I've shrugged myself away since three years ago
Always wanting to change away from too much innocence
Wanting to know more about what others did
But now I've learned too much.

I want to be able to go back and cry on the sleeve of myself
And tell him to stay young forever
Tell him to not worry about the future and life
And how big your genitals are.

Tell him never to smoke or drink to death
Tell him to never yell at your angel mother
Or take for granted what keeps you warm at night
And love your friends with a peaceful mind.

Farewell, another part of the child
That once never needed an herb to have fun
He crumbles like the ash on a dusty page
Burned by the lighter of irrational maturity.

"There's a Maturity
in the cleverness
of calmness."

I remember this moment as if it were just years ago.
Felt this feeling before, guess my lifes been put on hold.
I sensed the fear in my heart.
Been too scared to rip apart.
The negativity attached to me. (Its all I know)
Its been exactly three 3 years since I've walked this path.
And now I realize there's no turning back...no turning back.
Just know that I realize
I know whats on the line.
I just gotta remember to remind myself

You just want to be dependable.
No you don't want to be dispensable.
You're much older now.
You're much wiser now.

There are certain things that I've come to understand.
The expectations I had for myself didn't go as planned.
I tried to mask all the pain.
Of my failure of a life.
Just to see that that ain't right.
But in moments like this, i ask myself.
Is this really the road you wanna go? Hell no.
But just know, that I realize now.
I know whats on the line.
I just gotta remember to remind myself.

You just want to be dependable.
No you don't want to be dispensable.
You're much older now.
You're much wiser now.
You don't want to be emotional.
No you don't want to be disposable.
You're so much older now.
You're so much wiser now.