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AWURAA Dec 2
Today marks the 2nd Anniversary since my baptism in my Lord Jesus Christ.

I am grateful God has brought this far,
I remember tripping on the night of my baptism.

I was filled with regret and shame because I had just consecrated myself in His spirit.

Since then God has shown me that this walk is a journey, my tounge may speak death at times but it is His word and His spirit who renew my words.

My thought life may contradict His truth but I will, and I am constantly transformed by renewing of my mind by His word.

I am changed because I choose to not remain the same.
I changed because the public proclamation of my faith placed a covering over my being.

So here's to you Lord, the one who has carried me through, I thank you...
2nd Anniversary.
AWURAA Dec 1
"God, don't give up on me yet, I know
  I'm not your best bet, but I'm trying,
  don't give up on me yet."

I know God will never give up on me, He will never leave me, nor forsake me...

I see my actions of my hands and hear the thoughts in my mind, the lusts of my heart and even in all of this filth, my God tells me that I am free to remain in Him because he delights in me.

So to you Lord I am faithful, others would not accept as I was, but you did; and you do.

You accept me as I am and you renew me in your spirit.

You will never give up on me.
Thank you my dependable God,
and thank you for all that is to come.
My dependable God.
AWURAA Dec 4
If I had a son, I would name him Eliakim, so that the Lord may establish him in His ways, raising him up to be a mighty man of valour who seeks after the Lord's heart in all things.

If I had a son, he would be named Eliakim so that the Lord may raise him up in a time of frivolity and purify him in the land he sits in.

If I had a son, I would name him Eliakim so that he would leave a good example for his brothers and sisters who will come after him.
- To Elikem S.
AWURAA Oct 10
I want to be more free in the way I live my life.
Bubble.

For so long I have lived in a bubble, refusing to explore because it was dangerous or it was disrespectful, oh, because it was  ' I said so.'

I want to be more free in the way I live my life.

I want to explore, I want to write, I want to experience, I want to live with all my might.
I need to live with all my might.
Break down the concepts that were ingrained in me.

Yes marriage is great,
But why should it be the centre of my life?
Yes money grants freedom but why must I follow material wherever it walks?

I'm bursting this bubble and escaping this mindset.

I want to be more free in the way I live my life.
AWURAA Sep 24
Why is the phrase I'm going to **** myself used so leniently?

Is it not a statement that carries weight? or is it just a jovial way to deal with feelings and move on from it?

Why can’t we be thankful for the life we have, the breath we breathe?

Let us PAUSE for a moment.







The breath that you have today is the same breath that someone’s soul is craving for.

The day that you are living in is the same day someone else was not permitted to see.

The experiences that you have experienced today are the same experiences somebody wished to see one last time before the plug was pulled.



Please, be grateful for your life and what it entails because everything that has breath must praise the Lord.  

It is our praise to him that makes us more aware of our lives.
AWURAA Dec 7
I am getting lost in a world I do not belong in.

Do you think they will know that I am not one of them?

But what if I am one of them?

Will they ever know?
AWURAA Nov 11
They come to me, streaming in drop by drop,
so I collect them all, trying to keep them whole,
comforting them with words I wish to hear,

Lacing my words with encouragement,
so others may see the best in me,
but what they see is a character of fictioniality,
a mask woven from gentle phrases,
stitched with threads of borrowed grace.

Yet beneath, a voice still echoes, softly,
of the solace I chase.

The breath of the almighty whispers, telling me to hold on,
giving me more to believe in.

I offer words like fragile offerings,
each a delicate vessel, wondering,
do they bear my truth or simply reflect my hopes?

In this intricate dance,
I stitch together fragments of dreams and fears,
crafting a tapestry that reveals and conceals
a symphony of whispered encouragement,
yet beneath it all, a quiet yearning lingers,
seeking the voice that truly understands.

The breath of the divine fills the spaces in between,
urging me onward, promising that even in silence,
I am profoundly heard.
Written by Asher & AWURAA.
I would like to say a big thank you to @Asher who gave me the first opportunity to work with a talented poet.
Inspired by the words of William Wordsworth.
AWURAA Dec 1
He doesn't complete Her.
She doesn't complete Him.
They do not complete each other.
Only God completes us from within.
AWURAA Nov 6
There is a burden in my heart, there is a wallowing in my spirit, there is a heaviness in my heart.

I want to do more in you lord, I need to do more in you Lord, I find it hard to let go of my desires and walk to you.

But with the little strength I have, I'll call upon your name and I shall be saved, I'll lean into you for help and you'll be my guide .

