A shriek resounding from inside,
Filling up cold deluded transgressions.
Aggressively clawing at a reality unsolicited.
Slowly the burning starts to reach closer to the core,
the final chapter about to unfold into a hollow scream.
Echoing in desperation to be heard for some resolution,
a lament looming over all that was left.

The shuffling of feet against cold marble slowly come to a halt,
and came the realization to what has become now a dream.
It was a rush of rejoice washed over a heated forehead filled with aching sighs.
The undying feeling floats against the surface,
as a reminder to the haunting memory of hope.
The foolish thought of a victory owned against a done deed.

Once more her legs give out as she can feel her body heavy with defeat.
A struggle shows against the creases of her soft tired face.
As if escaping the last fight her lips curve once more into a grin,
cracking slowly and faltering to an emotionless line.
Her lids shut and her head lulls back as she feels the soft breeze against her back.
The final realization of what was to evolve finally hit her ragged frame,
and she let go of the her convictions to shrivel back to her old ways.

Draw the line.
Keep telling yourself you know where your feet tread.
What if that fragile balance fractures?
Which side would you choose?
Would you handle going against yourself? Against the very vibrations passing through your body?
Or would you risk shredding what little peace of mind is left?
The cold metallic feel brushes against your hands. Do you pull the trigger?
I can't contain the possibilities, especially when I reminisce.
That night I ran, barely dodging scattered wooden chairs.
An echo of your temptations beconed me further.
How thrilling to live in between the creases of each lie.
How ******* to let the chills of danger spread a road on your skin.
To let those words touch my lips as they splatter out and run with the wind; completion.
An affair of love with the more plausible mistake.
You reek of danger but my heart found a home in fear, and so you must taste sweet.
I have found the cure to failure; throw yourself at an inevitable loss.
I want to hurt, shred and slash.
I want to rule and to rule,
my kingdom on pillars of empathy and psychosis.
Keep your enemies close, but keep your addictions closer

I watched the swell of my ******* rise and fall with each breath, and I remembered how your eyes traced the same movement.
I absentmindedly ran my fingers along the flare of my hips, and remembered how white your knuckles were as you held on to the same flesh.

I couldn't fathom how you saw my rebirth as a slow death.

I was a woman in your arms, the flushed
state of my skin was the secret to my depths.
The breaths I released were tainted by my strung vocal chords, a hymn of truth.
Each drop of sweat that descended the nape of my neck were pearls of my wisdom.
When my toes curled it was a sign; the alignment of planets.
The goosebumps that rose on my skin were the explosion of supernovas.
The sparkle in my eyes told of humble mischief.

Only what I saw in your eyes was a distortion.
The alarm on your features whispered of disappointment.
Your eyes witnessed filth, but I smelled the scent of gardenias.
Your skin was repelled by disgust, but I tasted sweetness on my lips.

I finally realized it, your mind was woven by our culture of shame.
Subconsciously your thoughts wrapped around sin and the desecration of purity.
I let you inside, cradled your needs and desires.
I basked in the rush and desperation of your movement.
But you saw this ritual as a sacrifice, and you held the knife to split me open on your malicious alter.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but you seemed to have gone blind.

The indulgence of my body and soul was wasted.
It was wasted on you who clung to ignorance,
you who was submerged in the fragility of your ego and superiority.
I would not let you sully me, or the beauty of that moment.
I would hail my strength, and scream out my confidence.
I would relish in my femininity,
for I am a woman and I would never be ashamed.

I tell myself I'm wiser than all these women.
A soothsayer with a mind of diamonds, crafted by pressure.
Until I realize my mistake, a mistake you inspired.
I thought you were my only regret; only I don't regret you.
I regret how I blame what I have become on you.
Do you feel an invisible weight, or the noose that connects us?
Delusions pile up to create the pillars of my empire.
A crown of thorns, and a belt of testosterone.
I carry these keepsakes like a trophy, or fingers to a serial killer.
They are proof I have won this war, it is a war that festers only in my mind.
I have sacrificed my flesh so you can never claim the pride of doing it yourself.
I lay in sheets with my head spinning, the smell of sweat and **** nestled in the pillows.
I smirked as I repeated these words to myself, "Here's to you, love."
My body became accustomed to these ritualistic sacrifices, and revenge vanished leaving only a bittersweet taste in my mouth.
I long for the day my body surrenders my heart, when my soul and body finally meld and my thoughts don't stray to you.
For the day my lips utter a name reverently instead of an empty moan.
Eventually all I can hope is for this man to cover these scars like a tattoo; a tattoo of ivy twisting until they reach the depth of my soul.

You observe.
I know what you see.
It's all perfectly visual.
Your eyes low to the ground, they catch on the tip of her heel.
You follow the curve of the red sole to reach her thin ankle.
Something possesses you to look further up, and you unintentionally trace the expanse of her languid legs.
Suddenly her eyes are staring back at you, and all you can do is instantly turn away.
Something you saw pulls you back, and you look.
Her lips are red, darker than blood and her eyes remain in your direction.
She removes the cigarette from her lips, and the look in her eyes almost throws you off your chair.
You train your eyes to look straight ahead, but when you close your eyes an image flashes.
An image of her lips pressed against the concrete.
You open your eyes only to redirect them in her direction.
Her black rimmed eyes with irises that seem desolate, are redirected away from you.
When you close your eyes another image flashes.
An image of her dead eyes staring up at you, almost pleading.

There's lightning outside, while on the inside I dream of the ways you can light me up.
My thoughts keep drifting to your silent smirk, the sure sign of a winner.
I seem to have stumbled my way into your headlights.
I had no intention of losing until you came into focus, until you owned the game.
My ego keeps slipping through my fingers, an indication of lost time.
My bare feet long to dance on cold ceramic tiles, to breathe in endless plastic roses.
You see my luck seems to always slip away from me.
One was the father of a child, forever bound to his little girl.
The second was bound to another, as if they were only meant for each other.
The third was my pitfal, he was all is fair in love and war until someone's heart was ripped apart.
Now I have nothing to lose, because he is a lone howler and his heart only loves the open road.
I realize that eventually none of it really matters as long as I can feel the pressure from your fingers.
All I need is to admit defeat, God had dealt me a losing hand.
Now I stay up late chain-smoking, and hoping for some solution.
My heart beats on a path my mind can't control and my feet have become tangled in these threads