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Sophia Marie Aug 2015
Music, like an everyday-medicine, we take.
The text-- to our hearts-- sometimes tastes,
Bitter it is, still we devour, as if its a cake.
Bitter, how you need peace, it betrays.

To most of you,
Music is about what meaning lies behind.
To most of you,
Music is all about the soothing rythm you find.

But to a too broken person,
Who found voices that express,
An extraordinary love was born,
A love that--once felt--is hard to surpress.

We are the broken people you call immature,
Just for 'obssesing' over something out of your nature.
We are the broken people whom you judge,
But who are we to hold a grudge?

Id like to take this opputunity,
To inform an array that critisize,
We are not in the least guilty,
For dedicating something to those who saved our lives.

But for the record,
We, fans do feel.
Being respected,
Will be very much appreciated.
solfang Apr 2021
she said
I should suppress
my feelings for now
and she is right;

deep down I'm just
too tired to fight;
sometimes I find myself
walking further from the light;
and for that I feel like
my life can never be bright
(cont. from previous poem)
my therapist said that it is best if I increase my dosage, so I can temporarily suppress my feelings
Rose Amberlyn Sep 2012
A fragile blood rich body,
balanced upon a protective slender stem.
Petals that surpress secrets far within,
A tender bud far from blooming,
that is perched upon my window sill.
In months to come its secrets are
exposed.
Opening, it reveals its death.
Once beautiful, turned crisp and brown,
rotting away within itself.
All the lies released into the cold winter's
air.
Limp and hanging from its crystal vase,
the underneath visible.
What was beautiful is now foul.
Why would you give a loved one a rose?
I would not.
Hawk Flight Jun 2014
.
       Taking one last drag off My cig I flick it to the ground and watche the little sparks of flames that shoot off it as it hits the ground. It is 11:00 on a wednesday night and I was parked in a bad part of town in a small conneticcit town. leaning against My beat up old 2003 black ford focus the window in the back seat rolls down.

     "Hawk how long are these guys going to take? Are you sure they're even coming?" Twittle says around a huge *** yawn. I pin him with one of my glares that said Shut the **** up. He pins me with one of his own glares I DARE you written all over it. My heart thuds just a little faster in my chest. All I wanted to do right now was take him home and accept that I dare you challenge. His cocky *** grin showed that he kenw what he was doing to me. I narrow my eyes at him.

      "Watch it boy" I growl and turn my attention back to the deserted parking lot, trying to calm my nerves. What was taking them so long? I figured for cociane addicts the thugs would have been here right on time to get their next fix. My nose burning at the memories of all the times I had felt the rush of a fix. Then up ahead in the glow of a random streetlamp I see three shadowy figures heading our way.

      "Twittle get out of the car they're here" I said and pushed off the car, not waiting for his response,I head in the guys direction. I hear the car door open and slam shut, and within seconds I feel twittles presence right behind me. The three junkies stop a few feet away from us.

       "You.. you got the stuff man?" The man who seemed like the leader said to me. His voice shook and was too high pitched. The guy was already high out of his skull. Just my luck, The high ones were always the worst to deal with, just about the deprived ones. At least that type was easier to manipulate. The ones that were high were too paranoid to pull a fast one over thier heads. I sighed, guess I wasnt going to be getting more then the coke was worth. ****, and I was hoping for a few extra hundreds so I could take twittle out for the night.

         "Yeah yeah I got it right here" I said in my casual, I'm chill there is nothing wrong here voice, a voice one must perfect if they are going to do the type of buisness I do. I pull out the baggie filled with the white powder that they were craving. In the dim lighting I could just make out the wide eyed staring of the guys, the look of raw need and lust. I sympathized with them, I knew that feeling all to well. "Now give me the money and you will get what you came here for" I said still casual, but an underlying threat present. The leader takes a step forward and eyes the drug suspisiciouly.

