I built a wall, a fortress, a prison
I've been caught in the duldrums i need a tidal wave and wisdom
I need the noise to drown out the world crashing down around me
Lost in the ruins that found me
I dont like to feel  like a soulless machine
That wont dare approach another human being
I need to break out of prison and over the wall
What do we offer? Anything at all?
Institutionalized in this prison of my mind
I hardly function outside of it. Lost in thought, doing time

You're just a **** and should be left alone
Its what you want anyways, people dont like your tone
Always on guard ready for a fight
Even when theres no need, your always right
You big *******, saying you wont answer stupid questions
When the answers are obvious thatll teach them a lesson
You have reasons you're so snappy
It makes people cry, nobodys happy
And when that happens you turn to stone
Cant deal with emotions leave them alone
Beacause people **** you off, or you're just a ****
Its your fault relationships never worked
You think you know whats best
But people never listen so save your breath
Push everyone away so they cant ask for ****
Afterall you give what you get

Secrets create,
Enemies and friends.
Can start new trends.
Reveal new tech.
Endanger peace.
Turn blue to red.
Secret whispers.

Secrets welcome.
Extra income.
Conditional love.
Regretful outcomes.
Emotional sin.
The hidden grin.
Secret whispers.

Secret sounds.
Entrapped inside.
Craves to be found.
Results in lies.
Eats till it dies,
Till realized.
Secret whispers, do not hide.

are you sure you're being honest
are you sure when you say you love me
are you sure that i am what you want
are you sure i'm who i appear to be

because
i can be so dishonest
i can be so hard to love
i can be so hard to be around
i can be so easily deceiving

i can be
me

...

.
No my Darling, that is not snow.
Its not winter, it should be colder.
No my Darling, that is not snow.
Its just dandruff on your shoulder.

No my Dear, I am not in pain.
Neither am I hurting, or showing grief.
No my Dear, I am not in pain.
Its the lettuce in between your teeth.

Yes my Love, I am listening.
I was just temporarily distracted.
Yes my Love, I am listening.
But your friend is so attractive.

No my Sweet, its not that draughty.
Its not windy, you've got it wrong.
No my Sweet, its not that draughty.
Your skirts caught in your thong.

No my Darling, that is not snow.
It can't be true, its a wrong fact.
No my Darling, that is not snow.
Its just ******* on your compact.


© Pagan Paul (31/03/17)

Hell is this house.

Your phone calls
dropping at 4 am
like bomb blasts.

Your perfume,
like a refugee,
living between
my messy
bed sheets.

Your stuff,
strategically forgotten,
in every **** corner.

Each room a minefield.
Each drawer a thread.

I finally finish packing up the last boxes.
Load them in my car.
Close the front door.
Turn the engine on.
Leave.
See you waving from the rear-view mirror.