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Poetria Mar 2016
Thought #1:
We all got together, the 12 of us.
We sat in a circle and remembered
the old days, the good days;
the only days.
We talked, we laughed, we cried.
We came back to life.

Thought #2:
We all got together, the 12 of us.
One of us left when it became a little too much, and locked herself in a room alone. I don't know what you guys found so funny. I wanted to know, and I didn't want to.

Thought #3:
We all got together, the 12 of us.
The circle was a gaping black hole,
or maybe my vision was blurring.
I left when the tears threatened to spill.
You followed me.

1:26 A.M

Thought 4:
It wasn't a circle, it was an oval.
They weren't happy, they were delirious.

Thought 5:**
You followed me.
I was sitting by the window.
You stood there and watched me paint pictures on the glass.

Thought 6:
I went back to the circle.
Everybody was gone.
I sat alone in the middle of the room.

Thought 7:
Everybody was gone.
You returned.
We watched The Book Of Life.
We cried.

1:28 A.M

Thought 8:
We all got together, the 12 of us.
We all sat in an oval and
remembered the only days.
We talked, we laughed, we cried.  
For once, we all felt alive.

Thought 9:
We all got together, the 12 of us.
We were strangers.
We smiled and talked about life.
We laughed over silly jokes.
We ate pizza.
We said our goodbyes.

1:29 A.M

Thought #10:
We never got together, the 12 of us.
We forgot about each other.
We left all of it behind.
We focused on our new lives.

1:30 A.M
- - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - -
edited out some parts I hated
18
Poetria Aug 2019
18
18 crept in with the quiet illusion of comfort

in the flakes of snow outside Gloria Jean
's

on a Sunday afternoon
, sipping something

warm and letting the cold seep into my skin

only to burrow myself into a warm blanket

afterwards
. 18, upon arrival, was gifted

with gorgeousness writ by a favorite friend
.

However, 18 came quietly, the world

defining her before she could have spoken to

me herself
. 18 began to hurt, trying to find

what she was born to be rather than what

she was being molded into
. 18, like snow,

was fragile. 18 had been January, and

then just as fast
, she is March. 18 is script-

writing with Mahnoor again
, just like 15,

16, 17, familiarity. 18 is confusion and

panic
, a growing sense of unease,

muffling a voice in my head trying its

hardest to be heard
. Upon seeing April, 18

did not desire this trip anymore. But the

Spring brought whispers of vanilla and a boy

with the softest smile in a place of pain
. 18

was running off to corners of life, trying to

escape the stench of dying that had taken to

following her around
. 18 survived May, 18

survived June. 18 fell into July, a house

of gloom
, and decided to settle in the

month
, if only the month would settle for

18. The world was calling her, but she

would not be seen
. 18 ran back to the long-

awaited cold
, overcome with joy for the

numbered days
, a birthday again, a

bittersweet break
, an ache for escape.

But 18 walked away from July, and

found herself in August
, quite by surprise.

And August, she realizes, can be

anything she likes
.
August is ambiguous
#18
Poetria Sep 2020
i have been given the signs
and they taste just like wine
in that i've never known what it's like
to follow through with anything good
like paradise in stitches and worn by a child
your mother asking for your care, your time
but you still choose to linger in a place
where the zoned-out stay for moments in a day
you choose to tear the flowers clean out of your ribcage
give them a bright dye, keep them on display
to regurgitate all over this cold hospital white

i have been given the signs
of a perfectly sweet life
and i am still scared of toothache
this is SO conversational. or maybe i don't do conversation right.
Poetria Aug 2017
and i wonder why tonight
my mind is screaming for silence
like a mockery of itself
shouting for a noiseless abyss
begging to be heard in the quiet
and i wonder why tonight
there are so many gaps
in my memory of past events
and i wonder if i lost those moments
or if i chose to throw them away
and i wonder why tonight
the world seems so much nastier
than it's ever been before.
the lack of punctuation is deliberate
Poetria Aug 2021
carve yourself a fresh wound
between your shoulder blades
this is how your blood transfers to me:
hot steel draining into these canals uninvited

