"cal" poems
Crafty, they say, He's getting crafty
crafty with my lies and my made-up meals
crafty with my sound-blocking tactics
crafty with hiding the burning lines of white and red.
Baking, they say, He's getting into baking
baking my binges
baking my restriction
baking my omad
baking my sad-looking low-cal low-fat low-sugar low-carb high-protein
'meal'.
Crochet, they say, He's getting into crochet
crocheting ankle warmers to make my legs look skinny
half-finger gloves in an attempt to curb the permafrost that has begun to
knit itself around my bones.
Healthy, they say, He's getting healthy
as i workout until i faint
and do sit-ups until i have bruises on my spine.
fruit and veg and vitamins take priority
and suddenly i have taken an interest in running.
Sep 18, 2022
Sep 18, 2022 at 12:40 PM UTC
The rooster sings to the sun,
answering the call is the light that embraces all.
All at once the birds sing their own song.
Awaken by mother's sweet voice.
"It's time to go" she says.
She hands me a green cubeta con maiz.
The corn's color is purple and white instantly
I fall in love with its kind
The cold blue morning gives me chills.
I carry the bucket to my grandmother's house.
With her mandil and her braided hair,
she sits by the comal making tortillas.
"Good morning abueltia" with a smile on my face.
"Good morning m'ija" she replies.
I keep walking carrying the heavy bucket.
A small room next to a store crowded with senoras.
Their rebozos around their heads and arms and buckets in hand.
I feel so small so young but inside I'm proud.
I wait in line as I greet and make small talk.
These ladies have the nicest smiles.
My turn, I grab my cubeta and proceed to the molino.
My arms are too little.
A lady approaches and helps me load the molino.
I watch in awe as the grains turn in masa.
I bend down and collect it.
"En una bolita" the lady tells me to shape it.
I nod and continue to make it.
Gray like the color of my grandma's hair.
soft like my mother's hand.
I fill the bucket with the masa.
I thank las senoras and head back to mi casa.
I hand the bucket to my mom who was milking la vaca.
She starts the comal and gets the cal.
Her hands slapping the masa like she was clapping.
Perfect big round warm tortillas.
I was a little girl that helped her make them.
A little girl that still remembers.
Apr 17, 2015
Apr 17, 2015 at 5:24 AM UTC
Sa sarili noon ay aking nasambit,
Sa pangarap ko, wala nang hihigit
Sa buhay na ito, wala na ring nais makamit
Kundi ang pangarap ko na sana'y masapit
Ngunit nang narinig ko ang tinig **** kayganda,
Ako sa iyo ay agad nahalina
Sa puso ko'y nabuhay muli ang pag - asa ,
At mula nun' ninais kong ikaw ay makita
Ang iyong kanta kung pakinggan ay anong sarap !
Mas maganda siguro kung aawit sa aking harap
Sa malamig na tinig mo,lahat ay naaakit
Sa mga larawan mo, mata ko'y tila nadikit
Oh mahabaging langit! kailan kaya makikita
Itong talentadong tao na iyong nilikha?
Autograph nya kailan ko kaya makukuha?
O masilayan man lang maganda nyang mukha?
Pakiwari ko'y mahaba pa ang aking tatahakin,
Sa pera ko'y marami pa ang dapat ipunin,
Kaya't sa ngayon, ang akin nalang gagawin,
Sundan sya sa facebook twitter at ig narin!
At bago ko ito wakasan,
Isang salita ang nais kong iwanan
Di pa man kita nasisilayan,
Mamahalin ka sa tahimik na paraan.
Alam kong malabong ako ay mapansin,
Dahil marami ang mga katulad ko rin,
Ayos lang! Basta't lagi **** tatandaan
May isang CRISSEL na handa kang suportahan.
At kung loloobin man ng kapalaran,
Itong tula'y iyong mapakinggan,
Sana ikaw ay masiyahan,
Magdulot sa iyo ng konting kaligayahan.
