I want to believe that I'll be happy.
I want to try to enjoy while I can.
There is no cure at all for my problem;
Does that mean I won't feel normal again?
I was taught the rule: ignorance is bliss
And what I know now cannot be unlearned.
My issue lies in my beautiful life
And in the many memories I've earned.
My greatest pain rests in the idea of
One day losing the few people I love.

I give up now
I surrender
To my heartache;
I remember
All those moments
When I first fell
From heaven's bliss
To this new hell;
Still remember
Those tempting lies,
Those sweet kisses
And now goodbye...
I can't forget-
I won't forget-
Want to forget
For I regret,
But this is real
And now it's done
And here I stand
Back in the sun.
The light so bright,
The air too calm,
A lack of pain;
My empty palm,
No hand to hold,
No one to fight;
It feels so wrong
To be this right.

My heart is like an old butterfly net
That has a gaping hole torn into it;
What it catches flutters at its leisure
And leaves surely with time, or with the wind,
Leaving my heart empty and I'm sorry
That I cannot keep the bubbly-ness here.
I've been broken; I try but I'm a fool,
Holding on to something I've never held.

You know that feeling
you get when
you drive at night, and you
just want to feel the car fly, so you
push your foot as far as
it'll go down on the gas,
down to the baseboard,
your engine howling like a wolf in the
moonlight,
yet somehow it doesn't feel
fast enough?

That's what it feels like
getting over
you.

Getting over you is like
sneaking home, trying not to awaken
the parents that you
left dozing,
but every
single
solitary
stair
creaks underneath your weight.

It is the
new routine with the
broken ankle;
the unanswered
correspondance;
the sailing ship on
the windless ocean;
getting over you is the
road taken and laden with potholes;
the refusal of the snow
to melt,
my feet slipping out from underneath me
on the remaining ice.

Getting over you is the
flameless fire,
the un-Happy New Year,
the series of unhappy poems.

Getting over you
is the bottle of champagne I drank
to quench my thirst for you,
the texts I sent you and didn't remember,
the tears I shed as I begged the
universe (and anyone else in ear shot)
to explain why it had to
turn out this way.

You know that feeling where
up is down,
left is right,
inside is flipped outside?

You're gone.

I am a butterfly nest
That holds caterpillars of dreams
And cocoons of potential.

They'll all grow to
Beautiful butterflies
Someday, one day.

Some butterflies are gentle
They all are colorful
And others have glass shards as wings.

You are my shelter;  
Your arms protect me
And your voice comforts;
You are my safety.

Your compassion is
Endless, yet so full
As your heart is strong,
And so beautiful.

Everything good ends;
It is simple fact.
I'll cherish this time
We have us intact.

Another fact that is true:
I could never forget you.