Fight and fight
Push and pull
Always running
Playing the fool

The stinging of tears
The hurt of heartbreak
I'll go back to you
For old times sake

Why do we play
Our little games
When the results
Are always the same

Tears and anger
"Love" and hate
You lure me
I take the bate

Crying and kissing
Bruises and bites
Close up the windows
Turn off the lights
We fall into pattern
Again and again
Falling in love
Falling in sin

We* often *Owned, what We don’t Own.
Being  Possessive, We become Invasive.

                 - We often Neutralize, what We can’t Realize.
                     - Full Realization comes after the Actual Destruction.
Creating our own Ending.



*© Pax

The night's cold.
Cigarette smoke's silken silhouette
on the steam trail
off my breath.
Defiantly shivering-
no, I will finish it
the cherry- red
down to the last futile drag
and me,
the only living thing
in earshot, breathing on
and godsbedamned
I sit
despite winter's frigid grip
just like snoop dog said-
smoke til the last hit
but I fired and missed
and there's something I missed here
though the air is all clear
and I can't hear anything
but a heartbeat-
beat-
beat-
under the empty stars
I penned these few bars
to keep my hands warm
to make the blood flow-
everything's hallowed and hollow
especially me.

The waves come crashing
Soon I am sinking, slinking down
Into the bottom of an ocean
My own eyes created
I see a few surviving, fighting
Off the unforgiving currents
While others just let themselves
Down, they let themselves drown
I am always hovering
In between the two
I can neither sink nor swim
I do not understand how one
Can win or lose a battle
Against their own mind
I guess time will tell how long
I can really hold my breath

Typing on a keyboard blindly imagining a new font
The scant canvas before me is intimidating
I relish the world I'm renovating
A new dawn gleaming it's way to my thoughts steady stream
Enchanting my mind like Aurora Borealis beams
It seems as though a victim was made by tracing lines through sand
Can it all be saved? Or is it a depraved, hopeless, sinking land?
Despondent while reciting lines my mind has bought
Simultaneously causing my blood cells to rot
Wishing for one blaze or spark of true inspiration

Pick up your tools and fix all you have wrought craven
Save it, reclaim it because no matter the end of this mess
You promised to light your candles entrenched in your best

The ****** of what my heart beats to in trance
Save one last Gypsy's moon dance for me
The once intoxicating chills now feel so *******
This wine drenched life is my last chance


Dear Sunshine:
There was a time when I wished that you would go away
Leave me to the hallow I burrowed myself in to keep me warm

Dear Starlight:
You left me with an eternal plight asking for your radiance to stay
When I feel the burn of your kiss catch the last flight

Dear Home:
Fallacy's throne upon which I sit left me conducive with fright
Until I learned how to fabricate sails out of wind and stones

Dear Family:
Can all of you see that even though I wayward roam
Snow leopards must protect ALL of those who are in need

Dear Friends:
I wish it didn't have to end, Sighing away the sown seeds
You live on by the ink on my skin as well as your mark that mends

Dear You:
Though I can't walk in your shoes, I'll trace the bends
...
and wind back around to lend you my heart in lieu

Dear Me:
All ahead that you perceive is binding together and tearing in two
...So tangible then are all the mad ramblings infinite
Said all the ephemeral wise men clearly.

Forever Alone is probably my fate
because I only found one that I'd be more than happy to call my mate
She would've been treated like a queen
And I'm being Oh so sincere
Idve treasured her so previously
And held her so dear.

But these are the pangs of unreturned affection
be careful where your heart goes it's prone to misdirection
I finally got up the nerve to tell her how I feel
she let me down easy, said she didn't want distance
I just wanted a girlfriend worth a ****,
But maybe that's not what I'm meant for it's

Like I get knocked down, or kicked around
no one sees the tears behind my mask of a clown
underneath my laughter lies years upon years of pain
Love forever eludes me
Cupid Probably laughs in my face, and spits on my head
knowing I'll be alone when they find me dead.