You want to be a child again
to jump above rainbow puddles
and stuff your mouth with pies

You want so much
to retrace your steps
back when it was as small
as the hope you have now

You want to be a child again
not because you'd rather be oblivious
not because you'd rather break legs than
your mind
not because of anything
except just be who you are
all you are
back before the world started
changing you

And none of them realize
The effort it takes to get out of bed
To go outside for the day
And face all of my fears
None of them realize
How tiring it can be
To pretend.

I looked in the magazines
And saw beauty.
So I changed myself
So the world would think I'm pretty
Because I thought everyone found me ugly.

But then I looked in the mirror
And I realized
It was me
Who didn't think I was beautiful
It was me
Who needed to accept myself.

Tread lightly on this path
Walked a long road from depression
To almost happiness.
Why?
Why must you come and ruin it
You've thrown boulders
Into my path
You've made me turn around
Heading back to the dark place.

I JUST WANT TO HEAR YOUR VOICE
She screamed out,
No one in the void seemed to hear her.
I MISS YOU
DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?
Oh, but she knew
She knew.
There was someone out there listening.
But they didn't think the screams were important.
They didn't see her screams as what they were-
A cry for help.
CAN ANYONE HEAR ME?
PLEASE ANSWER*
Please...*
The shouts turned to whispers
The whispers turned to sobs.
Then,
Silence.

Sitting in the dark
For how long?
I have no idea.
I have a plan.
Maybe if I sit here long enough
I can make time stretch out longer
I don't want another day to end
A kind of day that was meaningless
A routine
Being alive,
But not being "alive"
Been having those a lot.
Plaster a smile
Fake a laugh
Go home to be alone
Because alone is the best thing for me
Or so I think.

Maybe if I sit here long enough
I can make time stretch out longer
Maybe,
Just maybe,
Something might walk into my life tonight
And give my day meaning.

The way a candle dies amazes me
A strong tier of wax
Simple
With only a string within it
Dies slowly
As it gives off light
Melting wax
Drips and drips
Until all that's left is a puddle
It amazes me how
Something that gave off so much light
In times of darkness
Ended up finding itself
Sitting in the same darkness
It had tried so hard to enlighten.

I crawled into a new life
When maybe I should have jumped
Slowly lowering myself
Into the icy depths
When I should have taken a dive
So now here I am
Frostbitten and cold
I did this to myself

You walked by and never saved me
Because I wasn't drowning
You saw me standing in the icy water
And just assumed that I was fine
But if I had just jumped
If I had only taken that dive,
Then maybe you would have seen me drowning
Maybe you would have tried to save me.