Hindi ko alam kung may pagkakataon
Na magkatotoo ang aking mga ilusyon,
Pero tandaan mo sadyang mahal kita
Sa puso't isip ko tunay na nag - iisa !
Mar 10, 2017
Mar 10, 2017 at 12:52 AM UTC
When the world around me
feels like a black hole
Energy goes in
But does not come out
What does that mean?
How does God cal me to be
Gentle?
Humble?
I know patience is the key
But how?
Why?
What does this stagnation help?
How long must I wait --
To see gifts used more fully?
To move into the light?
How do I challenge myself,
encourage myself
To keep on,
to stay optimistic
to keep alive the passion?
How do I know
When to sit?
When to act?
How do I remain in patience?
I feel like I'm biding my time
waiting until things
"really happen"
And yet, I know God is working
Now
Forming me and others
How do I let the patience guide me?
Feb 23, 2015
Feb 23, 2015 at 12:50 AM UTC
You only live once
Is that not obvious enough that we needed to turn it into a catch phrase
We all have one life to live so why dissipate it living out someone else’s dream
Live out your dreams and not theirs
Every second we get closer and closer to death
It’s a very short time
So make every second worth it
Make life unforgettable
Be rememberable
Some people think after all you only live once you have to go out and do berserk ****
Skydive, bungee jump, eat a five pound 1,000+ cal burger
There is nothing wrong with going out and doing berserk things
But life is short and don’t you want to live long enough to see another day?
Every second we get closer and closer to death
It’s a very short life to live
So make every second worth it
Make life unforgettable
Be rememberable
We all want to live life to the fullest
But don’t you want to grow old with the person you love?
Watch your {great}grandchildren grow before your eyes?
You will never get there if you live your life in the most audacious and “cool” way
Go get a tattoo, one that you may or may not regret later
Go vacation somewhere where you can really experience the worldliness of the culture
Go vegan or do something life changing
Every second we get closer and closer to death
It’s a very short time
So make every second worth it
Make life unforgettable
Be rememberable
YOLO you only live once
And we all know that so start a bucket list, at a young age
Put things on it that make you aggrandize your comfort zone
And things that help you realize who you truly are
Don’t forget to take care of yourself otherwise you will not live long enough to complete it
Every second we get closer and closer to death
It’s a very short life to live
So make every second worth it
Make life unforgettable
Be rememberable
Yolo
One life to live
One chance to make it
One chance to leave your mark
Aug 2, 2013
Aug 2, 2013 at 2:56 PM UTC
Tory Lanez
Drake
The Weeknd
PartyNextDoor
Post Malone
ILoveMakonnen
RDGLDGRN
Kyle
G-Eazy
Rae Sremmurd
Future
Travis Scott
Lana Del Rey
Bryson Tiller
Jhene Aiko
Cal Scruby
Twenty-one pilots
The Neighbourhood
Zayn Malik
Jimi Hendrix
Nina Simone
Damian Marley ft Nas
Stephen Marley ft Wyclef Jean ft Nina Simone (Song:keeper of the flame)
No-Maddz (Song: Shotta)
Jesse Royal
Dec 29, 2015
Dec 29, 2015 at 8:51 PM UTC
I can still smell your cheap cologne on my bed,
On my CAL hoodie
And in my hair.
I don't know how I tolerated you for so long
Your hands were always ***** and covered in car-grease
Sometimes your hair was too messy
And your eyebrows were uneven.
We had nothing in common
You were a liar
And It was my passion to expose the truth.
You were bottom class
I was a famous superstar.
High school dropout mechanic
Honor student debater.
But somehow
In some way
Your smile
captivated my heart.
And you and I were one.
Sep 4, 2012
Sep 4, 2012 at 4:31 AM UTC
I find my self bordering between a Brandeis Blue and a Bright Cerulean,
Not too brilliant like Turquoise, but yet
I don’t find myself as dull as the Cadet shade, nearly Grey.
Although, depending on the circumstance I can exude a shade of Chartreuse,
Which leaves others a bitter Cal Poly Green,
A color which looks terrible on anyone.
