Quilt made of hearts
Eyes laced with static memories
You are a part of my broken record lifestyle
I can still taste you when I talk
Your energy is in a jar, sitting on my shelf getting dusty
I want to open you up, but I have nowhere left to put you

As I look into this mirror, words begin rushing through my mind.
I think to myself;
How could anyone ever love her?
How could they look at that repulsive body and be attracted to it?
For she is not beautiful.
She has asymmetrical features,
A sagging face that reveals her sadness and exhaustion,
And scars hidden by meaningless bracelets and her old red sweater.
How could someone love her, having known how she treats herself?
How could they handle the baggage she carries everywhere on her shoulder?
Her nervous habits, her inability to handle stress and her tendency to cover up her problems that show through her face with makeup are only the beginning.
How could he have loved her?
How could he have been attracted to her boney hips and large legs?
Did he know how she treated her body?
Anyone could’ve seen it.
I can't understand how he loved her crooked smile,
Her loud obnoxious laugh.,
Her obsession with horses,
Or her large hands and feet.
Did he ever really love her?
Because she doesn’t love herself, so how could anyone else?

He keeps trying to convince me that he will change
Can't teach an old dog new tricks
He keeps telling me he loves me
But how can I survive off of a what if?
We have no trust so we have nothing
I am not afraid to start over
It's been four years no ring, no commitment
And I was really stupid I have to admit
Because he was a rebound and  i let myself get serious
Now I'm much more upset because we have two kids

A 'friend' once said,
"Never take anything a guy says to heart. We lie. We break hearts. We take advantage of good people."
I didn't understand at first.
Over the next months, I realised that he had become the manifestation of his own words.

I often find myself alone
And that's when my mind starts to probe
Why no one cares
Why my heart is cold
And hard as stone
Why I become unhappier as I grow
And why my heart is
Blacker than the night and a crow

Maybe its because
I have no friends
No one who cares
Enough to stop the tears

I have spent many nights
Sad,searching for a friend
And the people I find
Always leave me uncertain
Lord,Father
Help me
Please stop the hurting
Shelter me from my enemies' eyes
Please be my curtain

Fill me with the strength
I need to keep moving on
Cause with a twisted life like mine
I have no choice but to be strong
I try to let them in
Let them break down my walls
But once I do
That's when it starts going wrong

They leave me
Continue with their lives
And don't look back
And I remain here
Thinking bout the lack of trust
That I have
All I've ever wanted was a friend
To make this sorrow end

Maybe I should stop loving
Because it never lasts
Stop building castles in the air
Cause they are not there

I cannot deny what is real
Its clear I don't appeal
And I always face this ordeal
And this weakness I conceal

My loveless heart has had enough
I don't know where to start
But let me tell you
My heart has the deepest cuts
One more heart break
Will tear it apart
I don't know why
They don't understand
That I'm a human being
Who needs love

when you have a love for a special person
but you're not allowed to see each other
what do you do?

when you have a love for a special person
who all of a sudden doesn't love you anymore
what do you say?

when you have a love for a special person
but lost track of each other and never will meet again
*how do you heal?

No joy here
Without a care, I hang my head;
Something dormed inside from chaotic dread.
No joy here.
You watch and wait, why wait for hate?
no praying is your great mistake.
No joy here.
I too watch as I turn into the person I ran from; throwing a mighty tantrum, 'The Missing Heart' anthem!
You can't stand him.
No joy here

Yeah, you clearly said it.
you typed it in our text messages,
you wrote it in letters,
you said it to my face,
you showed it with little details.
the ONLY thing you forgot to do is,
to stay in love with me.

because after the years,
that love you claimed broke.
not because of something I did,
but because you bid on our love.

yeah, you claimed to love me.
you claimed it
but it was all a joke.