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Marls Dec 14
Shellshock and butterflies
The drop of my heart when i see your eyes
The shake in my bones when i hear your laugh
Shellshock and butterflies
Never thought I'd say
Love at first sight

I bearly know your name
But can describe the colour of your eyes
Dark oak and honey bees
A labyrinth full of trees
I want to never find my way out
I run in circles, i never even try
I look and look but can't seem to find my mind

The sunlight, it shines in your eyes
But it doesn't hurt, the light
It's a cure for my starved sight

In the end you're just a stranger on the streets
You won't remember me
While i'll still be captured in a dream
I'd be lost in forstes of brown
And leaves falling down
A autumn wave of love carrying a sour note

What a view, know i miss it
You don't know me by my name
You won't remember my laugh or my eyes
But you're the muse
To my long lived love life

I'll admire you till im sick
Of watching you live in a bliss
Long after your memories turn to dust
Of me trying my very best to make you laugh

I want to know your worst secrets
What you dream of at night
The deepes dark of your mind
And the way your soul still shines
The way you act around your friends
Passionate discussions and soft embraces
Sober laughs and drunken talks

I want to know when you look in the mirror
and hate the sight
Caus baby i want you to be mine

Shellshok and butterflies
I meet your eyes i know you knew
I was caught in your air
I got addicted of your name
You won't remember me
But that's fine

As long as you let me use
your beauty as a muse
Emotions hidden in longlost words
And never said out loud thoughts
You live in my mind
Don't mind me borroring your time
In my imaginary land you'd notice me the same
You'd still think about the way
I left without saying goodby

Maybe one day we'll meet again
And you'll recognise the way my eyes brighten
The way my checks reden
When you talk and laugh
When you take my air and be yourself
Even though i don't know enough
And you couldn't be bother to learn
I still hope
One day we'll meet and when the sun catches you right
I'Il get to take a foto burned into my mind
To never forget that night
That day that feeling
When i saw your eyes
For the very first time

And maybe thats why
After shellshock and butterflies
I still look for a stranger
Wandering the streets, living there life
All the ******* time
I asked for forgiveness, but you pushed me away,
I wanted you to understand that we were both suffering,
but you left your scent on the sheets,
and I would give anything to be in your arms again.

The morning came, but it left me wondering-
How will I fill this void that you left behind?
The day stretches on, promises long
and I'm alone with no one to ease my mind.

I can't bear this loneliness, I miss you so much,
I have no one left to confide in, no tender touch.
I spend my days looking out the window,
Hoping, still hoping, to have you back by my side.

Everything is falling apart, I'm lost for words,
What will become  of me? The silence hurts.
I wait for you as if you'll come home once more,
But the memories haunt me, and I'm still at war.

I wish for time to make them fade away,
But the past won't leave me, and it's here to stay.
I think about you more than words can say-
Sometimes, I hear the sound of your voice, so far away.

The years pass by, and with them I see
How lucky I was to have you next to me.
I'll wait and I'll wait for as long as it takes,
Never stopped loving you - no matter what is makes.

In the darkness of night, I begged you to stay,
And since you've been gone, I've been lost in the grey.
Under my eyelids, your image is clear,
I was meant to love you - this much I hold dear.

It hurt me to hurt you, the pain still stings,
I've never suffered so much for anything,
But I don't want freedom, I don't want to be free
I just want to stay in the business of loving you, endlessly
Still lost...
If you seek a love,
That sits neatly, pressed smooth as linen,
I cannot give you that,  
Because true love -  is wild.
It is as untamed as fire,  
And it dances with the wind.  
It is a patchwork of wounds,  
Broken promises, mistakes and dreams,
It is heavy with the weight of unspoken things.
It is silent sighs stitched together in laughter,  
And tears like summer storms on cracked pavements.
Its is daunting daydreams and many sleepless nights woven into one another.  
  
And yes, our hearts will stumble,  
And fumble through shadows,  
Reaching for fragments of warmth and familiarity,  
Trying to carve paths to the past through the dark,  
And though the fabric frays like an old story,  
It’s there, in the seams,  
Where we discover a strength,
Raw and real colors that run but never fade,  
And at the end,
It’s in that flaw that makes love a beautiful mess,  
Its own wild masterpiece.

So if you see fit let us embrace,  
The snags and tears,  
Treating each thread as a testament to our journey unfurling.

Where there is chaos,  
There lies the heartbeat,  
Each pulse promising that we are alive.

And in that sacred noise, we find the truth,  
Cracked open and brilliant,  
A symphony of us....

-realness and rhyme
Maybe it a curse,
That unrequited is the only one to know me for who I am,
Maybe it’s a curse, that love and I aren’t meant to be friends
All the
Pretty guys with nice eyes always seem to overlook mine,
And I,
I always seem to stand to the side as,

My ghost on campus leaves with a goodbye that contrasts the simple hi

And the one with frame worth eyes, just lies

And what could’ve been no longer crosses my mind,

But the one from that Saturday night lingers around sometimes, but

Maybe it’s a curse or it’s a blessing in disguise,
That unrequited is a shield that guards me from the, pains and heart aches that the guys of this era creates

It has to be some sort of sick spell cast upon me like Maleficent did Sleeping Beauty,

But reject it as I may,
Maybe this curse is my saving grace
For As much heartache unrequited creates,
It saves me from the strongest hex called heartbreak.
The third of December is tomorrow,
And all I can think about is you, her, and where my sweater could’ve possibly vanished to.

