You say you love me
But I still just feel empty
So what do I do?

Do your legs ever hurt
After running away
From all those who care about you?

Do your arms ever hurt
From pushing away
All those who desperately want to love you?

i'm nothing.
why am i here?
will i ever be okay?
just breathe, levi.
why i am so useless?
nothing.
nothing.
nothing.

there was no other way to say it.
i'm merely just another blade of grass.
i was once told that i'm a background character in my own life,
since then i haven't really spoken the same,
since then i haven't really breathed the same.
i know it's the truth
and i know i do it to myself,
for my hobbies include trying to disappear and trying to mold myself into someone else.
there are times where i question if i was ever happy at all.
this growing sadness surrounds me and leaves me with dark circles and unwanted, racing thoughts.

there are drops of Jupiter
in your hair
and
laughing jewels trickling
out your eyes
a harem of moons
hanging from
your pretty ears
constellations your
background music

even when i look at your
night face,
comfort and in peace
i am reminded that
yes,
even the largest of bodies
can be coaxed into their
loving orbit
the lord of worlds
fits inside your
smooth palms
and cancer
is surmountable.

You say you hate everything about yourself,
But I find myself lost in you.
Even if I'm nowhere near,
I always rush to pick up when your call comes through.
I only want to write about your voice right now.
Because when I'm flooded in the dark,
When I'm weighed down by the toxins in my heart,
I forget everything the moment you start talking.
It's not really how it sounds, or what you say...
I can't describe it,

It just makes me feel this way.

Comforted. Soothed. At home.

I could listen to you go on all day.

I could name all the things I love about you;
Your eyes. Your smile. Your wit.
The way you always feel things so intensely.
The way you don't know when to quit.
But right now...I only want to think about your voice.

It's the only part of you I can have.

i danced all night to songs that made my heart feel young again.
seeing the sun go up as i cried tears of pure happiness.
i like being alone like this sometimes,
i can see myself alive when i'm alone like this.
hearing their voices sing,
hearing the instruments made my knees feel like jelly.
i danced all night,
heart filled with euphoria.

I see you standing there
I can see the pain masked by a smile
I can see how broken you are

I want to help you
I want to make you feel wanted
I want to make you happy

But I don't know how
I don't know what to do
I don't know how to act

I wish I could help you
I want to help you
I can help you

I've been through this
I know how this works
I know how I got through this

Maybe I can heal those scars on your wrist
I just want you to open up
I need you to open up

I know that it is hard
I understand what this means
I might not understand completely

I can try to understand
I will understand
I just need you to trust me

Please
Let Me
Help You

Don't
Shut Me
Out