forgive me
for i am the one you love
for i am one who’s betrayed you
do not forgive me
i deserve it; but I don’t
know
its my fault    
but please
forgive me

blessed green herb
your sent easily reckoned
haze of grey fill the air
spark me once again
take a ****  
inhale the smoke
infiltrate my ribcage
like a dungeon entrap
the perception of your psyche
become who i am
and what i want
temporarily fill the hole
in my being

Im addicted.
I'm addicted to the pain
and I don't understand
when the repercussions equal shame.
Why can't I learn
that my actions have consequences?
That brief moment of bliss
that one little kiss
wasn't worth it in the end.
I betrayed you  
more than once should I add.
I gave myself away
when you're all I've ever wanted
all I've ever had

in this toxic love
i held so close
i gave you the power
to destroy me
to change everything i am
your anger, a beast wielding in your fists
would come out to play
your words lash at my heart
your fists swing and strike
precisely pounding again and again  
leaving me bruised and branded
leaving you crying and in pieces
blinded by love
comforting the man who had just finished beating me

the present is a prison
i cant outbreak
my past paints pleasant pictures
upon my windowless walls
leaving me with the world
in my mad mind
bestowing reflections of my future
craving the imminent to dementment
longing for my liberty
fighting for my freedom

his fingers leave chills
trailing down my body
blurry and faded
he knows i'm sedated
his hands are clasps
his arms chains
his pleasure
my pain
strength is a memory.

love is my addiction
because: except no.
addiction is my love
because it isn’t
it’s what I hate most
But want more than anything

I felt it first at fourteen
the hollow in my ribcage
Entrenched nothingness
Empty
Perforated the layers of my navel
From cover to cover  
A window in my chest  
Look through me
Nothing.

Roses who cloke the ****
Wilt in the morn aglow
They have sprouted spines
in past despair
Now wane inward
Despite the peace of
Those who pluck thee
thorns ***** thy flesh  
With bitter poison
thy bled with sorrow  
only to keep those afar
Roses stand lone  
With thy veil of ****

beyond the eyes lymit
the sun takes its last yawn
dispersing its mild breath on to the foam below
the night inhales,
gusting crisp winds
stirring the leaves of the palm

the sky whispers to the tide
pulling out onto the quiet sands
soft steps sneak along the shore
awaking resting sands with a soft crunch
footsteps trail the sands
but are slowly eaten up by hungry waves

the night’******presents tranquility
to the shivvers of the night air
the winds stand afoot
sending soothing silence as a gift

waves wish wash along the shore line
But the silence still stands
With the breath of the moon
silence still stands.