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Ali Jan 2022
death beckons
and i long
for sweet release
from dreary song

old friend
or friendly foe
merciful end
i want to go

death is memory
not unkown
merely forgotten
as we've grown

looking back
looking ahead
mirror image
t'was always dead

universe
one song
eternal curse
to go on and on

ringing round
in my head
no escape
wish i was dead
Persephone Jan 2022
To all the ones who didn’t make it,
Tell me are you finally at peace?
Did the weight of the world truly leave you be?
I’m simply asking because I am one of the ones who did make it
And wonder what would have happened if I didn’t make it?
Has the addiction to be perfect stopped eating you from the inside out?
Or the need to please everyone, by now surely that drive must no longer be around?
To all the ones who didn’t make it, tell me it got easier?
What about the voices, the voices in your head that could never be drowned out, the voices that always told you “you’d never be good enough” for the love of god tell me they finally listened, tell me they finally shut up?
And are you still able to feel numb to all the hurt?
That you don’t have to fight the cravings any longer? Tell me, tell me there is no harm to just giving in?
Tell me, tell me please
To all the ones who didn’t make it, tell me how it was worth it?
Or would you rather ask me first?
Would you rather ask me how warm the sun feels on a lazy august afternoon?
Because you can’t seem to remember what that feels like any longer
Or if the roses still bloom with the promise to smell sweet and to bring the honey bees around?
You’re starting to forget what they look like
What about chocolate you ask, is it still known to melt in your mouth and bring a smile to your face?
At least that is what you think the rumours you heard say
And is laughter with loved ones truly contagious?
It’s been a while since you’ve done it yourself
You go on to ask about blue skies and cozy rainy days
Old teachers that made you fall in love with learning and the ones you’re happy you’ve forgotten about
We discuss friendships new and old and how far they’ve come sadly in your absence
And when I’ve answered all your questions you finally agree to answer mine
But I simply smile and say,
To all the ones who didn’t make it, may you please forget I ever asked?
Cynthia Jan 2022
Have you ever drowned before...?
Have you ever been scared that you might?
Have you felt the water wash over your face,
and watched as mid-day fades to night?
That is what depression feels like.

It starts with swimming too far out
and suddenly realizing you're caught in the waves.
But before you even begin to drown,
the panic settles in as you picture your grave.

You cry out for help,
and struggle for one deep breath,
but the waves are strong
and the water is deaf.

You start to reminisce
about all the memories shared
with the ones you love so much.
You realize that you're scared.

At this point as you're drowning,
all hope seems to have disappeared.
Now you await death alone,
thinking your conscious is clear.

But instead of deadly waves,
It's just you and a gun.
You think this is where the drowning ends,
but it's only just begun.
Nikita Dec 2021
Today, I stood underneath the bridge.
I looked up at how high I was going to fall in.
My eyes still hurt now from the tears I cried.
“No one cares about you” a voice whispered.
A loud ‘DING’ frightened me, it was followed by an annoying vibration.
They were calling me. They were worried about me.
I didn’t want to be under the bridge today.
The whisper led me here.
They tell me that once I’m gone, everything will be easier for everyone.

Then I think about my brother with no home.
My boyfriend left alone.
My siblings with no middle sister.
My class with no teacher.
My flatmates with no rent.

It would only be easier for me.
So I carry on, hoping that one day I’ll feel less empty.
William Kline Nov 2021
When you said goodbye to me
I immediately welcomed depression back into my life
Pretty soon I’ll be at deaths gate
Waiting for him to welcome me, next
Arden Nov 2021
Every ma'am
Is the tightening of a noose
Is the sharpening of a blade

Every shower
Is the collection of pills growing
Is the note being revised

Every she
is a punch in the throat
Is one step closer

One step closer to the end
Because I cant wait to not feel this



But then I get called sir
I get called them
I get called him
And it's one step back from the rope
One pill flushed
One note ripped up
One more day I will stay alive
Because I love that feeling
Natalie Nov 2021
I'm afraid.
I'm afraid of my mind.
I'm afraid of the depth, of what I'm capable of.
Of what my brain can imagine or focus on.
I'm afraid of the thoughts that come flooding in,
and I'm afraid of the ones that break down the walls.
I'm afraid, for I feel too much,
and I'm afraid that one day
I won't be able to take it all.
N Aug 2021
On a night like this,
long ago,
I promised to die

I carried this heavy promise
in my scarred wrists
in my empty stomach
in my black lungs
in my sleepy eyes

I wish to finally sleep,
but I fear I may never
dream of you this time
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