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Leigh Marie Dec 2016
you're the worst thing that has ever happened to my poetry
cause, I am not a poet
I mean
I can not call myself a poet but ****
with you on my mind, and in my heart
but not in my life,
can't help but want to write
I can't seem to tell the difference between
you and me
now and then
here and there
I mean
I can not find the words to write
can not make sense of what is goin' on
let alone put it to words
I am not a poet
and you are not a musician
we just are
alone, or together
we are
there is nothin' to define
and nothin' to write
but everything all the same

wanna tell you how I
cried today cause there are
little boys that can't be saved

why can't things be the same
I mean
why can't they go back
to the way we were
try everything again
being friends,
again
falling in love,
again
and this time,
not mess up cause
I messed up cause
you messed up

How's a
non- poet 'pposed to
figure out whats going on
and write about it
I mean
how am I 'pposed to
write to you
write you a come back letter
a I miss you letter
I mean
a text
cause you know we aren't
a generation of chivalry
you ne'er even gave me
something to hold on to
or let go of
cause you slipped right outa my hands
where'd you go
how am I 'pposed to
write bout you being here and gone
all at the same time
did you do this on purpose
stall my pen

can't even explain it to my
closest friends cause it
don't make sense
I mean
they don't see why I care
I don't see why I care

I know you're not far cause
you keep me close
but you sure as hell
ain't mine
don' know if you
e'er were or
will be
**** you really ruined
my writing
inspired by Sarah Kay's "Worst Poetry"
Leigh Marie Dec 2016
Tomorrow,
I leave
and dear
I'm afraid
that you
won't
miss me

Cause I
know I'll
think of
your guitar,
your hands
my hands
your laugh,
and dance

Cause I
know I'll
listen to
your music
when I'm
homesick
or else try
to remember
your eyes,
your words

But will you
miss my piano,
my hands
your hands
my laugh,
my car
will you phone me
just to hear
my voice again

Will we even
Say goodbye

Do we have to

Or have we
already
Leigh Marie Dec 2016
My dad loves me most when he's drinking
he cares about me transiently
so maybe thats why I
look for gyspy love
maybe I like the surprise of
not knowing if you'll love me tomorrow
or maybe it's just what
I deserve
Leigh Marie Dec 2016
why has it become
so incredulous to
believe in fate
I mean when I say
he's my soulmate
people look at me like
I'm helpless or
hopeless
when I'm really just
hopeful

Maybe its cause
I've felt God
when I touch him
or cause he's taught me
how to forgive like Christ
that is to say
only God himself could
bring us together
maybe not forever but
for now is enough 
 
To love is to
know God
and my God
I think I love you
He made us, and
saw that it was good
Leigh Marie Dec 2016
At the end of a long day
and night soaked in tears
its always you
that I find
myself searching for
hoping to see you
at the bottom of
my drink or
lighting up my phone

Nobody can ever match up
or stand up
to you
even though you have
not taught me what love looks like
instead what love feels like
that is,
you do not show me love or
hold it in the palm of your hand
I feel it when I sit across from you
and laugh
  Nov 2016 Leigh Marie
E. E. Cummings
i will wade out
                        till my thighs are steeped in burning flowers
I will take the sun in my mouth
and leap into the ripe air
                                       Alive
                                                 with closed eyes
to dash against darkness
                                       in the sleeping curves of my body
Shall enter fingers of smooth mastery
with chasteness of sea-girls
                                            Will i complete the mystery
                                            of my flesh
I will rise
               After a thousand years
lipping
flowers
             And set my teeth in the silver of the moon
Leigh Marie Nov 2016
Knotted hair tangling round my face
I finally learned to kneel in the sand
No more squatting:
embrace the grime,
feel alive,
build a sandcastle &
knock it down
dig a hole &
fill it in
Summer futility

This July,
I broke and
was punished for it
like waves scorning
the sand castle for shrinking into
the beach when the ocean comes pounding  
the little girls crying cause
her castle is gone

the little girl curses
the waves not the castle so
why cant you see how I crumbled:
washed away, not washed up
some days I wish I could sink
into the sand and listen to
the waves crash
forever

I can't stop thinking how
my body curved into itself
I screamed and cried -back rounded
like the curve of the waves that had beaten me
I pushed back and no one forgave me
Just wanted someone to rebuild me
and give me a moat this time but
instead I'm drowning
in myself

Alone at sea
I can't see the horizon
It feels like I am the wave
and the castle all at once
No body stays for
more than just a
crashing moment

I'm stuck alone
barely floating, nearly sinking
Just want to hit  the ocean floor where
water dances tango with the sandy floor
no destruction or fallen sand castles
just harmony
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