There’s something about keeping
wounds open that feels better
than letting them heal.

To have fallen so
unexpectedly
into the company of an alluring
stranger.

The all-consuming infatuation
with those azure irises
and their blinking
benevolence.

To yearn to hear
his voice
as he unravels words unto everyone
but me.

The kisses that
have fallen at the feet
of the pedestal
he stands upon.

To hear him speak of
her
with the same desire
that I
think of him.

To watch those azure irises
stray their attention
to her golden braids.

The silence
as it becomes a knife
that--
slowly--
kills me.

You sit only inches from me.

Every right turn's tragic momentum
Theatrically lunges you closer to me.
The smallest points of your elbow
Lightly brisk the top of my memory.

The tickle sends a shivering pulse
Between the blades of my back.
The knot of my neck is hardly strong,
But weakness has fled from my head.

The feelings emerged are nothing new,
But my feelings submerge about you.
Wondering how well you know me,
But how much more you know my friend.

The compassion of trust to a friend,
Verse the pressure of lust to a trend.

The car stops, my place is on the left.

Drunken kisses,
stolen looks.
Skipping beats,
doubting thoughts


But is there still a triangle for me to rage against?
Is there still some feelings there?
From you?
From her?
From me?

You wrote a song about her,
Will there be one for me?

N. Hedges

I see the way you look at her.
You can't deny the attraction.
Why don't you do the honors?
Subtract me from that fraction!

Cause our relationship is only half of what
it was.
You had me drunk on love but now I'm just
slightly buzzed.

A triangle
starts at a point
goes toward
two other points.
But who's to say
it doesn't begin
at two points
which meet
at one point?

I've digressed to a point where I can't appreciate
making every decision with logic, without fail;
That's something I could never imagine I'd hate.

There was a time when my anger had a point to illustrate;
Now I curse and condemn and convey to no avail.
I've digressed to a point where I can't appreciate.

There was a time when my anger would not abate;
Now my cool and calm demeanor has learned to prevail.
That's something I could never imagine I'd hate.

There was a time when his endless curiosity, I'd sate;
Now his tirade of questions is aimed at another male.
I've digressed to a point where I can't appreciate.

There was a time when his mere image would aggravate;
Now my spirit holds not the anger his proximity should entail.
That's something I could never imagine I'd hate.

There was a time when I could be near and not disintegrate;
Now at the very sight of these two men, needs must I quail.
I've digressed to a point where I can't appreciate,
And that's something I could never imagine I would hate.

You play him
You lead him on
But I know you feel threatened by me
For uttering a rude comment about me
When I walk by
It only makes me smile
Because I know you know
I never made him cry
I only made him smile
And I have never broken him
The way you did so many times
He came to me and said "I want to die"
Three minutes later he was laughing
I made him forget how you hurt him
Because I am the band aid to his pain
And if I can never be more than that
I will be content with healing the wounds you inflict
For as long as he'll have me but I know
You are threatened because I am the better choice
I am honest and trustworthy and I would never hurt him
And though he cannot see
How good to him I'd be
Because your hands are holding his face
In fear he'll turn around and see me
I swear I will stand here for as long as needed
Until your hands get cramps
And your face crumbles to reveal the person you are
Your fingers will fall and he'll turn around
I will be here to see him move away from you
And closer to me

You are not lying to her
As much as you are lying to me

I adore you with no guarantees
I hear promises that have not been said
I hear your words said in my head
Yet you say “only you”
Only me
And her

Only You & Her

Never Us

Never were

Never will

Just this far will do down the road of pride-filled infatuation
With its ill-lit way
It goes in no direction
We either run into each other
Or run away.