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In the hollow space between
who I am and who I should have been,
as my failures echo around me.
I am only human.
Yet, regret lingers
like a bitter taste on my tongue,
offering a feeble defence
that I refuse to voice,
because my words are like pebbles
too small to fill this pit of regret
gorging on my conscience
so, I swallow them whole,
letting them settle
heavy in my throat
while you drown in my silence,
and wear your disappointment
like a weighted coat.

©️Lizzie Bevis
I CHAMENI STIGMI
(THE LOST MOMENT)

the mountain
places a cloud
behind its head

dozes off
into the blue
of an afternoon

the father's shadow
watches his child
pedal a trike

chasing a chicken
in circles
laughing hysterically

this a moment
that will vanish
into a Greek sky

that only
a passing poet
will notice enough

in his head where
words will
re-enact it endlessly

even as time
fades and
years vanish

and the French lady
states that reality is
'les mensonges et les larmes'.

*

Finally got around to these fragments that came together in a moment after 40 years! But as the Greeks would have it. . . "Αγάλι-αγάλι γίνεται η αγουρίδα μέλι."

"Agáli-agáli yínete i agourída méli"

“The unripe grape becomes sweet like honey slowly-slowly.”
ZAK'S PRAYER

little Zak
(just a little scrap of a chap)    
with a deep Barry White voice

enquires(as he enquires
about everything) :
“Why is your hair white? ”

listens patiently to the explanation
how after a head injury
“I went white overnight! ”

being a good Christian child
tells me he will pray for me
for the “black to be back! ”

I’m very tempted
to dye it for the next day
just to prove his prayer right

when his fervent prayer
doesn’t turn the situation around
...he frets:

I tell him
God & me
are both happy

with it
…like this
“Really? ” he asks.

“Really! ”
I affirm.
he grimaces

“Have it your own way then
but man...
it makes you look old & grim!"

I grin
tell him that
I am what I am

but that I can live with it
"Ok..!" he sighs
"...have it your own way!"

*

He was a lovely sincere child who pitied my whiteness of beard and hair. I basked in his pity...it was so loving and tender. And just where did this tiny skinny little child get that Barry White/ Shaft voice! One of my nicest moments in teaching.
You bloom where  
you’re planted
the Sage
told the Priest

Your flowers
won’t blossom
if distant
and bleak

As fate
seeds your valley
the force
reaches out

Reseeding
creation
in whispers
— that shout

(The New Room: January, 2025)
Maybe it adds up, the things we wish to ignore
And we see it set in all at once
The worst case scenario happens
and I knew it from the get go
I felt relief rushing in
That I didn't die as it happened
Like I can still breathe in
and find ways to sort the issue
It multiplies, the level of the next thing to come
I cannot believe how much this human
Is made to see in one lifetime
The limits to be taken further
One panic to other, one escalation to another
All it adds up to high blood pressure
And one day I will completely disappear
Without a care and no thought to spare.
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