        "Is it all there? You aint trying to trick us or anything right?" He says paranoia seeping into his words as the drugs already in his system take control of his brain. A sharp anger flares up in me, How Dare he accuse me of cutting corners! I may try to swindle a few extra dollars out of people but I never give them less then what they asked! I quickly squash down the anger, it would do nothing but start a fight.

       "Yes its all here all (wont put real amount) of it. now give me the money" I says trying to surpress my annoyance. I feel Twittle step closer to me and feel his hand on my lower back. showing his silent support. **** these junkies, they needed to give me my ******* money now Before Twittle made me lose my mind. I held out my hand showing the leader I meant buisness and held the drugs out of his reach.  Money then drugs

         "Norm use to give us the goods Then let us give him the money, How about we do it that way." One of the other guys says, the other lackey snickering. I turn my glare to them and they quickly shut up.

         "Well I'm not Norm, I'm better." I say flashing them a deadly grin. The one who made the comment strides up and looks at the goods from a safe distance. Suddenly he whips around to the leader.

        "Man the ******* is trying to play us! Thats not Coke thats ******* FLour!" He screams in a full blown drug fit. My anger flares up again. I may be a crook and a drug dealer but I NEVER Played my customers that way. I always gave them what they wanted, Nothing less nothing more. The leader swore and reaching behind him he draws a gun out. Pointing it straight at me. Outwards I show that this was nothing new to me that it didnt affect me, which was true, I've had guns pulled on me more times then I would like to remember. I felt Twittle tense up behind me and with my free hand I reach around and grabs his, squeezing it to show him everything will be ok.

       "Look guys this is the real ****, Now you can either take it and give me the money or you can just walk away and find a new dealer." I said straining to keep the situation calm. I knew how to disarm the guy if I needed to but with Twittle there I really didnt want to. The leader hesitates for a few seconds but then points the guns at me again.

         "How about you give me the drugs and forget you ever met me." He says his voice laced with drug hysteria. I sigh and shake my head.

       " I would love to boys. But not without my money. Listen this is how its going to happen You're going to pu-" A loud ring fills the air cutting me off mid sentence. A few seconds later a White hot fire burns through my shoulder as the bullet slices through me making me stagger back from the impact. The ******* ****** Shot Me! I've been shot at numerous times, and stabed more times then I could remember, Hell I've walked around for a full day with a small blade stuck in my fourarm and didnt even notice until the pain finally got to me. But never Once had I been actually SHOT!. The pain was blinding and I could feel hot liquid ooze down my arm and knew my shoulder was losing blood.

       "You ******* ******* come here!" I hear Twittle yell and I lift my head just high enough to see him tear after the trio.

       "Twittle... No" I managed to say through the pain, but he didnt hear me. I turned toward the car, I had a gun my self in the glove box If I could get to it and get to the junkies in time maybe I could protect Twittle. I took a few steps and staggered, almost falling forward. My vision was clouding around the edges. Oh for **** sakes Was I really going to pass out? really? I thought angery with my body for being such a whimp. I couldnt pass out now! I had to help Twittle, He could get in serious trouble. I reached the car and fumbled with the car door trying to open it. I lost my balance slightly and slammed my bad shoulder into the window. The white pain intenifying. Biting back a moan I slid down the cars length landing on the ground. I looked at my shoulder and in the dark I could just barely see the dark liquid that covered my entire arm. I looked at my hand and saw the sticky red blood dripping off of it and pooling on the asphalt next to me. I was loosing way to much blood. I tried to stand up but my strength decided just then to desert me. My hearing was going screwy and the black cloud at the edges of my vision was creeping in faster.

   Was I dying? I knew I was. I gave a bitter laugh. Out of all the ways I could die I was going to die at the hands of a coke Addict. Heh I knew coke would somehow be the death of me. NIcole and Kaitlyn were right. To bad I wouldnt be around to tell them. And Twittle, I failed him, I couldnt protect him, If he died tonight with me it was all my fault. He wouldnt know How much I truely loved him. I'm sorry Twittle I think as I wait the agonizing minutes before unconsiousness takes me. Right before I slid under I hear what sounds like someone screaming my name. I struggle to open my eyes, but they are so heavy. WHy are they so ******* heavy? why cant they just open up so I can see who is calling to me! I feel someone grab my face and move it so they can see it.

