The car slows down
and in the moment
so does the sound,
all I can hear is my heart.

The car stops and so do I,
as I start to cry
I let everything out
that was being held inside.

every thought ive ever had
every action ive ever taken
takes physical form
as a glass shard
it cuts my thumb
and it stings
the crimson blood is washed away
by the lack of regard
from a doctor
every glass shard is saved
kept in a box
in the corner of a room
it sits there
staring at me
every day
oh
how i wish
to set this box on fire
to run away
and buy a new box
but still it sits
and stares

I hope your phone dies and you lose your charger
I hope you get a bad haircut from your barber
I hope you get splashed by a passing truck
and after you get **** on by a duck
I hope your **** gets stuck
when you're ******* and zip up
I hope you confuse milk for bleach while eating your breakfast,
at least your white teeth will finally please the dentist
hope they switched your panadol for cyanide at the chemist
and nobody minds at all because who'd cry for a public menace?
I hope a car drives off the asphalt
and hits you while you walk
and nobody even stops to gawk.
and as you're dying, crows start to flock,
pecking your eyes out as they squawk
because it's all your fault
that my love is living in chalk
outlines on the sidewalk
and I tell you that every that time we talk

I know you know exactly how much I hate you
if you wanted to die I wouldn't dissuade you
don't bother saying sorry we know it's too late to
but they tell me that I really shouldn't blame you
because it's all my fault
that my love is living in chalk
outlines on the sidewalk
and I tell you that every time that we talk

you apologize,
but you show no real remorse
you only want an excuse,
to keep me in your life,
to manipulate me,
to hurt me.

you hurt me.

you make me feel stupid,
fat,
ugly,
worthless.
worthless.

I am worthless

you've taught me that I have no self value,
that I am good at nothing

my self esteem is gone,
you've taken it all away,
I'm watching it burn,
with the memories of you.

you.

I hate you.

Every time I'm really really messed up. You're drunk. You're so far gone and I'm so far away and yet so close to relapsing. My chest hurts and I'm afraid to fall asleep, the fear of my parrents finding out I'm gay and kicking me out. The fear that I have no where to go. And you're drunk. Thinking I'm okay, when in this moment my hands shake, trying to type out my distress. A cry for help if you will. I was crying really bad you said you would be there and you weren't

People  will laugh with   you then  stab you in back.  We  think they are  friends but all long they are wishing for  your downfall.  They use  your mistakes as bullets in a gun.  The sound of people talking behind  your back as  they smile to your  face.  It started  with hello but now it is time for  a goodbye.