fallen angel named a saint in his glory days
i carry the burden of the fire that you are
light in the sky my feet bleed to outrun
i suffer from the weight of my misjudgment

always the Sun: all-consuming, and unburnt
a self-fulfilling knife, and a pacemaker pulse
with you, religion ends and my faithlessness begins
infliction serves to aggravate this ruined innocence

your ruthlessness is heaven-sent and eating me alive
you are the cause of everything, are too the cause despite
i look to you in blame, but it circles back to me
that traitorous, inevitable, infinite shape

there is no space inside your heart that i could ever win
i miss the story of the saint that you could've been
i realised that you do not always get to decide what you are defined by: and i am defined by this relationship, whether by choice or by consequence, or both. you do not choose who your father is, you can only choose how to make sense of what he's done. he will be so deeply woven into your flesh by the time you can see it for yourself, and by then you are already in the aftermath
Poetria Nov 2016
Perhaps,
perhaps the question
is not of who we are in our minds
but instead
where we have wound up to be
with the passage of time-
and time--
ticking seconds,
the blinking of eyes-
multiplied by the capacity
of a would-be lived life-
Indeed,
it could also be a question of
when we will reach
that place, or the faces
where our ends will soon meet
with the path of a victim
to the realms infinite;
lost in time- losing grip-
no control of our minds, tell me-
*do you see what I see in
the blink of an eye?
Do tell.
Poetria Jan 2017
If you have done a little breaking,
you have been a little broken.
Poetria Jul 2016
Another fight against
Another thoughtful night.

Another sleepless plight.
Another hour to hide.
Another day to realise.

There's so many things
that aren't right
in this life.

Another mug of coffee;
The burn against my palms.

Another night to choose.
Another choice of harm.

Another aching heart,
Another thoughtless write.

Another failed attempt
at spilling grains of truth
from my mind.
I feared the addiction.
Poetria Apr 17
If my words are worthy
And if they are a trail of stars
Let them lead me back to You
Do not let me stray too far

And when my heart is lonely
When my light submits to dark
Do not let me lose You
Do not let me stray too far
I think this will be the most definitive year of my life so far
Poetria Jun 2016
My dearest friend,

My love for you
Does not come crashing
with the winds of the storm.

Nay, rather it comes
with all the funny things that you do,
all the silly pictures that you pose for,
all the sad letters and the cheesy lines
you spew from your arrogant mind.

I know that I should not be happy
when I recieve the sadness that you bleed, broken bottles full of need.

But I cannot help loving you
for all that you are.
I adore the poetry.
I also adore you.

I hope we can talk soon, really talk, just the two of us in our fragile pocket of this universe. Just me. Just you.
Reply soon.

Sincerely, me
Yeah, I just turned your text message into a Shakespearean letter. Why? I'm out of ideas.
Poetria Feb 2020
i have seen you dancing with trees
warm and familiar, with an air that is sweet
in here, you appear, you dance into being
behind my closed eyes, you're watching me breathe

here i am autumn, stretching on beyond decree
opposite these falling leaves,
you are rosy cheeks and beaming teeth
but i insist, i am convinced:
autumn is a beautiful place to be

you are all that i seek,
all i would like to believe is real
so i try to remember if you ever liked me

but you are endlessly sunlit,
hued honey-gold, and evergreen
and this half-eyed fading lucidity,
is the only place we can hope to meet
so i insist, i am convinced:
autumn is my most beautiful dream
This poem is a conversation between little me and too-old me

written January 2020
Poetria Dec 2020
in fear, i am a crowded space
you fret over the ethics of it, and roast the turkey anyway
do you understand what i am trying to say?
i learnt how to swim, so i should be over this drowning

see, when things get all night-timed and dream-eyed
i know i can love and be loved
it radiates warmth, this old star blanket
like the feeling that comes with a hug