       "Hawk open your eyes, please baby open them." I hear twittle say, only he sounds like he is miles away from me. I pick up the fear and desperation in his voice. EYES OPEN! SAY SOMETHING! DO ANYTHING! I scream at myself, trying to get my body to move, But the pain takes hold of everything and my body rebels against me and wont do what I want it to do. All I can manage is a small moan of Pain.

         "I'm going to call 911 now ok? Please hang in there Hawk PLease for me" I hear him say. I try to tel him yes I try to reach out to him to hold his hand, but the pain is to much, instead I slip away. unable to hold back the unconsiousness any longer.
My Wife says that if I cant really talk about the night I got shot and almost died then I should try to find a waay that will help me cope. I oddly found writing it into a story helped. so I dont expect this to be any good or for many people to like it. I just needed to get this off my chest. (Shot december of 2013) Twittle is my boyfriend.
August Dec 2012
In my efforts
to surpress
all of the
bad things,
I accidentally
suppressed
the rest too.
I am such an unloving person.

© Amara Pendergraft 2012
conor moroney Dec 2009
I fill my days with pointless clutter,
                                   bits and bobs, and nevertheless,
My head alive with constant flutter,
                                    (marring softly to surpress)
Is still in streaks of wonders utter,
                                     breathing, blinking and even less,
Plighted to a world another,
                                     a starving corner he cannot bless
****....the....
New age rappers
Nigguhs sounds like slaves
Tryna bring plantations
Back
Aint no power in owning gats ?
Stupid nigguhs
Talkin' hard
But scared to pull the trigger
In the 90s we talked about silly ****
Drugs n **** but
Along with commentaries
Now it seem the young revolts only
See the cemetery early
If you catch on early
To the ******* two ******* to the pulpits
How can i follow God when im a God?
Image of a man dont understand
Confusion was made from us
But since i got no heart
I got no one to trust
But myslef so **** the drug cartels
Snitches ******* glitches
N ******* who was sent from Hell
Is it me or the industry?
Trying to take away black males masculinity
Women is the new men
I say **** that !
Men hold yo guard
And bump that !
New age ******* out the way
Cuz if you stay wit it the courts will say
You cant do this or that
But i fire back
Wither it be clinched fist or
Firin' a gat
Dont care the game is changed
Nigguhs sellin' out for a lil fame
Got everybody actin' black?
Cultural Jacks?
Spittin' wack tracks now thats a fact?
How is em deemed the rap god ?
When **** was handed to him how odd?
Is that ignorance is bliss
What happened to the real lyricist
Most will think of this as a diss
Dont care i stop n stare
Lookin' into the eternal sunshine
I see marley easy pac n biggie
Speakin' to me
Through the blunts n Hennessey
Maybe im passed drunk POD'd
Or is just me reachin' a new spirituality
Reals labelled fakes fakes labelled real
Now nigguhs dont even ****
Only over mass appeal
Tight dresses lookin' gay muslims
And the media loves to surpress us
We still joking about slavery
Butwhat would happened if they came to present day
And i seen one of the slaves with a cut off foot Would he laugh?
At us sayin' nigguh or will he provoke a bloodbath?
Smile now ya **** sho will cry later
Im not a hater just an intellectual debater
And if you got beef with me
Line up but its going to cost ya
Cuz aint nothing for free
So to my trues paying they dues
To society do ya time quietly
And when you break out time due
Im going to send the crew
Minorities against the world
Silence the elite soon to delete
There souls off the atmosphere here me clear
Dont ever fear
A nigguh that breaths the same air as you
******* gone do?
When them.boys in blue come for you?
Imma stay heavily heated and bust shots
Til the judicial system departed
Put a strain on there chain links
Now im spiritually awarded

