I think I've seen beauty, hoping that it's not a facade for trickery
Trying to attract what comes near from shocks of admiration, electricity

But that seems unlikely, for a beauty as that one to conspire such a conspiracy
For eyes give true character, as that is of truth and loyalty

As without speech, sometimes knowledge is hard to be known
But actions speak louder than words, the vagueness of the first statement clearly shown

That a glimpse of an eye, can see but to a mere moment
But the study of an action, can see the truth bestowed in it

I don't know why,
but it always starts with an invitation
to dinner.
Excitement always turns to dread
when I sit across from you at the table.
You fold your hands,
while I play with the table cloth.
I wait.
For those words
"we need to talk"
or
"there's something I need to tell you"
I know what follows after those words
A death of family or a friend
A cheating parent confession
Loss of a job
Yet another time we are forced to move to a new home
or the worst words
"it's not working out"
the same poor excuses pour out of your mouth
faster than the waitress can refill my beverage
so please,
don't ever ask why I cancel our "Dinner Plans"

If only you could look at me
They way i look at you
If only you could love me
The way i love you
If only you feel about me
The way i feel about you
If only i make you happy
The way you make me happy
If only you smile at me
the way i smile at you
If i only you want me
How much i want you
If only you desire me
How much i desire you
If only you were mine

She looks in the mirror
At the age on her face
"I wonder what he thinks
of me this way?"

She considers her weight
and the pores on her skin
She thinks out loud
"I don't deserve him."

She picks apart
the woman he loves
Separating her worth
from all that she does
              
He looks in her eyes
and caresses her face
He sees it glowing with love
and full of grace

 The lines on her face
  he views with pride
  Recounting the victories
  each time they've been tried

The weight that she carries
 is that of a mom
 Nothing's too heavy
 She just marches on

These bodies will perish
 and mirrors offer no truth
True love abides
 beyond the corridors of youth

  No, she doesn't deserve me
  Perhaps God can see
  Conceivably, one day
  I'll be as worthy as she

honestly for me, in the light of the day
its easy to act as if the pain has gone away
but when I sit by myself in darkness at night
holding that blade, wondering if they're all right
a ****, a *****, a liar, attention seeker, a ***
no one could ever love me, trust me I know
pushing me to my limit, making me cave
tracing scars, making them fresh, digging my grave
imagining the tears I'd shed if I knew how
wishing I had the strength to pretend I do, now
reaching out, but receiving no help anymore
hoping someone will notice my unlocked door
do you see me standing here crying out to you
do you hear my voice, its cracking, I'm through
waiting, begging, dying when I'm alone
why is it I have to do this on my own?
red lines bleeding out, white scars
the darkness isn't so bad, I can almost see the stars