My favorite shade however, is of bright Ruby
Brilliant and fierce in all its color, but can suddenly change in one swift mix.
With Black it becomes a tainted ashen Rouge, spoiled and rotten with grief and distaste
Bubbling under your skin, turning into a fiery rampage
Rather than becoming pinkened with a serene Pearl
A complement to the Ruby, flushing it with hearts desire
Soothing it too a point of Lavender, then Boysenberry
And then finally,
Back to my Brandeis Blue.
Sep 28, 2012
Sep 28, 2012 at 11:18 PM UTC
* *If the people have nothing in common. . .
. . .then there can be no common sense.* *
Jan 30, 2017
Jan 30, 2017 at 6:06 PM UTC
my 3rd vice
my catalyst for food restriction
desperate to sooth my shattered self image
daily bombarded by airbrushed perfect female beauty
braking my image of beauty and showing my cellulite
followed by overloading information about fixing me
regular exercise, beauty routines and Cal restricted diets
insecurity the new female epidemic
we fight for women's rights
and threw the baby out with the bath water
a basic human need
unmet and exploited
our legacy
the English standard
geneticly out of reach for women of color
Feb 7, 2014
Feb 7, 2014 at 1:19 AM UTC
You have always found a way
to inflate yourself,
a thunderhead of you
a rainer upon parades
keeping your own side dry.
Praise your portolio,
record yourself accomplishing that,
but wait, there’s more of you
the lost boy
dressed as a hero.
The prison of ego comes first,
then the crippling psychic wounds
and the inevitable chaos
that just ****** you off
because there is just too much to manage
and you cannot do it alone
but you don’t dare tell anyone
so you fake it
and you don’t make it
and one day
while you are too busy
refusing to be grateful
for the awesome mystery of your own chi
a tagger defaces your BMW
in the parking lot of Whole Foods
and you weep into your tofu.
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013 at 7:28 AM UTC
Cal-i-fornia (verb) the state of being golden.
Can you see the way the sand sparkles on the shore?
Golden shards of glass, or broken dreams.
Who possesses the Midas touch now?
The crushed gates of Atlantis on our shores.
Aphroditic bronze goddess of the sea,
Hair blown by the breeze.
Sea air & salty &
more than anyone could need, or was used to.
Giant sequoias stand
As mighty and proud protectors
Behemoths of lifetimes past.
Explosion of seeds inside
Fireworks waiting to explode
Pinecones, little grenades of life.
Ghost towns reminiscent of the Wild West
Mining camps from the Gold rush days.
Tumbleweeds & reptiles & powder fine dust.
Some say the earth is red from the natives’ blood spilt, and sunk in,
Reality – Oxidation turns iron in the dirt to rust.
So that’s why Mars is red.
After a bad storm in San Diego
Dollars lie broken & shattered on the shore
A bankruptcy of marine proportions!
Just go see for yourself,
The sand dollar apocalypse.
We were echinoderms too.
Life gone dormant, and violent beginnings.
As if Calliope’s harp needed to be retuned,
Sun god, Apollo & Helios with his chariot in the sky
When did we become so heliocentric?
Solitary white cross on the hill.
Never did anything to harm anyone, yet they fear you so
Enough to try to remove you from our presence.
Mount Soledad, or their SOLEs-are-DeAD.
- You know San Onofre is a power plant right?
- Radiation, is that a problem?
- Only if you want to have kids or stay cancer free.
- 25 foot sea wall -- To keep the waves out, or the kraken in?
- 4,000 tons of nuclear waste, who’s gonna get rid of that?
Ghostly tendrils of death
Blown fifty miles down the coast.
They call it SONGS, how quaint.
A symphony of catastrophe.
The greatest arias of death and destruction.