Kida Price Aug 2014
Morning rise
Stretch the spine
Feel the pop of the breaking line
Resurfacing my present mind
Let it bubble and burst with rhyme
My internal clock is full of wasted time
And still I turn and look to find
The worth of all my past behind
I have no use of paper promises
Currency and it's lifeless uses
Savings accounts leave my memories
Unaccounted
And still I work these back breaking hours
And live a life of clocking in numbers
Seconds and minutes
Hours and day
Weeks and months
And years fly away
Leaving my intentions all the same
If I'm stagnant it would be a shame
Because every morning chime
I awake wishing for change
Insert some new pictures into my mental frame
And as I stand to the occasion
I find myself lame
Looking in the mirror somedays
To see if I have held myself at bay
Teetering from good and bad
As I see my image in disarray
Parting with the games I'd play
Replace them with a more responsible sway
Just tired I guess
Of cleaning the mess
Of picking up pieces
The wounds I would dress
Coddling those who never surpress
Their wants or needs
To my generous caress
Family and friends
Seems to be ever distressed
And still I reach out
My lips, I'd press
It's never a question of more or less
It's only my time and money I choose to invest
Smile through the trials
Grin through the pain
Go to sleep and have the strength
To wake the next morning
And do it again
Jamie Lee Aug 2013
My heart has loved many times,
Also spoken in many rhymes,
But my truest love is for you-
the strength that gets me through.

Time and time, I have said;
I love you, dearest ed,
But you will never understand,
For me, there is no other man.

The love I feel is too much,
And yet, I can't get enough,
So I will say it once more;
it is only you that I adore.

You may tire of these words,
and even think I am absurd,
but I can't surpress my heart,
as you gave me a new start.
Written on 2013-08-17 // Copyright ©2013 Jamie Johnson.
jeffrey conyers Dec 2012
We all have it.
We just try to surpress it.
We all have standards.
We just live up to them.

To the mistress.
We have a commentary about them.
Except if given a chance.
Some man would try to be with them.

To the prison that commits a crime.
We truly lay into them.
Without realize one bad choice of a decision.
Will have us being a inmate next to them.
Mistakes we make them.
And in many ways we hate to be judged.
Just ask their family.

We no moralist.
Well outside church we aren't.
We only show our moral hyprocrisy.
When we're around the minister preaching.
Where we nod our heads to anything said.

But pay attention to truth.
Even they aren't firm on things.
When dealing with God's creation.

The commandments are strictly guidelines to abide by.
We very aware that many will fall to the side.
It's just our moral hyprocrisy code we go by.

It took a brave soul to assist the soul lying at the road.
The Good Samaritan's that we all seems to know.
Those in position just passed him by.
Maybe it just was the sign of the time.

We still see this in the priviledge.
Who still tries to judge the poor?
And the word states, they shall inherit the earth.

Words to the wise that states so much.
Tell me if I'll survive this tragedy
Will I be more than just a casualty?
For this war in me is raging
Ripping me in half
I can't find a safe haven,
in which to hide
All the hate in me makes me cry
Everyday I just want to die
Try to clear my mind but,
thoughts of suicide
It won't even feel like...
I'm taking a life
Everything in me has already died
Surpress all the hurtful memories
Forced into the darkness deep in me
Bury it until it kills me
Bury it until they bury me
Ravenlimit Mar 2015
Your stare burns at my flesh.
Biting my lip I try not to blush.
The fact that you are starring only makes me hot.
Turning the sensations within my ***** into a continuous motion.
The thoughts begin to surpress my mind.
**** I think to myself.
Exactly, ****.
All I want in that brief moment.
Push me against the wall while holding my arms up.
Own me.
Pull my hair and **** my chest.
Just **** me.
Are these thoughts some sort of test.
No longer able to remain still my legs begin to quiver.
Biting my lip, I long for your lips down on my lips.
One quick shiver.
Fancy Dec 2014
In the corner of the room was a human figure
Its body motionless and calm
she looked like a sleeping beauty waiting for her prince charming to come
but who knew that all she was trying was to surpress the surge of emotions inside her
the anger that boiled in her veins on seeing him with her
her beloved fairytale
had now turned into a nightmare
and in that particular moment she felt it
felt something that was inexplicable.
Luisa C May 2016
I don't want you, I say
as I stare longingly at my screen for
a message to appear with a certain name
that does things to me.

