Scene #1 / Take #10 / ACTION!

Dont go, she says;
on the floor now crying,
simply implying she can be loved.
C U T!
He made a mistake. All it takes is a re-cast.
Cast her away,
  so  f a r    a w a y  .

Her lines are easy;
always pleading, cold, and bleeding-
never leading off script.

Scene #1 / Take #12 / BREAK

It'll all blow over;
icy wind over shoulders-
blowing over.
Rehearse. Converse.
Get Ready for another try.

Scene #1 / Take #15 / STOP

Stop acting, stop reading, and start seeing-
This love isn't enough,
far too tough on the heart;
real stress, real scars, real hurt.
Dont go! she blurts-
Silence, only hurt.

    He's so f a r   a w a y . .

Your shadow has fallen over this place
like the plague.
The chandeliers cower at your advent,
collapsing atop this innocent crowd;
yet the violins still play.

Your presence ensues consternation.
Who's next?
Who's time is it?

It is I from which your invitation has been sent.
I am elated you could make it.

My mask is you,
with rose patterns aligned,
a gown to match,
with a bone breaking corset.
From my painted lips,

Will you save me this dance?

Face to face, chest to chest,
force each breath from my lungs.
Twirling now to my sounds,
I follow your lead.
Dip me back into your arms, my sweet,
finally reaping me with a kiss.

*You are my only love.

and it took me some time
to realize that i was dating
a boy
not a man
that i wasn't looking
for a boyfriend
i was looking for a dad
hold on a second
its not what it seems
theres no oedipus complex
this isn't ******-y
this is a girl
who can never love a man
this is a girl
who never had a dad
this is a girl
that wants love-
the pure kind-
the lets go for icecream at 3am
lets go to the park
lets name all the animals at the zoo
this is the girl looking for protection
by sticking her head in the cage
her safety net
is a beard and colored eyes
and it took her time to realize
that every boy that smiles at you
doesn't mean well
and when they say they love you
don't think they will hesitate before they leave you
because they won't
don't
be fooled by their smiling eyes
girl you need to realize
your father loved you
and he meant well
still
he left and these boys no they don't love you the way he did
they won't save you from the demons in your head
baby girl
still
lie still and know
that "boy" isn't a safe word
and "man" doesn't mean love
and that the bridge between those who stay
and those who leave
is jammed with those
who said they'd be
here.
stop looking for a man.
stop looking for a dad.
you-
you
are enough.

Found myself crying
Holding your book
Reminding me that i belong to you

You'll never be her

She was my first. She was my first date, my first love, the first one I wanted to build a home and have a family with.

Her face was the first to meet my family. Heck, she became part of our family. She was the first girl my mother loved for me.

She too was my first heartbreak; the first one to build me up and break me down. Her knowledge of me was the same as my knowledge of myself.

But she too will never be you.

She'll never be the one who picked me up when I thought I was never going to get back up.

No matter what she does, she'll never be able to love me as much as you do. She'll never know me more than I know myself like you do. She could never make me realize that I'm worth more than I think I am. She could never make me feel any happier and more contented like you could.

My love, know that you should never compare yourself to my past. There's a reason why she's there and you're here with me right now. The reason is because you are the one I love.

You are a gift from above. You are my present. Everyday I pray that you remain my present when tomorrow comes, and God knows I would do anything to keep you.

So do not bother yourself about it. Shed your worries away, for as much as you'll never be her, she will never be you.

loving you is a war
i never thought i would fight in.
but here i am,
on my knees,
hands in the air,
yelling of my surrender
to you.

Below the hanging tree I wept
Remembering the past.
There was a secret I still kept
Or – it kept me aghast.
A secret so ingrained in me,
An ache, a pain so deep,
A nightmare all day long for years
I could not fall asleep.

Beside the hanging tree I crept
My world – a shrunken hiss…
That fateful night I found the cure
Was in the air I kissed.

Beneath the hanging tree I dreamt
Of stranger things to come.
But all my dreams were swiftly swept
With shafts of morning sun.

Behind the hanging tree I stepped
And took the leap of faith.
And now I know you are to come
To this most sacred place.

The memory of ones we lost
Will never fade away
And neither will our love for them –
Not for a single day.

We might seem peaceful, fair enough,
But we have shown our teeth.
When freedom cried and duty called
We chose to clench our fists.

With every step along the way,
With every drop of blood
We learnt there was a price to pay.
We hardened our hearts.

With every cut and every bruise
And every shot we took
Our numbers grew, so long the queues
That everywhere you looked
You’d see the mothers and the sons,
The daughters and the dads,
Their fiery eyes, their daring hearts,
Their disregard for death.

With every blast and every hit
And every shrapnel piece,
The hopes went high, the dreams grew big –
Our dreams of lasting peace.

But first there was a war to win,
An ego to submit,
Old gods to cast aside for good
And fears to defeat.

A score of scores to be paid off,
A destiny to meet,
Old shackles to be shaken off,
A brave new world to greet.

And long and hard the battle went,
The toll is still unknown…
But to this day we reap the fruit
Of seeds of love we’ve sown.
…
And now, around the hanging tree
We join our hands
As we recall what made us free,
What brought peace to our lands.

I smile as I linger on –
A minute, maybe five
As I recall the war we fought,
The sacrifice, the lives.

I weep no more, so wild and free,
And all I ask of thee:
Are you, are you
Coming to the tree?