I let you step all over me.
And I let you **** on my authority,
But I guess it's just my place.
What ever happened to earning the key?
Now I'll never escape this insanity
But I deserve it.
Because I ***** about the politics
And fight harder even though I've got the world licked
But I'm a street fighter in an arcade game
Playing the same jukebox melody
That annoys you the the point of suicidal tendencies.
I'm the chick in the corner shooting down advances
Because the boys have never read Palahniuk.
I'm a ******* waste.
And what's with all the haste
If I'm going nowhere?
It's such a shame.
I was on top of my whole world.
Now I'm throwing drinks in the face of life
But ignorant moves like that won't end the strife I feel.
But I tell you, I'm just like you.
Trying again and again though I **** up each time
And it's true
That I don't know where I'm going but
At least I'm on my way.
And I'm gonna stay
In the hell I've built inside this bed tonight.

at night the insomniacs come out to play

they grab fistfulls of their hair and howl at the moon.

The effects of sleep deprivation on the mind
Sometimes depression,
Sometimes bliss,
Inability to focus
Yet the mind rests exactly where it needs to be
I wonder if it is better to remain sane and neutral
Or insane, suffering the ups and downs of emotional detriment?

Let me tell you the story of how both of us had problems sleeping, but once we started texting, the darkness didn’t seem so long and lonely.  Let me tell you how I would stay up until mere hours before work or sometimes all through the night, not being able to sleep and not really wanting to.  Let me tell you about how going to sleep meant facing the disappointment of waking up again the next morning.  But let me tell you, baby, how I loved learning about you and how we traded questions to get to know one another.  Let me tell you about the one time we talked on the phone until you fell asleep, and I just sat there for a minute and listened to you, then whispered oh so quietly, “I love you” before hanging up.  Let me tell you about the time you told me that you’d never looked forward to texts so much in your life, and how I felt the exact same way.

I don’t want to sleep
There are too many noises
(Too many voices)


The tick 

Tick 

Ticking of the clock

And the silent buzz

Of street lamps

Outside my window


I can hear her breathing


Like the wind

Rushing through the trees

My heart beat

Pulsing in my chest

It gets harder to breathe

Take it slow

Count the seconds

My mind is so awake

But my eyelids

Are falling 
closed


And i am choking 



Inhaling

Smoke and demons

Exhaling

Carbon dioxide
And ash clouds

My hands are shaky
And my fingers

Are burning red

I feel an electric shock

Jolt through my body

Then entire numbness

sometimes, late at night
i lie awake, or sit, or even dance
i do not "sleep"
i might drowse, or snooze,
but only temporary reprive-
The Dark
holds its monsters and
pattering, clawed steps
outside of my candlelit chambers
and beyond the fragile makebelieve walls
of my lurking consciousness-
     light a candle.
     burn the Night.
     Smolder your eyes upon the smoke
banish my fears, faint light-
but do not destroy my peace-
morning Light, cast not your hands over
this black scry-stone!
Look but so gently into the Dark's swirling
and staring stars
down upon a ritual laid bare-
agate eyes upon the crown
upon the head of the young Oracle
a story for another time, a
prayer for a beating heart
in another place,
another darkened midnight womb
or perhaps an obsidian tomb--.
fill a chalice and not a mind
tip the contents to then find
a wandering flame spread to the wind
devouring those violent souls that have sinned
as such, topics change like Gaia
dear, as such my mind roams when
I cower in fear--.
in the imaginary arms of a
man I love, the one who can't be near.
Night sings a quiet song of insane
love and gentle terror, a soft-soft
sound that rings eternal
and lulls its listener not to sleep
but into a spell that gathers deep
within the core of the mind
behind the third,
before the eye,
but loud and deafening guilt
that keeps the shade-drawn witch
awake, and the quivering fear
racing in their youthful heart--.
Ladle the light of the stars above
into the cupped hands tonight
and sing the damnation back
to the groping clouds
on the black horizon, the violet and
blue and grey and white
swirling in cohesion and roaring into a wave of
conscious nightmares

i cannot deal with these thoughts
on my mind, resting upon
my heart
     my eyes
          my mind
               my very soul.