if the ground
upon which you walk is worthy of my
worship when it is not the ground upon
which I lay but instead upon your good
graces that I must beg, otherwise I might
change my mind about what is just and
what is merely expedient

To be responsible for your actions
without regard to ambition or wealth;
you may choose the direction; you may
change the direction; it is your choice
alone; or you may delude yourself of
what is right in the name of your own
greatness; that anonymity and a humble
life is somehow the same as prison; what
we have done is to make someone feel
insignificant for honoring the most
significant virtues we all stand for,
truth and justice; yet it is true that truth
need no representation from a skilled
jurist as even a child can know what
his own eyes have witnessed; but
would it be altered by the times in
which he lived or would logic destroy
his small mind and bend it so that he
may be reduced to choosing between
nightfall or a shadow

Would it occur to you in time or is it
wise to learn from another to know
what is true, but if you wait until your
own goodness or awareness of another’s
pain reveals itself to you may be too late;
it may be that you cannot cross the river
so while you wait on the evil side you
must know how to recognize the good
that must live while it too waits for the
promised land

Do you know wrong to be wrong
without exoneration when compared
to greater wrongs; would you argue
against guilt if they spoke in favor of
that in which you believe; who would
be willing to tell the truth knowing their
life will be examined thoroughly; but
you must bring it forward, to endure
the indignity of a merciless soul search;
reason exists solely to defend against
depth that would bury the truth; what
way of life would ignore these things; it
is the life of fear that makes us choose
the wrong things in the hope that
good exists somewhere underneath
the crushing weight of the light to
which one day we will surface

What solumn countenance would curtain
a joyous explosion of masks, wigs and
gay costumes lifted upon the shoulders
of unicorns, hoisted by green mice with
chattering teeth as the teeming throbbing
wall of ever sharpening claws and whip
tails tightening the knots that bind them
with each living brick?

What strained smile would do honor
to the leaping unicorn, transporting
mere mortals transformed by imagination
relinqueshed of reason and the laws of
man where those who carry no haute
or couture of those most favored swallows
that flap their wings until the day their
frivolity turns it's head on their foolishness?

What mind locked behind lonely doors
would leap ahead of birds shed of tails
and teeth and horns that fly about the
land unabashadedly crossing seas and
rivers cooling the hardened hearts of
men who cannot believe in the fairy tails
of fantasy because what their God decided
was that the poor must always be with us?

He was lost at what he couldn’t see,
seemingly adrift
It was a dream that couldn’t sleep,
something he missed
The time had passed to think anymore,
it was a time to feel
Like women dancing for men,
he which part was real
The third person detachment failed him,
but someone else’s story felt better
He read once that travel was like love,
but he lost the letter
It was only what he could remember,
and what she once asked
What he couldn’t bury below frozen ground,
he hid behind his mask

As he walked around the corner
Each silhouette of the past separated
Every transformation of his soul
And though dirt stains everyone
The soil where he began remained under his feet

Through every age
From as a boy to an aging man
A new realization
Each of what he once believed
And now what  it is he must accommodate

Once he knew ignorance
It was as common to him as the sky was blue
Then the truth surrounded him
Like desperate men emerging from the rocks
Ready to ****, if only he knew it came from within

He was saddened by the death of her pet
And the broken mind of a friend
While his own battles raged from behind the rocks
Where the images of man reflect upon one another
And the faith in a real God awaits a true believer

I am not the point of a spear
And because of this
I have drawn the walls near
But I feel no discomfort
For there is nothing left
Except what I hold dear

We cannot **** everyone
We cannot arrest everyone
We cannot **** a burning bush

The world stands to one side
Watching the violence of men
While the conflicted who cried
Sleep between culture and truth
Despairing for our innocence
Standing accused inside the divide

Why do we believe we are the chosen ones?
Why do we violate the rights of others?
Why do we value one child over another?

The old one could never understand
Why we cry so easily about life
When his friends bloodied white sand
But we question our choices
As history reveals only death
Our history will not be as they planned

Every generation watches as it dies
Every generation wonders about the end
Every generation listens for Gabriel's horn

I do not need to prove my freedom
By mocking another man’s beliefs
Because that is not freedom
That is fear of the unknown
That is fear of our own faith
I thought we were all God’s children