I don't want you, I say
as the tips of my fingers tingle
and my heart becomes a drum,
the soundtrack to your entrance,
to the live wire my body becomes.

I don't want you, I say
as I surpress a cry
when your watchable lips mutter a bye
and I feel empty without a presence
of something I can't get myself to say,
is a pleasance

I don't want you, no, not at all
Not only because I can't admit it
(Too proud and afraid to say another person makes me whole
That I become needy without control)
But because that it's not true
I don't want you -
I need you, and
Owning you is all I think
I'm able to do
Elouise Roux May 2012
What I surpress is,
A Passion not openly
Discussed as desired.
Jelle Lerutte Mar 2016
I've come to the point
To the crossroad
of my chosen path
Choices surpress me
Letting go feels wrong
Carrying on feels wrong

The choices between past and future
pulling from all directions
Dividing me in all directions
You can see my pain quite vividly

As I look at the path ahead
Turn my head and look a little while back
I feel torn apart

I feel a soft touch
A very familiar smell
A smile only one could have
Centering my every emotion
A balance I only knew from a distant memory

I look at the path where I stand.
And suddenly the pieces fall together.
This is not my stop
But this is where I step off
This is where I let now decide

We put on foot in front another
slowly walking to what nobody knows
But this is exactly where I need to be
Not my stop
But almost , and quite clearly
Something what some people call
Destiny.
ZWS Feb 2014
I walk through the cold to see you on your break
I climb through these mental obstacles to be with you, christs sake
They call this **** love, but when I'm left to my thoughts
Everything comes to shove

I told her I want her to be free, that the door on the cage was left wide open
But a few months passed and I started calling her mine
And I couldn't help but close that gate and surpress her ambient shine
I just wanted her to myself, I wanted to drown myself in her love, I wanted to be the only one to see her at her best

See in the beginning I wanted everything for you, and when you opened up to me all I wanted was everything about you to myself, you don't get to choose
See in the beginning I was a stand-up guy, I had funny jokes, little punch lines, and a thing for you, I had everything you wanted, and I knew that.
I abused that, baby, I abused that.

I want you to be free, but you see, I have some problems with me.
I have a problem reconciling my path with yours in this ocean.
Because where in the hell is my compass when every direction looks like North
Where are we, and where are we going
I couldn't make you walk the plank, but maybe you'll just jump overboard

And in the beginning I told you it'd be rough waters
And maybe I knew you weren't the most skilled of sailors
But at least I had faith in something
Simpleton Oct 2017
I've only known you for 3 years
There's so much you don't know
Only scratching the surface
Friendship pleasantries
All I tell you are the pleasantries
Sometimes the dark gets too much
The past gets too deep
And sometimes I lose myself in it
I want to talk
I want to be with you and forget
But it's like my lips have sworn an oath
And I don't know how
Or where to start
Worse
How to deal with your reaction
So despite our closeness
I bear it all alone
All the sad and ugly kept inside my stomach
I don't know how to hide it at its peak
When the eyebags are pools
And I bleed from my fingertips
When my body trembles
And my lips are sore
So I hide from you
It's easier this way
Easier to say my battery died
And my charger broke
Sometimes I raise a shaking finger
To your contact on my phone
Stare at the delete button
But you're a good friend
And I love you
So I wait it out
Untill I surpress everything from the time before you
Untill I can smile and see you

This is why
I disappear from time to time
James M Vines Feb 2021
They cry about injustice but then want to persecute the rest of us. They say they don't have enough, then they destroy others property. They demand that the government give them equality , but then try to take away what makes us free. Civil rights are only for those who are woke, it might be funny but it isn't a joke. Our leaders aren't what they used to be, they are now friends of tyrany. If we don't say what they want to hear, then they surpress free speech everywhere. Without one nation under God we are divided. So the die is cast it has been decided. Through lies and subversion they have cut down the tree of liberty. You can only be right if you believe what they say. Free will has been taken away. Can it get worse, yeah you bet! Tell me are you WOKE yet?
SHE Oct 2017
Scarier and scarier it gets
Heavier and heavier the feelings get
Harder and harder it gets to breathe,

Tighter and tighter the constriction gets
Louder and louder it speaks
Darker and darker the shades gets;

Consumed with so much
Like quicksand that sinks
You start fighting but keep sinking.

