The door shuts behind me
I hear the locks engage
Click, click, click
The blinds close
It's dark
Cold
Lonely
In silence I listen
I wait
I wander
Aimlessly
Hands stretched
I feel nothing
I see nothing
So I sit and do nothing
Defeated
But now I'm stuck in the cold
Dark and lonely
So I stand and walk forward
Reach forward
For change
For Light
For the open door

Oases are vainglorious
Often indulging in their own mystique
Coveting the admiration
Inspiring others to aspire for their majestic independence
But unlike rivers, they do not flow
They do not connect
They do not grow into something bigger than themselves
This connection is power
It is love
Be a river

We all have the power as individuals
To confront every injustice
To resist tyranny
So every ember moon
I look to the sky
Inspired
Prepared for every battle
And fly with those
Who look up for opportunities
And not down at misfortunes
So our fires continue, to burn
strong

What secrets do your eyes hold?
what desires could I fulfill?
What pains could I mend?
What wonders could I cultivate?
Your eyes are the window to your soul
One day I hope
You will open the blinds
And let me see

I don't want to fight anymore
I don't care who was right
I don't care about blame
I don't care about what happened
But I do care about this feeling
This feeling of betrayal
This feeling of disappointment
This feeling of abandonment
It didn't always feel like this
It doesn't have to feel like this
It shouldn't feel like this
But it does
Though it shouldn't
So it will, nevermore
I promise

This time of year, I often hear of new beginnings
A slate wiped clean, a "do over"
All mistakes forgiven and all debts pardoned
But no wrong is right without effort
Effort is futile without a plan
And a plan is not justified without practice
This time of the year I reflect on my preparation
This time of year I reflect on my presentation
This time of the year I don't wipe my slate clean
I look for the catalyst of the mess I've made
Because this isn't a new beginning
It's a continued effort, to one day, get it right

Some would say the heart is the most precious ***** in the body
But I disagree, see for me it’s my mind
It’s hunger for reason must be fed
It’s thirst for information must be quenched and this precious vulnerability must be protected
Solitaire exercises of discipline strengthen these walls with lessons so essential their very nutrients must be extracted from the most sacred of confines
Locks, rusted with petrifying shadows of blame
Contempt fills these boxes that if released arbitrarily could prove to be terminal
Preparation has skilled me of such treachery but no YOU attacked the heart
An ***** most would say is the most precious because it can cloud reason and influence the ******* that is the human brain
Turning pain into tranquil contempt
Removing logic from the vital equation of understanding into a dismal acceptance of average
Well I’m here to tell you though your best efforts, your attempts at my emotional demise have proven to be futile
I stand before you wise to your woes spun effortlessly weaving a pictured filled with promise and no action
My heart, although damaged will learn from this strife and beat stronger and better than ever before.
It shall not ache nor bleed for you, but it thanks you for your time….and this lesson.