Lately I’ve wondered,
about everything.
I still try to make sense,
of an unwoven string.
Why does it still hurt,
when I remember you?
When I remember us,
before it all fell through.
Is it even possible,
that you used me so long?
Or did you say that to hurt me,
and justify your wrongs.
Did it help you to think,
that I didn’t matter at all?
Did you secretly smile,
knowing that I’d fall?
I cannot believe that,
I refuse to hate you.
I refuse to give in,
and accept a false truth.
I refuse to accept,
that I didn’t know your heart,
because if I accept that,
then it will tear me apart.
We both turned into things,
we should be ashamed of,
but even till the end,
I was still in love.
Now each day is torture,
trying to lie to myself.
Now I’m the one being fake,
trying to love someone else.
Is that how it felt,
when you were with me?
If it was then I understand,
and I can finally see.
She is sweet and kind,
and loves me so much,
but I have no more to give,
because I yearn for your touch.
So I’m doing to her,
what you did to me.
I’m not being fair,
but her loves imprisoning.
Going through the motions,
now I understand,
and I forgive what you did,
when you let go of my hand.
So I’ll just keep going,
and love you from afar.
Maybe one day it can change,
and this will just be a scar.