Feb 19, 2013
Feb 19, 2013 at 12:19 AM UTC
you are my sister
despite the lack of blood relation
mi hermana de una otra mama
ok, so it doesn't rhyme
but so what?
remember the time
we went clubbing in new cal?
i felt like cinderella
on the stroke of midnight...
and "our" boys
funny that we called them that
they were never looking to be owned
but we had good times together
nonetheless
May 9, 2010
May 9, 2010 at 8:17 AM UTC
Mujer, yo hubiera sido tu hijo, por beberte
la leche de los senos como de un manantial,
por mirarte y sentirte a mi lado y tenerte
en la risa de oro y la voz de cristal.
Por sentirte en mis venas como Dios en los ríos
y adorarte en los tristes huesos de polvo y cal,
porque tu ser pasara sin pena al lado mío
y saliera en la estrofa -limpio de todo mal-.
Cómo sabría amarte, mujer, cómo sabría
amarte, amarte como nadie supo jamás!
Morir y todavía
amarte más.
Y todavía
amarte más
y más.
2k
When I let people down
I tend to feel real bad
Something big or something small
Always gets me feeling sad
Big deal or not so big
Still really gets me down.
I Started out with a smile
Then I was chilling with a frown.
The only way I let go of things
Is through the words that I write.
I'm just tryna apologise
For not showing up last night.
I'm sure, that you had fun
Memories made ,and celebrations done.
Either way, stay you.
Keep going after what you want.
And don't you stop until you see
Your name in lights, at MSG.
Keep being ambitious and passionate about what you do,
Cause not everybody's got your mindset, they're just passing through.
Never forget your strength in Christ
And live your dream regardless of the strife
So , stay humbled and stay blessed and remember,
You're nothing like the rest.
Oct 25, 2013
Oct 25, 2013 at 12:52 AM UTC
Mi alma era una choza cerrada a cal y canto.
Acaso no sabía ni de sol ni de luz,
E ignoraba así mismo del inmenso quebranto
Que sufrió en el calvario nuestro hermano Jesús.
Una queja tan honda como un lloro doliente
La abrió luego a la vida como un cáliz en flor.
Y fué un deslumbramiento magnífico y ardiente
A través de esa brecha que le hiciera el dolor.
Y ahora está mi alma abierta a cuatro vientos.
Fue cada sufrimiento una nueva ventana
Hacia los dilatados y puros firmamentos.
Era inhospitalaria, insensible y oscura.
Dolor abrió sus puertas y ahora de ella mana
Un gran haz de luz clara de infinita dulzura.
1.8k
Do they see that she is barley holding ground
Desperately holding to the bars, putting on the strong face
But she really just wants to cry out loud
She has tired for three years
trying to be cal, trying to be brave
all the while holding back the tears
She can't hold on much longer
and it pains me that they don't see
The talk and act as if she dont mind
But they cant be any wronger
Do they see the blacked covered eyes
streaked with eyeliner once she finished
crying on my shoulder
Do they see that all the hurt all their lies
causes me to hate them as if they insulted me with ******
Do they see that it's stupid, dumb and awful
to cause anyone to feel this way
Do they see that it's stupid, dumb, and unlawful
to cause anyone this pain
But i guess the don't see
and carry on like nothing is wrong
leaving her with the question
Do they see?
Oct 25, 2012
Oct 25, 2012 at 6:36 PM UTC
I remember, not so long ago,
i was someone else.
Someone I did not want to be.
But darkness,
Oh, my darkness -
it devoured me.
Once again.
The poisoned touch of yours -
an electric current,
running through my body.
I knew,
you wanted me for
one dance of the sheets.
Manipulated by the
romance of empty trees,
i could not leave.
Loving you was a way of self harm.
Jan 8, 2025
Jan 8, 2025 at 10:03 AM UTC
I'm a docder, pretty wizard, how d'ya like that?
I prescribe drugs, you just wear a pointy hat!
