i met you,
and you had me wondering since then.
how it took me years to find hope
only to realize that it can be seen
in the eyes of someone i love.
how, maybe, i could use a little sunshine
instead of sulking in my little dark room.
how you are that little sunshine.

how i can write silly, sappy poems
when i thought every letter my hand scribbles
only ends up in a goodbye.
how it took me years to know
there is someone like you out there
who could give hugs
i never knew i needed.
how it is unfair
that i could be having the worst day
but still feel light and calm
when i'm with you.

i met you,
and sometimes i wish i never had to.
because then i wouldn't have to
replay our conversations in my head
while smiling out of the blue.
then i wouldn't have to
stay up 'til dawn
thinking how someone can be so beautiful
wondering why
it has to be you that i want
when it could literally be anyone else.

i wouldn't be
missing you as soon as you leave
or wanting to hear
what is now a familiar sound of laughter
or wanting to see
what is now a familiar half-laugh and half-smile
i could never get enough of,
when years ago i didn't have
even the faintest idea
of your name
or how your touch feels.

i guess if i never met you,
i wouldn't be used to
knowing
and wondering
and thinking
and writing
about you and your lovely soul.

i guess it would be easier
to not be aware
that i could feel some love
when i thought
all my heart could do
is to feel hatred and anger and guilt.

and if i never met you,
i wouldn't have to know
how it feels to be
a little too happy
even when my life is falling apart.

but i guess if i could go back
to the day i met you,
i would be there,
at the same place and time,
and i can only wish
you'd choose to be there, too.

Dear mom,

You’re not perfect
I know you never will be
Maybe I hold you too high a standard
That your legs and arms can’t reach
Maybe I hold grudges I shouldn’t
And I know that makes you feel upset
I have a hard time forgetting
But I do forgive
I’m not perfect
And you know I never will be

You’re my mom
Sometimes I act like you’re not
I’m guilty of spilling words of regret
I’m guilty just as you are of mistakes
I’m your son
Sometimes you acted like I’m not
You’re guilty of intolerance
You’re guilty just as I am of mistakes

Words have escaped our lips
We both know shouldn’t have been said
They lay in the past
With pain and regret
They’ve sprouted into something better
A feeling and movement of love
To conquer those bad vibrancies

It doesn’t take 24 hours to restore a wound
Yet I see your love through your actions
Wrapping itself on my scars
Eagerly wanting them to heal
And I hope as time passes you see me Walk through the pathway you’ve started to build


Often, we take one step forward and Two steps back
But we are always improving from the person we were yesterday
Hence progress that wasn’t always there
And I’m appreciative of the energy you set forth into me

Thank you.

like the heads coming out of the cinema screens at night, tired.
a trail of tiredness accompanied with them  
like smoke ends following their coats.

I am high on life,
drowning in euphoria,
and drunk on loving.

Love is
neither eternal nor existential

its just like a spark from a flint in a flourished forest.

When the spark vanishes the forest burns.