I come to you lord.
My heart needs you.
My strength grows weak without you.
I know your strength is made great in my weakness, so I come to you father. Please help me.
AWURAA Nov 7
It has honestly gotten to the point where you are no longer my one desire.

God is.

It has honestly gotten to the point where I just want to be friends with you.
Just to know you as you and not the man in my mind, I am breaking  you down you know, you know that fiction I made of you in my mind, the fantasy I would call on to rock me to sleep or to comfort me when I would refused to go to my heavenly Father.

Lie by lie, fiction by fiction, lust by lust, I am breaking the false imitation I made of you.
Demolishing it till the foundation is clear.

But now I want to know you, talk to you, make you laugh knowing
I honestly do not have feelings for you but only Philia love towards you.
I honestly want to understand your actions and why you are who you are.

I don't like you I just want to know you.
I no longer lust after you, but I now see you as the human God made you to be.
Processing of my thoughts so far.
Lust≠ Love
Volume 4
AWURAA Dec 3
No, but imagine I came face to face with the people who read my poems; the people who saw my heart and unveiled emotions.

Imagine if the people who read my poems where given a bird's eye view into my life's totality.

Would you love me with every inch of your soul as I have relinquished the rights to my vulnerability by letting you see me in my full entirety?

No, but imagine if you saw the one I had written about , would you know it was him?
Would you think back to the pain in my poems and along with the bird's view of my life and know that it was he who I was talking about?

No, but imagine if you read my poems and it left a mark on your heart.
But with the same pained tears laced in my words, you tore the heart of  another being's child.

Imagine if my life comes to an end all that was marked was wistful words with no true meaning.
AWURAA Dec 4
Eyes meet,
heart fleets.

Just for a short moment.

The ambiguity of my eyes locking with those of stranger is one that I can never get used to.

What was laced in your eyes, what did you want to tell me that you were too scared to say?

Was it the colour of my eyes on warm summer's day,
or the beauty my child's smile in a rainy may?

Was it your desire to walk up to me and say hello,
or your sudden interest in the confidence I walked with?

Eyes meet,
hearts fleet,
the awkwardness that comes with knowing you have met eyes with a person you were not meant to be looking at,
the pain that stings in your heart after locking eyes with the one you owe an apology to because of your selfish morality.

Eyes meet and suddenly flutter away, look of annoyance plastered on my sister's face, saying, "can I help you?"
"Why are you staring at me?"
"fleets"- I use this word like fleeting, as in "for a fleeting moment."
AWURAA Oct 9
I'm renouncing the pain I spoke over myself.
I'm renouncing the hatred I spoke into this family.
the hatred spoke into those of my past,
the Boy who made me realise I was filled with lust,
I am renouncing the words that I spoke and listened to that reduced and reduce my self esteem.
I am renewing my mind with The word.
I am renewing my mind with His love.
I am allowing Him to work through me.
I am forgetting the past, refusing to ponder on old history.
Please carry me through Lord, increase this capacity.
I am so used to ignoring my feelings that accepting them make me feel like I am  wrong.
So peace to my heart.
Joy to my mind.
Salvation to my soul.
The lord  in my spirit, He alone makes me whole.
Please teach me how to navigate and accept these feelings Lord, you gave them to me for a reason.
AWURAA Sep 17
Because it's that easy, it's that easy to let go of the reality you have conformed to.

Let go and let God.
What does that even mean?

So I drop the label.
I drop the band.

*

They call us idols.
Do you know how hard it is to forget what you have worshipped?
Why do you think it was hard for me to not worship Him in those few times I could?
Because he is embedded in me.

Those sounds that we have sung, dances we have preformed, I have become alert of those people who worshipped us because in doing that they worshipped him.
The one we sung to, the one we served.
The lullabies he loved, the sensuality they adored.

We became figments of their imaginations, roleplays that they could call on to make them sleep, we have become a game that they mentally switched on and off when they wanted to.
Their desire is to switch me on when they want to zone out and switch me off when they need to come back to reality.

For my body to be abused in their minds.

But I am worth more than that.

I too am a man.
I too am a son.
A brother.... A friend.

I am not a prized trophy.
A statue of sensuality for all to see.

...

I too am a child of God.
AWURAA Sep 17
Stray kids, baby sheep who have gone astray.
Jesus is The shepherd and we his people are The sheep.
Bangchan, Felix, Hyunjin, Han, IN, Seungmin, Leeknow, Changbin.
All sheep who have gone astray from the shepherd ; stray sheep that lead more sheep away form The shepherd.

