All these memories are drowning my mind, making it harder for me to breathe. I think about what was once the greatest time of my life, and now, tears stain my face and I'm wheezing for breath because I cannot stand the thought of my life without you, making more of those memories. My life without the one who I made the best memories with. You've held me up when my bones were frail, and weak, when I fell- more than a few times- you had patience with me. More patience than anyone has ever had. As I've heard, all good things must come to an end, and well, I suppose they have, but I will forever thank you for that short, little good thing that we endured in our life.

I shouldn't be upset about you not being a part of me or my life anymore, you were too toxic, but here I am sitting in the dark crying, tears stained on my cheeks, wishing you were here. It's hard to go a day without someone that's been in your life continuously for 2 years straight. No matter who you lose, it's a loss and it hurts like hell.

You loved me like the phases of moons, all at once, then slowly, you would fall back into your phases, your love for me slowly getting smaller. Some days, I would break. I would cry, and scream at you, and you would build back up, to loving me fully, like a full moon illuminates the dark, night sky. I gave my all loving you, thinking one day, the moon will stay it's large, full size, brightening the sky, but slowly realized that the world is cruel, and that you never actually ever loved me.

I was taught not to let a boy see the stains left on my heart by another boy but ******* how could I not, you were so inviting and helpful and I had to show you and you never disappointed me. You made these scars fade. Sure I got new scars, but they were the good ones. The kind that you look back on, smirk, and think that you wouldn't want any marks like this from any other boy. You make my soul and the scars look like perfection and I know it's wrong to romanticize pain, but god, how could I not find beauty in everything you do?

You are a flower,
Your body is a stem.
Flowers require lots of water and nutrients.
Sunlight is vital for a plant to live. like a plant,
we all need some light in our life.
You are my light.
Brightening my day.
I cannot survive without your touch, taste, and love.
It's a daily necessity.
Your face is the beautiful flower attached to your stem.
Without light,
The beauty is not there.
The flower dies.
I am nothing without you.
I am a flower.
Without you, my beauty is unseen,
I am dead inside.
You are vital for my survival,
I need you.

You know,
When they say "would you like me to punch you in your left arm so your right arm hurts a little less?"
That's what my body does.
I'm sad,
And my heart is throbbing and tears are streaming down my face,
So my body encounters a solution.
I get a headache, and there's less focus on my sadness.
I worry about medication, and rest,
And I think that my body is wonderful,
Because it's the only one
Trying to save me anymore,
And though it's just a small gesture,
I feel a whole hell of a lot less sad.

I am a cocoon of sorts,
When I love, I love hard.
I work hard,
Every day,
Loving and caring, holding, nurturing.
I try my hardest to build the confidence of the one I love.
I'm there,
I'm whole,
Until one day,
The person I love,
Is so confident,
So ready,
That they leave.
And when they leave,
I crack, I break, I'm empty.
They're gone,
And I'm stuck,
Hanging there,
Alone,
Like a cocoon.