What if I told you
I want to die?
That I'm tired of living,
of being alive?
What if I said
it gets worse at night?
The thoughts get louder
and everything seems wrong
What if I told you I lied
when I said I was fine?
When I said I'm fine, how are you,
I was actually crying on the inside.
What if I lied
and said everything is alright
No, I'm not crying,
I swear I'm fine.
What if I tried to take my life?
Would you send me to rehab?
Hoping the doctors would fix me,
and everything would be fine?
What if I told you hope is dumb?
That hope is a stupid thing to have
Because when I have hope,
everything falls apart.
What if I told you I lied, again, when I said I was better?
That I only said that so you wouldn't worry?
Well,
I did.
What if I said to you,
I've hated myself since the age of 9?
That I wish you could've helped,
before it was too late?
What if I succeeded in killing myself?
I doubt anyone would cry.
Would you even care,
If I took my own life?
My first poem. Thanks for reading... xoxo - Avery