the tears will dry
the heartaches will fade
the pain will go away
time will slow down
and everything
will feel still
and you will feel at peace
I promise.

god I'm sad all the time

I don't want to be and I don't mean to be
but I am.

I feel it in my heart
and in the pit of my stomach.

The never ending sadness that just continues to consume me.

There are few moments
where the sadness disappears for just a while
but then it's back.

.. and
even
worse ..

your thoughts can flow a millions miles per hour
and suddenly it gets quiet.

a silence that eats your insides because you can't explain
the reasoning why.

you can try to choke out your words
but nothing comes out.

everything hurts
and you can't do a **** thing about it.

My hands are shaking
Tears run down my cheeks
How my body is aching
Feeling so defeat

Hold me closer to you
I can feel your heartbeat
If only you knew
How this feeling could be so sweet

Be with me now
It's me who should be afraid
I'm sorry for being so loud
I never meant to push you away

Too anxious to tell you
what's going on
I can tell though
this is what you want

I'm not running away
forgive me now
I'm begging you to stay
The words just won't come out

I kissed your lips laced with alcohol
and tasted the sweet sensation of
Nothingness and Regret.
The everlasting touch
that would release me from you.
Yet for some odd reason,
I still wanted more.