I thought losing you,
Was bad.

But when I take a step back,
It's the best thing
that's happened to me

When I was with you,
I constantly feared the worst.

But now,
I have nothing to fear

Without you my chains are released
And it feels so great,

To be free.

the waves crash
over my mind
words slash
over time

misplaced curiosity
had no home
until undoubtful atrocity
the thought i roam

i over think
all the time
to the brink
so devine

every word
to i cling
i cannot find
what they mean

ill figure it out
this ill do
until i come
to talk to you

then ill freeze
ill muck it up
without words
i am stuck

you make my blood boil
you leave a trail of turmoil

please leave me alone
there's other rooms in this home

stop touching me
give me my space please

"oh you hate me"
"no I just want space please"

you play the victim
then try to evict them

"what is wrong with you"
"look in a mirrors view"

I'm sorry but your annoying sometimes
the space I want, not yours but mine

and stop acting like I'm trouble
its you and its double

I bottle my anger
if released there's danger

because you'll get all up set
and blame me and yet

all I've ever wanted
was the space that you've taunted

I get that you don't understand
you could try to ****

give me space
is there any in this place

I'm trying to be nice
but your stabbing my back with a knife

how do I contain
and be nice to you simple brain

you degrade my intelligence
my memory of an elephant

you deteriorate my brain cells
to you its always "oh well"

all I want is
Space

Why do I throw away good advice,
Does my heart yearn to learn like a device.
Does it wish to know what it cant?
To hurt and cry to sing and chant?
What does it want acting like a fool?
She shall take a seat, right here, that stool.

"What do you want"
No reply,
just a sad look in her eyes.
She is lonely
But she is so loved?
What does she want?
Give her a shove.

Her lips are sewn up like that of a scare crow
Up and down in a pattern of twine
Shes been abused and a quieted
By what? Her mind.
She never speaks what's in her heart
She is flinching in fear
The love she felt tore her apart

She messed up, and it haunts her
Every sound, and noise
It reminds her
Of him

He is the reason
she is incapable of love.
He is the reason
She will never know it.

Stuck,
Pain,
Relief.
All I feel in this very moment,
And yet I don't know how you feel
In this very moment
How odd.
I wonder if it will be cold outside tommorrow?
But it might be very hot for you.
How odd.
We've never met
Most likely never will.
And yet somehow
I can imagine you
A faint vision.
No details
But all I know is that's you.
I like you.
No voice
No opion
But yet you influence me to do my best
Without saying a word
All you are is a concept
But to you so am I
How odd.
Thank you
Whoever you may be
Because you've inspired me to do great things
Just by being you
How odd.

I didn't think,
I could be okay.

I didn't believe,
I could be happy.

I didn't wish,
For someone new.

I didn't want,
To move on so quick.

I didn't have,
The the strength to carry on.


I didn't know,
You were the answer.

If I had wings, would I fly?
Leave everything and head for the sky

Abandon what was mine and see,
What life is like above me.

Or would I stay and remain near,
To the things I love and fear.

Watch everyone grow old with who I've been replaced with,
Or watch everyone cry over me and struggle in anguish

Or go the light and be reunited,
With all the people who I once ignited
If I had wings would I fly?
Leave everything and head for the sky

I hate myself.
Not physical me.
Or social me.
Mental me.
She loves to plan my down fall
And laugh at my defeat.
If only she knew she holds us together
Maybe she would stop tearing us apart
Shes constantly stabbing me
In places where I'm happy,
Shes hurting me. Shes hurting we.
If only she could see
That one day, because of her there could be no we.

Fill me up,
Pour me out.
My heart is yours,
I have my doubts.

I really love you,
And always will.
But my love,
It all hurts still.

The world will spin,
Like my brain.
Trying to leave,
In winter rain.

I knew you'd hurt me.
Once again,
But i love you.
my old friend.

Our passionate love,
is like a river.
Dried up now.
Only sorrow slivers.

I love you,
And always will,
But you dont
A bitter pill.

I've read the stories of people who have given up
Dont be discouraged things can always look up
But once you dip and you dip really low
Someone will notice but no one will know
You can go day by day and no one will see
That there is a battle you are tired of fighting
You've already lost is how it may seem
But trust me dear you are winning
By fighting your exhaustion with you tears
No one will see your sadness or fear
Just keep it up and you will see
That if no one notices then you are free
You cry for attention so someone will take your place
But you mustn't give up you've earned your space
You're doing it right
by living your life
We all make mistakes
This can be seen a space for you always will be

Yea so men ****,
And they are kinda lame.
But with my luck,
They're all the **** same.

Insensitive to how I feel,
stupid and useless.
Like shark bait on a reel,
I am temporary and placeless .

I am easily removed,
Happily I bet too.
I'm not some animal to be wooed,
Men are much like the flu.

men ****,
I hate men.

I shouldn't be frustrated.
I should not be mad.

But something inside me,
Tells me I am.

I've denied the feeling,
Whatever it is.

To try and be happy.
Shall I begin?

You met up with her,
You guys are just friends.

I trust your decisions,
To my very ends.

But something inside me,
Crawls to my head.

Starts complaining,
A small shallowly beg.

Get out I will say,
Every time!

But it tells me.
That you're not only mine?!

This creature comes,
Quite often I believe.

I goes by a name,
Jealousy.

But that's not the only name,
It goes by so many.

The green eyed like grass,
Somethimes even envy.

I despise it greatly,
If only I could see.

That this creature or....feeling,
Is a part...of me.

Words can be silent
Words can be bold
My head keeps spinning
A story untold

It makes these lies
I choose to believe
I mutter in anguish
Why is this me?

I hate everything
I think I'm just melodramatic
my head spins a web
And makes everything overly climatic

I'm hurting myself with my thoughts
Someone once told me
Thoughts never stop.

I seek you.
Through a forest of hollow dreams
I search desperately
Through holes in empty trees.

I panic
With out you here
I cry
In deepening fear.

I cant lose you.
I'll paint the lies.
And search the world,
Heaven, and skies.

The clouds the color of choked up grass
I don't believe I've ever ran this fast.

I'm bewildered in agony
As I scream.
And the possibilities
of what this means

I wake up yelling covered in fear.
It's nothing new
To no longer see you here.

But the pain still hurts
Like frozen deserts and glass
I don't know how
To find peace atlast