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Bobby Dodds Dec 2020
I remember the lights going off in the brains of young poets.
Deep in the dank streets of New York or Columbia college.

When the blues and twos would come and round up
The beatniks snapping to the howl of a homosexual mind.

When the generational attitudes of those too old to know,
Control the ****** acts of “violence”, or
The deepening scars of our philosophies.

When the urbanization of historical prowess leads to
Gentrified gypsies of the diamond deserts and endless skyways

When the great in the country isn’t good enough
For the red hats and spray tanned millionaires.

When the stocks of corporate dragons burn down
The attempts of upstart knights and online kingdoms.

When the politicians of old become the scapegoats
For the ironically gerontocratic few.

When the female few who dared couldn’t find their lost primaries
Or control the lifeblood leaking out of the Strait of Hormuz.  

When the powerful and powerless fought in-between
The dejected and all too often ignored.

When the powered halogen lights flooded prison yards of
Wrongly convicted and murderously in need of help.

When the San Francisco clubs lit up with muzzle flash
And the dancers lay weeping in their blood.

When the schools became places to duck and cover
Or learn to trip a friend when running from a gun.

When parkland high became a manufacturing ground
For casings, tears, and candlelight vigils.

When the American dream came combo packaged
And supersized with obesity and unemployment.

When the education of the youth became about
The profit margin in a spreadsheet full of debt.

When the sun sets in the smoke filled horizons
And sleepless rest settles on the western front.
in my life and many others, there have been almost too many tragedies, losses, disappointments and failures of the people who "Act" like they're in office to help us, and the USA. only to backstab and backdoor deal their way to more money and a worse off world.

it's not often that I attempt to fight and backhandedly throw my voice in the falling waves of media and medium, but, this I feel too strongly about, this and everything else that seems to happen in our flawed world, and seemingly hopeless breaths of 'freedom'  

As a side note/preface I recommend you learn about "Howl" and Allen Ginsburg - as well as the beatnik generation.
riri Nov 2020
You're the worst person I've ever known
I can't believe I let someone like you into my life
Months have gone by and I still resent you
I just can't get over everything you've done to me
It's hard to let go
MB Nov 2020
I don't know if I can't cry
because I don't miss you anymore
or because I'm so used to the pain
that it numbs my heart

my love for you is as leaky as a faucet,
destined to never stop-
one drop at a time
till I lose my mind
I wish I could cry- because then at least I would feel alive
Instead I am empty inside
Just Grace Sep 2020
I felt it then
like I feel it now

There was a dead end sign
at that moment I peered into our future

We tried to give space
Then that choice was taken away
One more chance to prove we can survive
locked down together

So we took my family land
We tilled that soil
Built distractions
Illusions and dreams

The peppers and tomatoes
that I now harvest
I prepare them alone
The nightshades
the itch
now taint my tears
and pink-stain my cheeks
where they have streamed
JJ Inda Sep 2020
Suddenly
you cast upon me
doubts and flaws;
not a single virtue
as resentment creeps.
Holly Aug 2020
I can still remember
the way it felt
to know the person
meant to protect you
chose not to.

I am afraid
I may never love you
the same way I used to
before I was old enough
to know what
lying really meant.

I still think of home
as a space
I was too scared
to breathe in.

sometimes
I think about
stepping out in front
of a car
and the only thing
that stops me
Is the questions
I know you would ask.

My closet
was the safest place
I felt I had left
to hide in.

It bothers me
you can’t hear
the venom
in my voice
I can’t hold back
from spitting up my throat.

I still wish
you taught me
how to love myself
Instead of
how to fear everyone else.

I still have nightmares
I am convinced I haven’t
woken up from yet.

I am a funeral
you still celebrate
every time I come home.

Some days
I hate you
for the way
you made me
love what hurt me.

There is a part of me
that still believes
I am unlovable.
setting others free by forgiving them means
setting
yourself
free

resentment is really a form of attachment.
I freely forgive everyone
in the course of a day
should a thought of a grievance
or resentment come up
I bless the offender briefly
and dismiss the thought.

the underlying cause of all my troubles has always been fear.

**** fear
**** resentment.
I need a free heart
without burden
to wander and roam the landscape
laughing
ABIL Jul 2020
Dreams

Dreams open truly devoted , never conflicted
Another addiction, but this the drugs were prescripted by Cupid
How stupid of me to fall into sleep
To dream what can be a child hood fantasy
To feel love again and not pain
Cause pain brought rain and days of sadness
And madness lying with in my shattered mind
And you couldn't see me crying ,when you said
A.B.I.L: "it's over "
Over and over ,my mind on replay
Sending you texts like please bae
It's mae
Lets put this on delay
And I don't blame you cause you needed to leave
I don't hate you cause you needed to breath
I'm just ****** that you did this to me
Set me free when you had the key
To my heart , I start again and say
I love you
And if I'm a fool so be it
I don't see a better reason
Monique Matheson Oct 2018
Today, I was going to call you
I thought about it all day
I practiced what I would say to you
"hey, hows it going?"
"hi, how are you?"
"you doing okay?"
but none of these questions were about me
I didn't rehearse lines such as
"oh yeah I went to a concert yesterday" or
"been working a lot" or
"I hate you".

Today, I was going to call you
because even though I wouldn't admit it,
I was scared of your anger for not having
jumped as your lap dog after 2 days
1 day
a few hours
I know how you feel about me
I know what you say about me
So today, I was going to call you
but no matter how many times I say
"how high?"
when you ask me to jump
you'll always tell everyone
I'm a terrible kid.

so I'm not ******* calling you today.
Mercy Jul 2020
Reminisce.
@niamornimo

I kept wondering why
In such a long time i
Held the memory in
The back of my mind

Pictures to scenes
Perfectly clear while
He took away
My innocence
Bit by bit

I told myself
Time heals but its a decade
Past but instead
Of forgetting becomes
More real
More pronounced.

As i listen to romantic()
Memories floods my mind
Like a broken dam,
Twisting my heart with pain
I guess the many similar
kinds of tenderness
Were also different kinds of sadness.

We've all been forgotten.
The pretty face outshone
The peach blossom
I don't know where the beauty went;
The peach flowers still smile
In spring breeze.
Memories
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