And she poured her pain out
in a red notebook.
Because that was the only way
she could bleed.

As I sit here, writing this, I’m wondering how you’ll react  
If you say something mean, prepare to be smacked  
Or maybe you’ll say something nice  
After all, you’d probably give me good advice
Curiosity is like that urge  
That can suddenly emerge  
It can kind of feel overwhelming at times  
Almost like it’s consuming you alive  
Come on, come on, I want to explore!  
So I ****** open that front door  
My footsteps, loud against the wooden floor  
A great mystery is never a bore    
Adventure awaits!  
So I climb upstairs with great haste  
What lies before me is another door  
And for some reason, I feel all sore  

Behind that door, I see your face  
Looking back at me, locked in place  
What will you do? What will you say?  
Will you just try and push me away?  
My eyes widen, my heart beats fast  
I want to run, run away from my past

I don’t want to alarm you  
I can’t stand seeing you hurt  
This constant, nagging pain  
Is like an everlasting rain  
A giant raincloud, swept over my head  
I want to stay in my bed instead  
But I know that’s just an excuse  
To keep myself from facing the truth  

Suddenly, your face lights up  
That smile again, it’s so abrupt  
And I rush to you, tackling you to the floor  
Hugging you with all my heart, bringing all these feelings ashore  
I thought I went into this on my own  
And your appearance has my mind blown  
My heart flutters in my chest  
I think a feeling within has coalesced
So, as we walk outside, I tease you with a li’l shove  
I think this feeling, it has to be love.

It's been a rough year.
It feels so tiring, to be so alone.
When I wake up in an empty bed, I cannot help but run away.
My heart has no home.
I long to fade into you.
Am I the chorus or the verse?
Neither lasts that long.
I know not what I do.
I just want to be held, to feel like I belong.
I reach out my hand, but only touch the void.
I feel it flowing through my veins.
They say This soon shall pass.
But it will never fade, my loneliness has already overtaken the day.

I? A Heroine? You care about the end?
A nice story to encourage children for life!
While I wade through a swamp of thoughts
ugly, muddy, smelling of death trolls underneath.
I do doubt if there is an end at all.
I do doubt each temporary sense of joy.
I call them clever decoys, set by time
And time to fool us all like a group
of chickens fluttering wings for food.
yes, darling! All heroines passed the road
put an end, bold as brass, daring as a dagger
but I,baby-like, stumble and stagger
This isn't fair, and fair is not the point.
Let the pain crumble each muscle and joint.
But life! oh life plays her cards close to her chest!
And knows how to make disorder manifest.