Baby sheep that is what a kid is.
The equivalent of a child in terms of sheep.

Stray kids are children who have gone astray from their father- his love and his care for them.

It's crazy that this is what these children of God are being called.

Before, Bangchan who God calls by name Christopher (bearer of Christ)
worshiped God in his monthly music listening...
This was unheard of in the Korean entertainment industry, I had never seen nor heard of anything like that before.

It wasn't a regular thing but it was something that happened enough for me to recognise.
The one who has been called to bear Christ still wants Christ.

He has never forgotten about the shepherd.

Alas.

There must come a time where the kid thinks of the days he was not lost... in the care of the shepherd where he could constantly see the shepherd, he doesn't realise that the shepherd is still looking out for him.


The shepherd watches over him daily but he respects The kids decision to go astray and so patiently waits for him to return.
And so patiently waits for them to return.

Christopher has been called to bear Christ in all things, in all that he does.

And even in the short moments that he did bear Christ, those were  moments of awe, moments of clarity and peace.

This is a call to the Bearers of Christ.
Please come back and bear Christ.
AWURAA 3d
There is no God vs Man because,
‘God chose things the world considers foolish in order to shame those who think they are wise.’
1 Corinthians 1:27

There is no God Vs Man because,
'For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways.'
Isiah 55:8-9

There is no God Vs Man because,
He has also set eternity in the hearts of men, yet they cannot fathom the work that God has done from beginning to end.
‎Ecclesiastes 3:11

There is no God Vs Man because,
' For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only son that whosoever believes in HIM shall not perish but have eternal life.'
John 3:16
The word of God is truth and light.
Final poem of 2024.
Thank you all for helping me grow my gift these past 6 months.
Merry Christmas all, may God continue to richly bless you and your families.
AWURAA Dec 7
I urge you do not fall in love with the version of a person you make in your head.

Delete the roleplays you keep on repeat in your mind.

Ignore your heart's beating at the thoughts you normally accept that will lead you into an endless spiral of lust.

You never got the chance to speak to the person you wish to know.

You do not know their likes of their dislikes.

You only love the version of them in your mind.

Let go.

Please let go.
AWURAA Dec 8
To the boy I allowed to have so much power over me,
You where never the problem,
I was.
My heart was unable to comprehend the difference between you and lust.

So I struggled with God.
I could not bring myself to say that it was not lust or like.

So I hated you.

Yes you wronged me.
But I hated you.

You were in my life so I could learn from you.
But still, I hated you.

You were the sore representation of the area I fell short in,
the area which I need more help in.

So to the boy I allowed to have so much power over me, you are not just outer appearance you are also your dreams and ambitions, desires and future Godly nature.


To the boy I allowed to have so much power over me, I hope you treat the women in your life with care and love.

I pray you do not hurt another girl's heart because I am not too sure if they know that they have a strong Father who will always be with them like I knew I did.

To the boy I allowed to have so much power over me, please do not go through your life racing through fathers daughters.
Please succeed so your children can have a better life than you ever did.

To the boy I allowed to have so much power over me, please walk to God so he can make you a better man than you can ever be.
Please love the lord your God "with all your heart and with all your strength and lean not on your own understanding."

To the boy I allowed to have so much power over me, when you meet her, treat her with care, honour her and clothe her with respect.
When you wife her, do not let your eyes roam as you did in your immature youth.

To the boy I allowed to have so much power over me, when you have children, let them know you will always listen and give them advice.

To the boy I allowed to have so much power over me, become the man who He wants you to be.
AWURAA Dec 2
I'll go first,

Growing up, there was a huge emphasis on marriage in my community.
Everything I watched was about love,  lust and relationships, this was all I consumed.

Later on in life,  I began to crave affection and attention from many if not always the males in my life.

This lead me into a spiral of thinking that every male I had an interaction with was going to be my husband.

We listen and we don't judge...
Can we create a chain?
AWURAA Oct 25
It is He who makes me whole.
Not man.
It is He who restores my soul.
Not man.
It is He who has dominion over me.
Not man.
It is He who will truly fill me.
Not man.
It is He who will truly love me,
Not only man.
So when I forget, and begin to return to my *****, Lord please remind me,
"I know the plans I have for you, plans of I good and not evil, plans to give you a hope and a future."
Good things sometimes take some time.
The eternity that you have placed in my heart, I cannot see from the beginning to the end, but you can.,
So I wait on you.
So I look to you.
Remind me o Lord that you are the only one who makes me whole.

— The End —