i think about what happens if
someone really special
came into my life.
maybe not just someone special, but,
making friends as well.
we might have a small connection,
whether it would be similar
hobbies, tastes, interests,
whatever, same thing,
and we would be really comfortable
with each other.
we would just have a good time
talking to one another.
but there would always be a time
where i would get too comfortable.
a bit too personal.
i would keep bringing up my insecurities,
a bit of my past,
my bad habits,
and the fears that i have
that relate to the world we all live in.
i guess you can say that
turning just a regular conversation
to a therapy session
would be one of my bad habits.
but thinking about it,
i forget that everyone
has their own weaknesses,
and there's going to be a point in time
where we're going to
open up to them about it.
yes, i understand that some people
would like to hide certain problems to themselves
which i still have a hard time trying to do,
but at the end of the day,
we're going to show other people
our weakness at some point.
and once i tell the other person
my weaknesses, my demons,
i would always beat myself up
and punish myself
that i had lost another opportunity
of making a new friend.
but really, it's them to decide
whether they want to accept
my flaws or not.
you either stay friends with me
and accept me,
no matter what mistake i make,
or leave and go meet someone new.
that is all up to you.
your choice.
a life lesson that i can't please anybody and that i will always find people that can love me for me.