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Lost Girl Dec 2018
Trapped inside her mind.
There are a million different doors.
All of them are locked.
None of them can fix her catastrophic thoughts.  

Only she knew the extent of her limitations.
But she didn't want to disappoint, so she kept on doing more.
All these tasks pushed her past her breaking point.

Little did she know,
Kindness was the poison rooted deep inside in her mind.

All alone.
There she goes.
Watch her soul float away.
Now she no longer feels any pain.
Lost Girl Nov 2018
Euphoria, euphoria, euphoria
This energy is glowing inside of me
My mind won’t stop spinning
Is this insanity?
jlf Oct 2018
for all the turbulence i sought
and sought
i was pretty good
i was so good

i battled through all the chaos
my kite was finally flying

but i snorted so much ritalin
my pupils are tar pits
and she calls me a hedonist but
i don't know what that means

i do know that
i fear neither death
nor consequence
you can treat me like your last meal
always at my most decadent

i remember i need to eat
then delete the thought
the only thing that sustains me is the rushing

by now
you should know that

it's all about me
we did the maths remember?
hypomania is like having low grade superpowers that you can't co-ordinate to do anything other than self destruct
Jewel M C Nov 2018
send me a lifeline
the world is on fire
i need to go back in time
please believe me, this is dire
let me erase the chaos
& return to a world
where everything is fine
& things aren't in constant decline
why do things keep falling apart
it can't be good for the heart
i wish i could press restart
i'd give anything
for a chance
to reset this life
B E Cults Nov 2018
have you ever noticed anything that sent you spinning
off into the empty infinity of blossoming cognizance?

pupils dilate,
sweat beads,
words collapse back into what they imply; we only know
because we watched the footage.

yes, we watched it together
and yes, it is the only father figure that pays for her own dinner these days.

i wish i was worth forgetting in the future.

i wish people didnt feel they had to be anything but here.

i wish people would teach their children about how i could market loose teeth to coastlines.

im laughing at your puzzled aura
from the next epochal shift.

(man enters and exits stage right, nervously)

it's deep is a depth but really nonsense.
say hello to poetry. she made me write this.
Marley Gold Nov 2018
On a chair
On a cliff
My back is straight
My arms are stiff
It churns
On angular
Axis
Gracious
Then Gaunt
Back and
Forth
Momentum
Momentous
Backwards?
Nothing
Just the chair
Rocking
Tipping
Anxiety
Anticipating
I flail before
Straightening
Caught once
Again
Always always
Hesitating
Again
I am coughing
Again
I am drowning
See me smiling?
It’s quiet
Screams sent
Screeches screamed
But only when
Slumbering
Silence kept
Returning
Is the Sanatorium moving?
Except the grime
My lungs secreting
Drowning
My coughs in my arm
There is no sign
There is no alarm
Just is
Is
Is
Rocking
Back
And forth
Coughing, stumbling
And finally finally
Falling

I flail before
Straightening
I'm going to be honest the chair on the cliff idea was from someone in 7th grade but ever since I've found it so profound a metaphor
Marley Gold Nov 2018
Women throw themselves in front of it
With actual freedom
Faces are drawn out in wild arrays by it
Alive finally in abandon

Screeches shrill sounding
Significant in their speech
Shrill speech they screech
Not ever silencing
Loud
Not tempered but proud

It’s echoes
Of crackles
Echoing
Cackles
It’s complimenting
The women naked and needing
Complimenting

Feel feel. Feel
Warmed for the first
With their own voice
With their own feet on the earth
With themselves

With who?
With whom.

Autumn comes cold
Campfire feathered fathers
“You’re just young and becoming old”

With who?
With whom
Cut off at curfew

Passive apathy persuades
To find warmth away; Away.
Alone again I find myself today
Strong specter in silence
Soft snowflakes
Missing when day breaks
Sleeping songs
Slip into my headphones
Shutter slipping
Sound skipping
Everyday
Monotony
Every movement
Is extraordinary

Cold cuts crisp
like
Cracked lips
With who?
With whom
Cut off at curfew

Now nowadays new
Without you
I have myself to
Have myself too
Cut me off at curfew
With who?
With whom
Hi I've read Sylvia Plath before
em Oct 2018
the only sound i remember is my feet colliding with the pavement.

over and over and over again.



when its over, theres a police officer in my home.

he looks unusual standing in my living room.

i let him handcuff me while my father, a retired officer himself, looks away in disgust.

when he takes me outside to his police car, my neighbor is outside.

she makes eye contact with me and quickly looks away.


this is my life.

it’s euphoric, its dreary, its beautiful and miserable all at once.

it’s sleeping on hard mattresses reading words engraved in psych ward walls.

it’s the low glow of motel lights and it’s kissing the lips of my best friend who i’m so desperately in love with. it’s spilling our hearts out on her bed and wishing we were older.

where do i go from here?
Tina RSH Oct 2018
I wish for the monster to be hidden
forever, lest anybody else be bitten
as I am, but that is no matter, la!
my blood succumbs to its venom
my ruptured veins and invaded serum
His black hand draws a smile on my lips
It takes a second or less until it flips
into a torrent in my eyes to wash away
every happy feeling I had during the day
But what if someone counted every scar
sustained and found this little girl bizzare?
Let the sleeping monster lie and never speak
outside this verse, lest they call you a freak.
On bipolar disorder and how it's affecting my life these days.
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