Love;
It's one of those things where if you have it
You know it for sure
And if you're not sure, you don't

A while ago I gave up on love
Because every time I got it, and thought I had it
Some one very close to me came and took it away
And I am left without it

At first I was doing well
I would not fall for it
I would see a nice guy, but would not buy it
Or, a boy would like me, but I'd avoid it

But now I've fallen in to it, the well of love
Oh, how deep is this well, with walls so wet I can't climb up
At last I splash in a pool of water
A pool of love

And in this pool I'm drowning
Now I am floating, flowing down a river
I am spit out at an oasis, a beautiful oasis
But now I'm breathing, even under the water

And now I am swimming, I am in control
I now see the way out, but I dare not go near it
For it is a desert out there, dry and lifeless
A desert with no water, no love

This love, I feel it
I know not if he knows it but I feel it
It's warmth, it's life
I want to surround myself in it

I dare not lose it
Too many times I have lost it
It is mine! I will hold on to it
No one will take it from me, lest they die!

Now I believe in love
And it's all thanks to him
He unburied my love
Now I love him


#11_11/28/2011

His smile, how I love it
That very smile that always brings me up
The one that always lights the place
The on that clears the darkness when on his face

His hands, those soft hands
Those strong and hard working hands
The warm fingers on those hands
Oh, how they make my heart dance

His arms, his legs
How strong yet so graceful
They move with such beauty
They make my body want to dance

But those eyes, how I love them
Through them I can see him
His soul, it burns of umber
That beautiful, beautiful burnt umber

And through those beautiful eyes
I see his bright, happy soul
The one that lights up my soul
And causes it to burn purple

Those dark brown eyes, how I love them
The ones that always seem to smile
Even when his lips do not, they smile
They always smile

And his soul, that strong soul
That merry soul, that calm soul
The one that is seldom flustered, or frustrated
Of at least has a hard time showing so

Those dark brown eyes, the windows to his soul
Those dark but shining eyes
Those joyful smiling eyes
Those dark brown eyes, how I love them


#9_11/15/2011

You, young man, have scarred me
Everywhere I go I wear this scar you gave me
Not physically but mentally you hurt me
And I hate it

I will never forget what you did to me that day
You showed me things I need not know
And told me things I need not hear
they’ll never leave my eye, my ear

You don’t know how those things changed me
Or how I go everywhere fearing it will happen again
And even though I love you, you scare me
All guys scare me

Not only does it hurt
But nay can I share it
I never share it, because I'm afraid to
And even if I did it wouldn’t help

I wish you never did it
I hope you still don’t do it
Not only does it hurt me but you as well
You hurt yourself

So I hope you see all you did to me
And all you put upon me;
And you may ask what you did to me
The way you touched me, you scarred me



#8_8/28/2011

So it's your fourteenth birthday and you must compose a list
A list of anything you want as a birthday gift
But what if the thing you want is really hard to say
The one and only thing you want on this birthday

Most girls my age might want an ipad or a phone
New makeup, a Nintendo or a laptop of their own
But the only thing I want, it would forever last
The one simple thing in which is from my past

All I want is him. Oh, how I miss him
Late June marked three years since I've seen him
It's been too long we've been apart
I want him, yet distance keeps us apart

Oh him, the one. What love shared
In my head I felt he cared
He made me laugh, and never cry
Never could I say goodbye

So can you see, just try to see
That the one thing you can give to me
Though he stands alone on my list
I never got my birthday wish



#7_8/9/11

Do you know me?
I know you
You are the same stuck-up person
you’ve always been
You think you’re perfect,
Always right and better than everybody else
You might not think you think that
But you do

You think you can never slip up
But if you do, you’re still perfect
You try to make everything about you
Even when you know it’s not

You say bad things about people
To make yourself look good
And you have no idea
How many hearts you’re hurting

So how much do you know about me?
I doubt it’s very much
You know nothing
So I’m going to help you out

You know those things that you do and expect me to do but I don’t
It’s not because I’m rebellious
But because it’s hard
You have no idea how hard it is for me

You have no idea that I cry myself to sleep every night
Thinking about what you said to me
How you treated me
What you did to me

You have no idea who I am, or what I’m like
Because I never get my thoughts around
Whenever I’m angry, or have a problem
I’m forced to hold back my words, because I have to behave

So after all that
After everything I told you
Do you know me like I know you?
No. You don’t



#6_7/30/2011

I hate being sweet
‘Cause on the inside I am not
It’s like using sweet caramel
To cover something spicy hot

Inside I’m like a furnace
I’ve got an attitude
I wish I could be selfish, idle
Or sometimes even rude

No matter how hard I try
I’m always just too kind
It’s like someone went before my birth
And preprogrammed my mind

If I were angry, sad or scared
You would never know
My emotions are a part of me
That I can never show

I hate being shoved
But either way I let it go
I hate to share my stuff
But I just really can’t say no

Letting people cut in front of me
Though I got there fair-n-square
I just keep quiet and pretend
I was never there

The Bible says I should love
Everyone like I love me
So I guess being nice
Is just a thing that makes me me

I guess that I’ll just **** it up
And go back to being nice
And hope that things are better for me
Later on in life


#5_7/18/2011

Love

Out of everything we’d want or need

Love will not forsake us

Everyone is loved; God loves us



Love flows

Like a river love flows

Ongoing, never stopping

Like a river love flows



Water

Love is like the water

Going down a river, a long, long river, is water

Never stopping, ‘till cold, ‘till frozen



Water moves

Swishing, splashing, vile eroding

Carrying that evil thing until it hits the sea

And we don’t know how far away that is going to be



Water falls

Filling every river, rain falls from the sky

If the rain stops the river runs dry

And not a thirsty sole can drink



But somewhere out there, there is water

And there is love

In which that thirsty sole will find, intake, and cherish

And every thirsty sole can drink



For there is always water, and there is always love

Though you might think it’s there

Love is plentiful, love is good

And God is good and God is love, and God loves us



#4_5/24/ 2011