and this is the coldest month of the year, you know
some days i escape just to know there's a sun
an overbearing, godly thing on fire
so i'd rather risk my lungs, submerged

and the sun is so wrong i come back to it all:
the darkness, nerves, the dead bird
and the things i should know, that i don't

so when you say fire will keep me warm,
do you not see how that burns?
there's something off about my recent poems. i wonder if it's something i'm doing to try to fit some type of way of writing them? i love what i'm re-reading when i go through them, but there's something not right. don't know what it is, and i won't know. maybe it's the subject matter getting stale. i need to get out of my comfort zone.
Poetria Oct 2015
I try to write you back,
but were you ever mine to write?
edit: I deleted almost all of it haha
Poetria Oct 2020
you say a thing, i say another:
now we are emotional

this room is not temperate;
the air is thick with ghost conversation

so we wait to feel better, we straighten our mouths
you burst wrap bubbles and i crush sour grapes

can your hands give me the love they still hold?
i am not the same each year, and you seem not to know

i ask if you can bring peace to my mind
instead, you command the waiter to smile

do you see? i am trying to break glass here

now you are taking your afternoon nap
and the thing in this room is wailing

i wait for you to wake,
but you sleep on blunted cutlery

it's that nobody likes talk of fixing the blinds,
so we adjust the curtains

now this room remembers less of light
and do you know we aren't breathing?
someday in the future my therapist will be reading my poems and telling me i never did manage my anger, it just shows up differently now.
Poetria Jul 2021
wake up, dark cloud
eyes ache the worst when they are red

sun is somewhere we can't reach it
how do i write about this?

my mind supplies me with lavender fields,
anything beautiful

cruelty, rage, the side of your face
how do i write about this?

a dream, a hug, a poem; the alto, the M2, the mall
desert to oasis, any day now

your wings of chrome in shreds, in shards
the glitter on this road

waiting for the day to close,
horizon's coloured sob

how long until you reach for it?
the end
the title is a song by sufjan stevens
Poetria Jan 2018
colourblind
to traffic lights
but I know how they're
supposed to look

I walk along
a thinning kerb
frequently falling
stumbling along

nothing stops me
I stay on the edge
this line between safety
and imminent death
what punctuation? ;P
Poetria May 2015
Words flying through her mind
Scattered, uncoordinated;
Not in a straight line
They all jumble together
To form her persona,
She's a being made with a vocabular aura
Her soul can be read like a scripture.
People go through her like a book
Some don't take care of her.
Others admire, others desire
Others simply need her to complete their set.
Some find beauty in her unique mindset.
Some judge by the cover
Others read and discover
Between the lines
Of her complex mind
Some like her; some don't
She's not a bestseller
Her author is God
Books with blank pages? They tell her
That really is odd
She smiles a small smile
At their shallow train of thought
Then continues her journey
*Built on the words they forgot.
Poetria Dec 2017
Perhaps I do not want to be poet
but to be the poetry
you carve into yourself
to be the thought
right before you close your eyes
to be the smile
climbing up your cheeks
to be your sunrise,
sunset, stars and sky
to be your moonlight,
and reflect your Oceanic blue
I do not know who you are,
but I want to inspire flowers
from your mind
,
and I want to be able
to call you mine.
but she wants to be
Poetria Mar 2017
Do not build your house
upon the clouds
because while they look able
they fall apart
like the best of us
when their load amounts
to more than they were created for
they open up and pour
and feed the greens of the floor
and I know they sound
promising to visit
but I'll let you know
don't float too close
because they lose their brilliance
and are much more shallow
than the rain they pour
had you assuming
before.
Maybe live on a field in a place it's almost always raining; precipitation is just the fallen pieces of a cloud after all.
Poetria Aug 2020
here is the end of an era
a season of desperate drought
we carry these bags, the luggage we have
while in these frail cubes we are bound to stay sat

eating plastic for food, wearing pixels for eyes
the warmth that we know is of blazing pink skies
our present lives offer no living
the books i so love start to tear at the seams,

all reality becomes less sure than a dream
nothing is as it should seem to be
our clock has sped up as the men aim their guns
and the women are told to stay silent and sweet

losing ourselves, we consent to this mess
horizons of East burn to bleed and hold "peace",
dark roses of truth colour this cursed country
a lifetime of growth swears to halt at my feet