I think of you because I liked what we had going on,
I liked the jokes, our conversations, the glances, and the implications.
I liked your beautiful brown orbs that belonged behind frames you refused to showcase them in, and the curls that hid them like curtains.

I think of her because that should be me.
What was between us should’ve landed me in her place,
And I think of my sweater.
My heather sweater that I’ve worn every third of December since 2020, because it’s cold out, and it’s sweater weather.

Heather has your sweater when I should be its “owner,”
Heather holds your heart when it should be in my hands,
And Heather is the mesmerizing sight that soothes your sore eyes,
While I stand to the side, and watch her pull the smile from you that I like to see.

Why would you ever implicate the thought of you and me?
Lead me to believe that you would pick me when Heather was the choice from the very beginning?

Now she has you, and the sweater that would always and forever be given to Heather,
It may be polyester, but ****, I wish I was Heather.
In honor of Conan Gray and Heather Day
Rose Nov 24
I was the moon,
terribly in love
with you, the earth-
always chasing,
but never caught up.

My biggest fear
came to pass:
you were gone.
And with you,
a rigid, broken piece
of my heart.

I unlearned you,
every part I loved,
forcing myself to forget,
as if telling the moon
to stop revolving
around the earth
was possible.
i wonder if you know you were my first love
Mahta Nov 6
With a boat made of hope
I'll go sailing
In the search of love
If my heart gets wrecked and crushed
From the storm of empty promises
I'll bury it in the depth of my chest
like treasures from a shipwreck
For you to find it and peace it back together
Cat ꨄ Nov 5
I hold on too tightly,
You tell me to ‘tread lightly.’
Fearful to let go,
you tell me “let’s just take it slow.”
you pull away;
I pull you close.

My nails sink deep into your skin,
You flinch away in pain-
I apologize,
Yet I pull you close again.

I kissed you too hard,
until your lips were blue and sore.
I ran my fingers down your back,
And made you bleed some more.

I kissed your neck,
Then you started to choke.
I held your face in my hands,
until it was fear I started to evoke.

I held you tight,
you started to suffocate.
I held on with all my might,
you continued to hesitate.

now I’ve lost you;

I hadn’t realized my hands had claws,
I had you clenched in my jaws.
If I could’ve just paused,
Maybe I’d seen the harm I’d caused.

Please understand what I have to do;
it was far too much to put us both through.

Now I keep my distance,
I couldn’t continue my persistence.
My kisses no longer linger,
like a bee whose lost its stinger.  

I stung you,
and pulled out my insides.

I won’t hold my lips to you neck,
or wait to hear your pulse.
I left us such a wreck,
I clung onto you like an impulse.

I held on too tightly,
until I had to completely let you go.
Now you’re just a pain that visits nightly,
you came in at a point where I was already at a low.

Why couldn’t I just take you slow?
Kim Seul Nov 5
When I speak of the desires of my heart, they designate it insanity,
yet what they'll never savvy is that just like the nature's care for naturity,
I, too, have cared for you, since the first time I came to see your quiddity.
Even so, you too will continue to see it as nothing but a boy's mendacity.

Watching the stars above yearning for happiness,
my extant soul slumps with despondence,
the melancholic glisten of the meandering clouds, an inefficacious prospect,
reminding me of my world, a life sans zest.

I still reminisce of the time we met, a starry night with a mesial crescent moon;
The Hour before the Holy, the ephemeral moment blessed by love, purity, and strength.
The enigmatic attraction I felt, the way my heart ached, begging to be united with yours, soon;
the daze I lost myself into, coupled with the way you took away my breath.

And I dare proclaim, that I cannot live without your voice;
your sweet whispers, accompanied by your smile.
The way you look at me, makes me rejoice,
in your eyes, I see a future worthwhile.
Your hairs flutter sound, alluringly,
engrosses me so naturally.

Yet, we stand here as friends, pretending to be nothing more,
the fear of rejection shaking us to our core.
I do think — think about you all the time,
but it cannot work, for I am a dime a dozen.

Would you still look at me, despite life’s horror?
For I vow to stand by you, never to depart,
In sickness and in health, for richer or poorer,
for better or for worse, till death do us part.
I gave the boy with the pretty frame-worthy eyes a pen the other day in class,

I switched the top of the black one I gave him to the blue that I used, and vice verse-a giving him a blue-black pen and me a black-blue one.

To him, in that moment,
I was just goofing off in class instead of listening to the teacher yap,

But to me, the pens and the colors meant something,
The day I made that blue-black pen, I was trying to make me and him,
The blue me, the black him, and together, us.
It was my heart,
And me giving him the blue-black pen was in a way, me giving him my love.

Maybe he missed the message in between the lines, or maybe he chose to by pass it,
Or maybe,
What I thought we had going on, was a delusion,
Maybe it was only one sided, and the connection was all in my head,

Perhaps I should’ve left the pens alone,
leaving my feelings unknown, and the lack of reciprocation would’ve hurt a little less,
But now my heart aches,
Especially whenever I see that cursed blue-black pen.
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