You scream, but can't be heard
You smile with your mask on
You stopped crying, but tears keep falling,

You stare blankly
You see nothing
Feel nothing;

Within that darkness
I see how horrifying, how destructive and how poisonious i can get.

I plead with myself to surpress it
To not let her out
To not bring her out,

For she will never be stable
She will never stop
She will destroy everything;

The demons she has are much worse
And everyday, she whispers
"I will come out."
Darker shades of #SHE
i am a tornado
just a whirlwind of emotions
knocking down and destroying things
taking everything with me
because i self destruct
from all the emotions
i surpress from myself and everyone
Maria Williams Mar 2016
I live, but struggle to breathe.
I fight an endless losing battle.
The outcome will always be the same.
Death will take us all away.
In the end, nothing really matters.
Memories become void.
Emotionless emotions become the normality of an existence that is so lost and broken. Its all one big facade. Shaken from the past, too afraid to fly. Too afraid to live, too scared to die. Stuck in shades of grey. There is no left or right, black or white. It's a constant moving force of one foot in front of the other. Holding tears back, in fear of ruining the make up on my eyes that you never let me wear in the first place. It's struggling and fighting against yourself to not pick up that knife. Slice. Slice. Slice. It's a song on repeat in the back of my mind. Cryptic words and mind ***** only lead to future cuts and blood. That's how I allow myself to feel. For the tears to be able to flood. The panic sets in, once again. For the sake of everyone else, never minding what's good for me. For the sake of everyone else's sanity. And I hide and play my part like the good daughter, like the good family member that never gets spoken to. Like the good person I pretend to be. But all the hate I have is always directed toward me. I hate every single one of you *****. I don't want your ******* love. I want you to leave me alone. I don't want compassion or pitty or pleasantries. I'm used to getting ***** in my ******* dreams. Don't be nice to me. Feed my soul With what it deserves; hurt, make me ******* scream. I scream inside every day. I claw myself from the inside out, beating and breaking my rib cage to stop my heart from constantly pounding in my ears. My eyelids are heavy now, because I guess you should know I'm an addict too. Anything to surpress the void, or the feeling, or anything at all. Anything to stop everything. This numb feeling is what I need to get by. This numb feeling is my best friend in life. This numb ******* feeling actually makes me feel alive. All I really am is dead inside. Which actually poses a question to all my conquests; what was it like to **** a corpse?
Sitting here indecisive if im hungry or not
Mentally battling if i should eat or starve myself
I consciously have a weak and frail thought however the idea is too big to ignore
To ignore the fact that , while i play around with my gift of choice, there are people "out there" who don't have that luxury of choice but to starve
That there are people who would be grateful even if gifted with crumbs of anything
Is this even something I should be thinking or just stop wasting time and be eating, I ask myself
The thing is this is eating me up deep in thought
Knowing that thinking and not acting is only dreaming
I decide to starve myself in their respect
Still, that if using their name to ease my guilt by starving myself will solve anything
However they are litteraly starving and still a matter of choice
What do I do, where do I begin, I ask myself
I won't let anyone surpress my progress of my baby step
This just in
Tess burton Jul 2019
Easy like the girl nextdoor
Red rows side by side
Each one on the virge of divide

Silver sparkle
Gliding  sensation
Most damaged have the temptation

Cold cuts oceans deep
Desperate for it to surpress the next beat
Longing for each breath to be the last
And once they've past
Their cycle is through
But the drip of damage
Flooded through me and you

— The End —