2020: year of grief, no relief
this bleak closing scene promises to haunt me
the title is another stolen lyric ;) i think i'm losing whatever talent i had because this took me two to three hours to write, and not 5 minutes. maybe this is aging.
Poetria Sep 2017
16 years older
our faces painted over
wasting time to feel the rush
classic self-destruction
still, we are children
older, not different
pretending to be
bigger than the universe
and we are that, we are indeed-

-our facepaint glowing
a multicoloured mixture
in the sunlight now
and our heads are
loosening once again
16 years younger
as clocks chase the future
and we waste our time  
because we still can.
pretty much.
#16
Poetria Sep 2017
My conscience
carries your voice,
it wears your face;
I'm talking to you
when I think to myself.
Poetria Jun 2015
Thoughts from one mind,
Transferred to another.
From one pair of lips,
Words are exchanged
With the other.
Understanding;
A mutual bond
Is discovered.
Agreement, disagreement,
Friendship, lovers.
These words can be sharp
And cut to your heart.
These words can be sweet,
But not necessarily smart.
They can end lives,
They can cause anger to rise.
Conversation is dangerous
In some situations.
Conversation is life-saving
If the thoughts uttered are wise.
Poetria Nov 2017
divided,
undecided,
trying to hide it;
struggling.
indecisiveness is a curse in a world where you can either be one thing or the other
Poetria Feb 2018
The only love I want to feel anymore
is the love of the Sea, of the trees, of mountains and rainbows and beautiful buildings, flowers and strangers and poetry, animals and books and art and everything alive,
everything I can only catch glimpses of, everything I need, which I don't have.

I need the love of the Earth, not it's people.
I'll start writing more seriously after my exams in May, but here's something for now
Poetria May 2015
During the day,
My brain is in chains,
At night it breaks out of its cage.

During the night,
My dreams, they take flight;
And I wish they would give me a fright.
Edited on July 25th, 2015
Edited again.
Poetria Dec 2019
cold air is burning my face but the feeling is muffled, far away.
i look at you, stoic menace.
you are a block of ice and i am a flurry of snowflakes, raging, cold, soft.
you ask me what the heart speaks.
i do not know how to tell you what emotion is, just like i do not know how to explain to you what i am.

(things far too familiar are seldom easy to translate into a language someone might understand, a language that is not your own, a language you've forgotten the taste of)

mountains on my shoulders feel lighter than they should, and you take lightness to mean of less matter.
perhaps you think these mountains have a hollow center, are made of feathers.
you and i are two different forms of water.
i have known ice, and you have known snow, years before today.
i have known stagnance, you have known change, you took the word like an icicle to your chest, falling too far into your cave.
pull me out, you say, and i am frost lining your windowsill.
leave me be, you say, and you are a dull fog, whispering to glass.
through the glass, we interact.
you are trapped.
i want to see you cry for hours and never stop until you run out of what's made you so cold.
Poetria Jun 2017
I let myself go,
and I float among the clouds,
hiding behind this infinite sun,
for this time, I will be no one.

Unnoticed I go,
and I never come back too soon,
because the stars are so much closer
and I have feelings for the moon.

I left a long time ago,
I remember living in pollution,
down where the trees struggle to breath
down where reality was choking me.

