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 May 2018 zebra
s
--
 May 2018 zebra
s
--
i careen between
thoughts of you and death
try to vocalize what i’m feeling
but you nod and digress

your words are shards i wish to digest
your love, a memory i wish to forget
 May 2018 zebra
s
mutilated self
 May 2018 zebra
s
you little shattered thing, have
you lost your pieces again?
are you still
seeking comfort
from someone's
apathetic hands?
allowing yourself to cave in
to their abysmal demands?

you stupid little thing you
disappear more every day
even your reflection dissipates
cause it can't bare to see your face

you human-turned-monster
have you forgotten how to live?
didn't anyone teach you how to give
parts of yourself to the others?

you ******* idiot
why can't you remember the past?
do you just choose to forget?
and why do you lie
about your quiet laments?
are you blissfully ignorant  
or are you consumed by regret?

     your sweet shy soul
     where did it go?
depression
depression
depression
 May 2018 zebra
A Simillacrum
Look at what your love made.
Sharing space with you.
It made me disconnect.
The greater I long for you.
The farther from me you get.

You said you love me truly.
I doubt now you felt that.
Years and years they etch in stone.
The water under the bridge.
Has worn away your act.

You love me or You need me.
Separate the line.
The fire you ignite in me.
Now burns me alive.
 May 2018 zebra
A Simillacrum
whispers come out
of control
of the mouth
of the
selfish thinker

undertones
select know
while in air
their spare
venom lingers

cruelty whips the paranoid
not anxious for no reason
get in line good girls and boys
be one or zero
curve to the confines
of the basic language

meanwhile
the hermit sits
scooping sand
with her
hand and fingers

given that she has
felt the breadth
of human hate
from some the
closest to her

she will still
sit cross legged in pain
every new day
as each day past
spinning the comic
and the tragic

into verse
unique to her
as the voice
in her mind
convinces her

it could keep
others alive

so she sings
she screams
songs of hope
and victory
leaving

whispers
where they ought
to be

hanging
with the liars
unheard
for time enough
in futures
never said
inspired by and
for emnabee

as well as
for all the
Arachne Duana Fortuna

thank you for your secret words
they save and summon
keep on
keep on
 May 2018 zebra
A Simillacrum
The years have passed
I thought they mattered
In sleeping so long
I come disappointed
Hip leading foot
Perpetually faster
Downhill

The fads have passed
I thought they would end

Well,
in sleeping so long
I come disappointed
Kicking up trash
Plastered in faces
Pretty in package
Marketable mouths
Dripping lips

Told what to say before
they understand a thing.

The years have passed
I thought they mattered
In sleeping so long
I come disappointed
Hip leading foot
Perpetually faster
Downhill

Your best friend sells sugar for pennies
and you say it's dirt cheap when you
know full well that you can find
sweetness herself in leaves.

In the near distance fires light
the violent sky, violet-black
in the orange-red we see
when we shut our
open eyes.

We always saw this coming
as our masters asked it
from us, but the
master never
was there
when
we
c
r
i
e
d

Take my money take my soul
give me level ups lest I
cry again.

.number crunch.
.number cruncher.
.number crunch.

The new human condition
took weakness as a sign.

We are marked better dead
than alive
by

The World Above
Don't offer me a cardboard moon
In shining, gilded whispers
I've stood on midnight hilltops
And kissed the burning stars.

Don't promise me a royal someday
In phrases with their fingers crossed.
I've set my hour glass on taller shelves
And you, my dear, are just a ladder.
                                     ljm
Floating on an inner tube
Just above the falls
Never mind the current
The joy of summer calls.
ljm
Sometimes the now is more important than the later.
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