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Kushal Aug 2023
The lights have run their wick.
The hands of the clock turn
Yet they weigh no bearing.
Eternity could pass in the darkness.

Where have I gone...
That there is naught to guide me?

Far from home...
I dream of meals surrounded by warmth.
Kushal Jul 2023
I think back on my childhood.
Times that we're still good,
Before they switched it up,
Like, "Now it's time for adulthood."

Spent 18 years behind a desk,
Told to play at break,
Now life feels unrelated, and it feels like a **** waste.

It isn't useless, it just isn't right.
Train me to throw fists,
Then toss me into a knife fight.

What'd you prepare me for?
I still struggle with my taxes,
I got a degree, but it feels like I'm still stuck with all the masses.

After all these years,
It feels like I was taught wrong,
Guided down a path that my heart and soul didn't sit right on.

And every now and then
I start to fight back,
But no one likes it when you start to vary off the track.
They pushback
Like, "No, not that".
But I am not you.
So, **** that!
And I struggle but you can't see it though.
Always talk about me like I'm a lazy bloke,
Say I'm part of the lazy folk,
But your path to happiness,
Is my ******* hell road.

I think back on my childhood.
Times that we're still good...

At least, that's how it felt back then...
Kushal Jul 2023
For the longest time it's felt like I'm drowning.
I've kept swimming.

This isn't where I'd like to take my last breath.

It angers me that I struggle to fight the waves.
And sometimes, all feels lost.
Yet...
Whether through ego, anger, denial, or the instinct to survive,
I cannot accept an end like this.
My lungs are not yet out of breath.
Kushal Jul 2023
This kingdom of mine is cast in shadow,
Ruined by the sight of a light that once was.

The jester rambles on with has tales.
None bring smiles,
Not even to himself.

The king sends his men to war.
Battles fought with little purpose in victory.

The people suffer.
Lost and without guidance,
They lack even the will to fight.

This kingdom of mine is cast in shadow,
Ruined by the sight of a light that once was.

I wish I knew how to rule.
Kushal Jul 2023
Woe is me.
Oh, where is me?
Out of sight and gone with the breeze.

Woe is me.
Oh, where is me?
Danced on off into distance,
Your wonder has taken you far from home.

Woe is me.
Oh, where is me?
How far come,
How far gone.

Home...
Now a mirage under desert sun.
Woe is me.
Oh, where is me?

I think it's time to head back.
Kushal Jul 2023
Dissecting the world.
Eyes like hands,
Do the work of the mind.

Fearful of tremors.
Thoughts unchecked leave one unsteady.
Worry with every shake,
And eternity expands from a moment.

The hand cannot be stayed.
The eyes cannot be closed.

What medicine quells,
When the eyes glare at themselves?
Kushal Jun 2023
The Journey of the Traveler,
Wandering with eager eyes.

Boundaries matter not,
Neither in earth nor sky.

There are no "End"s.
The destination is not what's sought.

Purpose is hard found on a map.
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