I won't be back home tomorrow,
so don't call me down, don't be sad;
I'll be back when I'm ready to realise
I'm no longer a weightless ghost.
(I'll heal better on my own.)
Poetria Nov 2023
the death of a loved one is a serious matter. this is my immediate thought when you are mentioned somewhere, sometime, somehow, in conversation. the death of a loved one, you would have said, is a serious matter.

you would have said, death is serious and grief is inevitable, but persist in finding the joy anyway; in defeating those dastardly tendrils of gloom that will threaten to pull you into the dark forever. outrun the shadows and find yourself always warm and well under the Sun’s guiding glow.

you would have said, let them judge your misery and misinterpret your intent: people will always be quick to call something wrong if they just don't understand it. You would tell me, always, not to care about the opinions of the masses anyway. 'So what?' You would say.

my phonetics professor said it too, one day, and I almost cried, the tears were rather stubborn in that moment, fighting my lashes for safe passage. To publicly showcase your grief, I think, is to do yourself more harm than good,

so bury you I will, within paragraphs like this, until, at the ordinance of the clock, I am to put away thoughts of death and sentiment, and instead, turn my face toward the Sun, to wash these blues in waves of gold, that I might find myself a part of life, and, that I might learn to love all things anew.
could do the normal thing and write incredibly private thoughts down in a neat little notebook, call it my journal, and that'd be that but nooo, gotta be all dramatic and not at all serious enough
Poetria Jul 2019
i want to write a poem about you,
but your smile has stolen the words i would use

the spring brought these flowers,
and now summer has bloomed
edit: i cut the pretentious first two couplets out
Poetria Sep 2016
Is it really special
If he tells you your hair smells
like freshly picked strawberries?

Does it make you smile
When he compliments the dress
you bought from some vintage store
where they've got hundreds more?

Would you call it love
If you watched the same shows
and could talk endlessly about them
but there was nothing more?

I'd hate to burst your bubble,
but strawberry shampoo is global,
and that dress won't sell out in years,
and those shows will eventually get old.
We live under clouds of delusion and hope.
Poetria Dec 2015
She's the kind of person who can capture fragments of the universe in her writing,
but never the whole of it.
She likes to wonder about strange little things,
but she's so ordinary.
She's the same as the rest of us,
or so it may seem.
But there's just something so enticing about her,
something that draws you in when you hear her speak.
Maybe it's the way she creates pictures with her hands,
or maybe it's the way her eyes take on a faraway glow of mirth,
and mystery when she's thinking.
She isn't perfect,
she's far from it and she knows.
But you could stare at her all day,
perhaps counting her quirks or her flaws.
Or even just spend your time
listening to the wisdom spilling out of her mind.
You'd wish she were yours.
She'd wish for much more.
She'd watch the stars from afar
But she'd never think of herself as one.
Poetria Oct 2017
Don't you exhale around me.
Don't give me that poisoned air
spilling back out of your trachea
like it's fresh and healthy,
don't.

Don't you pretend the pieces fit,
that the glass is still transparent
that this box you've built
never broke in the first place,
don't.

Don't give me your traditionalistic,
misogynistic, conservative values
and expect me to digest them
like my favourite kind of chips,
don't.  

Don't you breathe in my space anymore. Don't you do that again.
I've been crying over you for over an hour. Fix this.
Poetria Sep 2016
Swimming pool,
water burning my eyes.
Thoughts of you
tickling my frail mind.
Poetria Oct 2015
Because when you live on a sphere,
there's nowhere to run.
You'll just keep running until you get tired, and accept defeat.
When your options of freedom deceive you,
when they add up to some other form of what you're going through,
there's nothing much you can do.
Because when everybody around you breaks their word
and you've got nobody,
what can you really do
but pray the ground doesn't fall through?  
The fragility of trust has yet to be acknowledged, it seems.
I guess I'll just keep walking down this never ending road,
because I've nowhere else I can really go.
And maybe I'll find another unfortunate being, as lost as I am.
Maybe we could work this out together.
*Maybe we can all someday, somehow
Find our way home.
1:00 A.M thoughts.
I believe that it's the most hopeless situations that spark the fire of hope within us.
The most hopeless things,
they give us inspiration to write a mile of verses about hope.
Poetria Apr 2019
i need you now
the sky stays dark for longer
and when it's pretty it's so so far

