I dreamt last
night of a long
lost friend
which was strange
because I hadn't been
drinking
and this friend
talked me out
of suicide
even though I wasn't
considering it
and I almost reached
out to her
when I woke up
but that would
be worse than
suicide

On a moonlit night I ask you to dance
Here take my hand just take a chance
Don’t be shy; Don’t be scared
There is nothing for you to fear
I’ll wrap you in a wild romance
All I ask for is one chance
I’ll guide & lead and show the way
Just follow me; it’s okay
I’m a partner like no other
In no time I’ll be your lover

Dance with me and you’ll forget the rest
Simply put I am the best
Quickly I will take you over
Your defenses you will lower
You’ll say your vows; You’ll say “I do”
Trust me this much will be true
But when the honeymoon does end
That’s when all of it begins
I’ll show you the true side of me
A side before you did not see

I am possessive
I am controlling
It comes on quick
There is no warning
Lose your friends
Lose your family
The power I wield
is uncanny

The music’s changed
The lights have dimmed
A dance of virtue
is now of sin
You try to leave
but I won’t let you go
Your soul is lost
Time’s pace is slow

An empty shell
you will become
No more happy
No more fun
A slave to me
is all you are
I cut your flesh
I leave a scar

A quiet scream
inside you make
And when there’s nothing
left to take
I still take more
I take it all
Because of course
if you recall

You married me
You did your part
You said your vows
Till death we part
Now it’s time
to cash that in
Here you lose
No one wins

All because you took a chance
On a moonlit night when I asked you to dance

he may have broken her
but her eyes will still glow golden in soft sunlight
even if her cheeks are stained with tears

s.s

sometimes i want to take off my skin.
and show everyone what lies i hid under my complexion.

there is no where to run, to lies to hide behind

just the painful truth

the agonizing honesty i've hidden behind a simple smile.
the words i wanted to speak but never had the courage to say.

our skin is just something we hid behind to shield our real selves and our true form and what we all have under our exterior is the

s a m e.

we are all identical.

i hope you never have to know
the depth of my devotion
because to know
would be to understand
the emptiness you left in me
when you had nothing
to give back
and surely such
guilt
would eat you alive

<!>
inspired by a conversation with Maira Kalman


******* a name, adopt a persona, let my fingers do the talking,
place the instrumental sharp point tip upon the blankety blank paper,
maestro baton raised, coordinating,
the first sound, the vocal chords trembling,  
the first thought, the ultrasound image, entrance of a first violin,
coalescing into, into the initializing single primary phonation,
the stinging geometry of chance at last,
throwing  down the gauntlet, glove slapping, and the
tendons tense, the mouth opens, release and indentation,
a letter's curvature, a black and white downward stroking,
a sign is televised, revealed and released

a one way only sign

time bends knee, gravity suspended, terror morphs to
expelling rapid firefights of imagery needy for spacing,
even pauses mid-word  leave just this:

where is the in in
intimate?

are you the in in
inmate,
or the jailor at the gate?

you swear never again

until committing once more,

a sentence commutation, by committing a first sentence,

and the greater toll taken and paid for,

and the in in in-nate,
questions your sanity

happily


<•>

9/17/17 10:55pm