I see your smile and your laugh.
Every time I look your way,
it feels like a stab to the chest.
Is it an act? a play?
To make me feel the pain I put you through?
You moved on, rose above
but I'm still here, downing in the repercussions of our actions,
of my actions.
I'm now just a distant memory to you,
The mind is comfortably numb
Unaware of the repercussions
Holding guard at the gates of Eris
Invoking the discord with intensity
Gazing endlessly at dull perceptions
Anarchy is just a breath away
Holding our breath just to stave away
But the cries of horror are unheard
The mind is comfortably numb
Standing over you as the pleading begins,
Forgive my father for the justice I bring,
You murdered my Husband and tore my life apart,
Laughed in the courtroom no remorse in your heart,
No fear of anyone or being locked inside,
Her majesty's prisons filled you with pride,
An animal in a cage with more privileges than my own,
provided for the brutal murder of a man walking alone,
A test victim for the gang, so they would let you in,
Robbing 'the rich bastard' widened your drug filled grin,
One punch, one kill as his head cracked off the ground,
The laughter of your 'friends' were suddenly drowned,
As my husband convulsed and took his last breath,
You cowardly bastard stole his life and left,
He would of survived if you gave him a chance,
You could have called for an ambulance!
Instead I’m without a husband and a doting father of two,
The love drained from my heart as my blood runs cold blue,
I've waited ten years to take your pathetic fucking life,
I'll Carve you into pieces with this butchers knife!
Or shall I make this easy? With a bullet in the head?
I doesn't really matter as long as you’re dead!
Please let me go, I beg of you!
Your children will have no parents, if you go through,
with taking my life, you would be the main suspect,
Burdened with Murder and full of regret,
your husband wouldn't want this from you.....
YOU DARE SPEAK OF HIM, ILL CUT YOU IN TWO,
I BEG YOU, AND I’M NOT THE SAME MAN!
I WAS JUST A YOUNG BOY, BRAINWASHED BY THE CLAN!!!
I live with the guilt every night and day,
Praying to god to show me the way,
I have a family of my own, I've made a new start,
You kill me now? You tear another family apart.
Look in my wallet, there’s a picture inside,
of my wife and my daughter the root of my pride,
I work for charities to help victims of crime,
to help children to escape from the gangs born from the grime,
I vow I won't tell anyone of what you have done,
I understand your reasons, and why they begun.
UNDERSTAND? UNDER FUCKING STAND?
Coming from the man that killed my love, with his bare hands?
The man that sneered as he looked me in the eyes,
Laughed at his sentencing as he watched my daughter cry?
Who walked out of prison and began a new life,
While mine was finished when I became a widow of a wife,
Taking medication to keep my suffering inside,
Being sectioned for my illness, my daughters are in care,
Your luxury of a life? Do you think that it’s fair?
I have no reason to live, no family left,
The only peace I will have, is to watch your last breath.....