friend,

i reached out
though my ability to reach is weak
you didnt reach back far enough
i am sorry

friend,

i think i broke my own heart this year
its not a subtle sadness its
the discomfort in a forced hug by my father its
my mothers tired eyes my sisters urgency my brothers pain its

wanting to die but being too afraid
wanting to live but feeling too restrained
wishing i was five years old so i could be forgiven for the way ive been living
and the fear is crawling through my body every moment im awake

failure is so close now, regret will soon follow

and the saddest songs make me want to get up and dance

friend,

i need help but im too proud to ask
I never listened to the playlist you made me on my birthday. You know, and i should, and i sincerely mean to.
Poetria Aug 2021
this place is all bullets and plastic wrap
you are a space for which i am glad

you are a million moons changing,
beacon in the fog
staying light just the same,
holding on in the dark

your blanket with sleeves is a warmth that i seek
your comfort, like chocolate, is endlessly sweet

until the next song, until the next start
put me in your pockets, hold onto my heart

softer shades and falling leaves,
you are a reckoning that came out clean
i modified a poem i wrote for my dearest friend mahnoor 2 years ago. in a city so cruel, and a place that's been ruined for me in memory, she was the light. she has always been a source of sweetness for me and nothing but. to cultivate a friendship so strong with her is something i want to always get better at doing. there is truly nobody as good and kind and as much of an angel. blanket with sleeves is in reference to the blanket with sleeves she owns and i envy :( she gave me chocolates for my birthday & when i met her in 2019 at her house she had this cute plate of small chocolates prepared. i have taken notes and will steal the idea. her name means moonlight so i will always associate her with the moon more than anything else. what i wanted to tell her in this poem was initially that i am so glad to be able to call her my friend and for her to choose me to be by her side after all of this time and after any times i've wronged her is something i value more than i ever say. the last line is borne out of a time where i took my friendships for granted, and doubted them, and honestly, i think the reckoning that (to my relief) came out clean should be me instead. i do love to have tunnel vision though. not to dwell on the past, though. i just love her so much and promise to write a better poem than this for her one day!! and we dont count the other poem i titled friend and wrote with u in mind because its just very insecure and i dont like it
Poetria Oct 2020
my friends
you are a garden of fantastic flora
at dawn you are peaceful in sleep
among cats and bicycle men
firmly rooted, you are roses
all elegant thorns and complex structure
and the earth from which you grow is all softness
the leaves you hold high rustle rich in laughter
this, i know

my friends
i am liquid land born from a storm
born from skies that dislike sleep
find me in the yawn of dawn
and when i am not the sun, i will water you
this poem brings me joy
Poetria Oct 2016
Through insomniac nights
a fuzzy grey mouse and I
coexist under lamplight.

My sleeping routine,
it's far from a dream
but my buddy and me,
we feel free.

He stays in the shadows
Collecting little bites
of leftover dinner to eat.

He comes out at night
and scuttles in this light;
he's put his trust in me.

I honour my promises,
and mice have their rights
so I vow to tell nobody.

So when I can't sleep-
in secret we meet,
my fuzzy grey friend
and me.
P.S When I wrote this, HE SQUEAKED!
Poetria Jan 2021
i wouldn't know a leaf from a flower,
mercy rain on a withering Tuesday

give and take, and you're given back
silver secrets only miracles understand
mama
Poetria Aug 2020
i am scared to be.
to love.
to lose.

i laugh and it is musical.
i laugh and it is hopeless.

i see a mountain and i see my house and they are two things that should be the same but one is a breathless life and the other a painless death.

one is fleeting,
the other a gaping minute on a clock that slowly ticks.

one is a boy with a heart,
the other a boy in the news.

one is a jeep that climbs the sky in a peaceful moment,
the other is our ambulance, raging along these city streets.

