I am Strong

I am  Powerful

I am Brave

I am Strong

I am Powerful

I am Brave

**I am Strong

I am Powerful

I am Brave

I kind of feel sad today.
Doctor says I have depression, and well...I believe him.
My dad thinks its just for attention
attention, uh?
I always feel ******.
It's an everyday part of my life now.
See, today someone stole my laptop charger at school,
and my project got stolen, too.
I've never cut in my life.
I've never done drugs.
I've drank a few times, but who hasn't?
I think I'm suicidal.
But I can't wrap my head around death.
It scares me.
So instead of dying,
I tear myself to pieces wishing for it to come,
but never speeding up the process
I feel ******.
I said that before.
Like, I follow a Shepard.
I'm a little lamb
but my blood seeps through my white wool.
Until eventually,
this little lamb is killed.
****
I'm sorry.
I ramble
I never make sense.
And they wonder why I am suicidal.
Last night,
there was a party.
Instead of going,
I bounced a tennis ball back and forth against my wall.
fun, right?
I hate the world,
but I'm scared to leave it.
Doctors don't help,
mothers don't help
Friends don't help
being single sure as hell doesn't help
I just feel ******.

I'm happier,
I promise.
I'm doing better,
okay?
You don't have to this,
please.
I'm sorry that I'm hurting,
and I know,
you are too.
But what I don't understand,
is what I mean to you.
You say I'm your best friend,
but you don't act like it.
That night we hung out,
you made me feel things again,
and as much as I hated that,
I loved it all the same.
I'm happier,
I promise.
Now that you're not sad,
even though,
it hurts me,
I love seeing you smile again.
I care about you,
in more ways than one.
I can't escape it,
I wish I could.
Believe me,
I wish I could.
I'm happier,
I promise.
Even though I'm lying,
I know it's what you want to hear,
so I'll just fake it.

ven·det·ta
venˈdedə/
noun
noun: vendetta; plural noun: vendettas
a prolonged bitter quarrel with or campaign against someone.

You are a beast,
a monster,
an evil soul,
with an ugly vendetta
and a heart of stone.

You play games with people's minds,
use them like pawns in your world,
but the thing you don"t realize is
I'm not just an ordinary girl.

I'm strong and powerful,
brave and mighty.
My heart is gold,
my soul
beaming.

I am your undoing.
The end to your games.
I stand against you,
my army behind me.
Countless soldiers
ready for battle.

You can't win against us;
our cause is just,
to strike down the evil,
the monster
the beast.

And the beast,
my dear,
is you.

LEAVE. ME. ALONE.