As I watched my mother get beat, as a child, I was convinced that if I were to call the cops something bad would happen.
I have watched my father slam my mother in a car door.
I have watched as my father threw pans at my mother.
I have seen my mother walk out covered in bruises.
I have seen my father break a printer with my mother's head.
I remember running to my room crying and covering my head with a pillow. Hearing him curse at her calling her every bad name he could think of. My brother and I would blare the radio and still hear screams of my mother, as she was beaten.
We were young when it started out; I don't remember a period of time when it was not happening.
My mother tried to leave him time and time again. My brother and I begged of her. Just leave him, we would cry.
She was with him 18 years. She was put through Hell for 18 long years.
Peoples first assumption is why didn't she leave, why didn't she stay away. This was a question that, even to me, was hard to see; I just recently was able to understand and see what was wrong with this picture.
She was beat physically but she was abused emotionally as well. People only tend to see what they can literally see and forget what is laying behind the bruises. Day after day she was degraded, called names, told she was worthless. She began to belive it. It was now in her head that she was worthless and no one would love her. No one would put up with her, she was a *******; or so she thought.
Taking the courage to leave that is a lot, she was mentally unfit for certain jobs and her health began to decrease. She was a woman who felt that she could not succeed or provide for her children without my father, or another man.
Leaving my father for the last time was the hardest thing that I believe she had to do. She wasn't just leaving anyone. It was the father to her children, the man she has relied on for 18 years, the man that had her believing she was worthless. He done everything except brainwashing to get her to stay.
Also, my father is kind sweet and caring to everyone outside of our family. Even to our family he was nice but he had times were things of this nature, behind closed doors, would happen.
My immediate family was not the only ones who knew he beat my mom. Everyone on my fathers side of the family knew. They always made excuses or turned their heads. Some people on my moms side had questioned it but she always made excuses because she thought that she loved him.
Domestic violence is nothing to joke about. Everyone should know the signs and report anything suspicious. There are a few things to know. The person being abused has to want help to get out. The cops and social workers can not do anything unless the abused come forward when approached about it. The exception to that is when there is kids involved, like in my situation.
Domestic abuse hotlines:
1-800-799-7233 | 1-800-787-3224 (TTY)
Not sure if it's abuse?:
http://www.thehotline.org/is-this-abuse/
Domestic violence does not only harm them in the present but haunts them in the future