one is my mother:
she is the most beautiful person to exist.
the other is a creature's corpse wearing her skin.

there are fruits that prosper and fruits that rot:
fruits full of worms and fruits half-forgot.

there are strangely shaped ghars filled with things i've seen in dreams, inside caves i could never imagine to know.

there is this ghar made of carcass i have always known, that is so, so tired and should not exist.

so i am scared to be.
to live.
to lose.

i laugh and i am crying.

i see this ghar and i see my ghar and they are two things that should be the same but one is breathing, moving, and the other is a body that will be still forever, and i don't want to be here like this any more.
Ghar - Mountain (in the Pashto language)
Ghar - House (in the Urdu language)
Poetria Feb 2017
I suppose,
when you have felt the high
and you have also felt
at an all time low,
all you really want
is to feel it all over again
or to feel nothing at all.

So you sit on the side of the pavement
just a little outside safe but
just enough over the line,
accepting the danger
you may be forced to face.

Anxious and excited,
or sometimes nothing at all
and you sit there all alone until
you are sitting there
no more.
I think it's called overthinking, but I'll just think over that some more.
Poetria Feb 2021
(i)

when you are good
i soak up your goodness
like a plant under the sun
green for just a season

(ii)

when you are good
you hold a roof above my head
you sew a smile across my face
i question what goodness is

(iii)

when you are good
it hurts my eyes to look at you
you burn across the universe
it hurts to look at anything at all
the people who hurt you can be good to you too. how do you learn how to stop loving somebody you've loved for a lifetime?
Poetria Oct 2015
The gypsy life,
never in one place twice.
Always on the go,
metaphorically so.

The gypsy mind,
it's one of a kind.
Always changing,
rearranging.

The gypsy type,
they never think twice.
So easy to lose,
*They're too fast for you.
Poetria Oct 2017
I know you like your loneliness
but don't leave me here alone;
I'm in love with your melancholy,
your crevices, my home
(I stole the title from a band lyric)
Poetria May 2015
We have all the time in the world, we say
But how much time is that anyway?

A world of bloodshed and poverty,
governmental discrimination, and anarchy.

People avoiding this harsh reality,
Our hearts ignoring their silent pleas

No, life is far from being a dream
Our world is tearing at the seams

*Is humanity a miracle
Or disease?
Poetria Jan 2018
I am
a soul on stilts
a painted face
with coloured pockets
and layers of skin

I am
living in blue
thinking in green
dreaming of colours
I've never seen
Poetria May 2016
The bright, white, fluorescent lights could be electricity's eyes.

They blink at me when I let go of sleep and watch me when I'm incredibly weak, when I'm just too tired to speak.

Sometimes I think the sun should be shining a quarter past midnight for us sad, dark souls still alive.

Sometimes the sun sets expectations the moon cannot reach, so the sun fools it into thinking it's got some light inside.

I don't like the sun. I don't like what I've become. I think it's easier to rest my tired eyes at sunrise.
Or maybe sleep can't find me.
Poetria Feb 2018
we are patients in a ward
all just healing from this storm

I am tired of the mess you make
I am scared for my tomorrow
I sleep all day to stay far away
but I'm forced again to wake

how do we get better
while the storm rages on
I've found a distaste for my writing beginning to form in my heart and now my words are lifeless too. Great.
Poetria May 2021
every day, you miss me
(i am) hiding by your side
revolving in your orbit
by destiny, by design

every day, coffee
your regular routine
you take it without sugar
you take it like disease

every day, fire
bloodshot eyes, peeling smile
no red-blue lights in windows
to reflect your quiet crimes

every day, i am still here
cruel world and coffee and burning alive
your name hurts this djinn-girl, wrong side of every line

every day, war
i try to write, but all i do is time
and every day is every day i've wasted
and every morning is another day to end
and every day, i plant these words
in my soul, in my wounds,
in your bone-chilling curse
you'll miss me when the angels haunt your grave
every morning is another day to end is the mood for 2021
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