I ain't no Dr. Phil BS or Dr. Dre crap,
While you're busy casting spells, I'm savin' some poor old chap
Against me, you wouldn't stand a chance
I'm smarterer than you, and you just have a fancy stance
I'm a real life livin' docder
And you need me as a proctor
Just to drink some vodkar
And by now I bet you're wonderin' what ya just got in yer
Ya can't even rhyme
So why should I waste a single bit of my time
Fightin' with ma docder powers which are all so sublime
And here's a little gift
Before I shift
Back ta destroyin' all ya lyin'
Without even tryin'
It's a free little lesson
Better count it as a blessin'
Crap, wizard, that, warcraft and path
Don't rhyme, just do the math
And also by the way, you misspelled "WRATH!!!!!"
I can wear whatever I want, from my boots up to my hat
So, my little wizard, what d'ya think of that?
I can use anything, from a .50 cal to a bat
You just get a stick, and a stupid purple hat
I can eat 416 billion grams of fat
And cuz I'm a docder, I'd burn it off in nothin' flat
By just using a little brainpower to focus
All of my smartererness, against your hocus pocus
You could never mess with me
Or either docder buddy,
Jedingaling and Murly
You'd leave so freakin early
If we started a beef
So just can it, and save yourself the grief
Against Walsh, you would flee
And as of now, he hasn't even got his docder PhD!
Unlike me!
Yeah, try every fancy trick
And poke me with a stick
A docder can take any pain,
From a puny little stick to a saw with a chain!
And then the docder'd turn around and use an attack
And your whole puny world would fade into black
You are done
I have just won
CUZ I'M A DOCDER, SON!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jul 23, 2014
Jul 23, 2014 at 7:22 AM UTC
I put a baby inside
Of the belly of my Bonney lass bride
Twice
Say the ****** covered by placenta
Looking through her *** to deaths eye
She may live he may die
He may live I'll lose my wife
Through the cream pie I stare down death
Between her ***** holds hemorrhage and life
Bleeding down her c-section
The acreted blood sac could cause infection
Already has
My baby gave multiple blood poisoned hits to her kidney
He's already a fighter I think he'll beat me up. He's going to come out with bigger boots than mine, prolly a bigger ****
Hope they both make it.
I can't fix it
My hands are tied in the cervical opening, my minds wrapped in the emboli cal cord, and my fingers are twiddling thumbs nauseously in Beccas ******
I should take Lornhes place in the amniotic fluid and gag myself in the fetal position
Or I could do what no one does these days.
Be a man of character.
Show him passion, knowledge, courage, and integrity.
Be a Father.
P.S. Son. All dads are letdowns, when you read this one day. I hope I have done my best. I Love You.
Lendon Partain
May 14, 2014
May 14, 2014 at 8:34 PM UTC
Holy Spirit,
Tell Me what You Know
Today is a day of Miracles, according to Hafiz
And instead, I ask you for the listening Wisdom..
How can a friend, cherished and adored
be the knife that Mark Anthony sees,
the Hand inside the Soul of Brutus..
How?
All the world seeks the cure of single mindedness
the effects of cancer, Aids, Ebola
and yet does nothing to acknowledge the Word of Welcome held within them
There is more mystery here than could ever be in the fuel of a Rocket
Can You Hear the Pleasure of the Earth Rejoicing for Its Victory of Faith?
I can… It’s Beautiful.
And yet it was called single mindedness for many years
as She sat alone and cried for the destruction of her Being..
Even then the community rampage of the Sovereign Greed did not stop.
Witnessed by All, Ignored TRUTH of the Condemning ReBalancing
Have we given Up the Gift that Truth in Accusation Brings?
From Maraschino to My Lai Trial, you are just God’s Witnessing…….
Violence held, within the Intention of Pure Goodness
Your Devoted Presence is a Peace filled World
Cal Anderson, I always wondered as to your medal.
shall I call you Osiris ???
Thinking it undeserved,
I now hammer at the forge of my own being
and with apology, call you grateful LIFE
More than a victory of deserving,
Love's acknowledgement of Steadfast Being...
Life’s right to Justice on Her terms, not ours
Peace Holy Spirt.
for the Victory,
You are ONE.
Grace in Blessing
And So It Is.
Nov 20, 2015
Nov 20, 2015 at 8:08 AM UTC
Being divorced is not very much fun
Two kids, no dad, life on the run
A king-size bed with two pillows
But she’s sleeping alone
On a whim she headed East to the West
The Cowboy convention in Tucson
With her new boots and hat
And old friend Laura Lee, wearing a vest
This Hollywood screenwriter has seen them all
Jive city slickers with cell phones and new cars
It had been so long since she’d really been kissed
Her love life needed a punch, it could not make a fist
Samuel Dawson was born on and still lived on the ranch
He rode fence, chased cattle, is one studley man
With a soft streak as demonstrated by his craft
He works wonders with leather, why it was art
He too was lonely, this singular man
He’d cleaned himself up since his wife went and made other plans
For he had deserved it, so he sat hoping to sell
Wishing he’d find that artesian well
Stop the action, let me set the stage
There he sits at his craftsman’s booth
Underneath the canopy in the hot afternoon sun
Here comes Rebecca meandering along
She lingers and fingers his feathered and leathered strands
He smiles and she notes his mustache and tan
They talk, she will not turn away
Laura Lee shouts, “Let’s get on the way.”
This is where the story begins
One cowboy love that has no end
She’s still a writer on fine TV shows
Sam is the wrangler, whom everyone knows
Loves a lady who fancies parasols
On hot Summer days, who now rides a horse
Who no longer leads a half-finished life
Where western handicraft is everywhere in sight
And their love is on course
Some don’t understand, some don’t want to know
But bridges are built wherever you go
Even on land with no river in sight
When a cowboy finds love he succumbs without fight
The ranch is now located in Southern Cal
The fence he mends is picket, see for yourself
For I know them, and please call me Sam
She’ll be home in a few, I’m her lover man.
Dec 16, 2016
Dec 16, 2016 at 2:15 PM UTC
The killer awoke before dawn, he put his boots on
He took a face from the ancient gallery
And he walked on down the hall
J. Morrison
AR-15, 100 shot drum magazine
.40 cal Glock semi-auto
Full body armor, riot helmet
Yes, I'm ready for the show
Yes, after all those years
Being the good, smart boy
Getting good marks
Always being polite
Pablo has finally invited me
To the "Magic Theatre"
Now all the Steppenwolves of my mind
Begin to run, teeth dripping with blood
Laughing and howling as they begin the hunt
Power vibrates through me
To the throbbing of the weapons
The screaming of the prey
Until all the magazines are empty
And I'm left alone again
Just the police asking the meaningless questions
And far away the Steppenwolf
Runs through the shadows.
Jul 21, 2012
Jul 21, 2012 at 12:56 PM UTC
No...more...bickerin,
your eyes flickering you're nickering
your nit pickin' lost it quick as the Dickens
My tracks a hell of a kickin'
you're just the next feckin victim,
of the flow bound Hurricane of sense and rhythm,
The Sensemilla Sensei Kempei of verbal Kempo's home,
Like Alladin and Saladin mixed with a Party Boobytrap a Paladin of Palindrome...
The Storm rider glider blasts you through the other side of the Thunderdome
My - Spitfire drips Ire as ********* ***** fire Surprise in your eyes quick blast from the past from a .50 Cal Microphone-
Fiend in me soul under control you failed your roll,
will check failed-I check wills,its a Checkmate mate you-best quill your will and will to build some soul
Its a dill of pickle you're in - you're a nickle worth of Nickleback stickleback sticklebricking best Lego
I let go last, I'm the Legolas of the fast pass in the underpass stick you fast now you're stuck fast I buck fast at your glass of Buckfast
the Truculent, ever vigilant-words are Succulent got you diggin' in
diggin' out a liddle bit of Lidl in a stolen digger,move quicker stop the friggin' in the riggin' little Pigpen Pigeons time to drop the bridge in...
Mar 17, 2018
Mar 17, 2018 at 6:08 PM UTC