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girl 1d
It's always you against the world but it's
Okay to remain silent
To sail through your endless thoughts
Be in your world,
Alone wandering like a traveller of the night

It's okay to be alone.
emma 1d
if only
he would let me go
my heart is a mouse
but his grasp is a cage
with each weakening breath
i continue to fade
further and further
until i am but a speck
caught under his fingernail

so for now
i scrape the black out from under my eyes
and rub my skin raw in the kitchen sink

i would have left if i could
but it wasnt easy to root out the thorns he planted in me
n oa 1d
the sunburnt skin on my chest is peeling
the same skin that your fingertips grazed over
softly at 2 am's and 10 am's
i'm renewing
but i don't want to
i miss you
         i wish i wore sunscreen
My scars say
The thousands of words
That never left my mouth
Perri 1d
I miss being cold from my head to my soul;
I want to be ****** back in to the dark hole
I found comfort in for years.
I long for the feeling of lack of touch; hungry for the deprevation of human contact.
So please listen when
I wish to be ignored,
I pray to be unloved
and I beg to be forgotten.
Because that's where I feel
most at home.
skyler 1d
an amber bottle full of dark secrets and broken promises
we press our chapped lips against the rim
the burn of the *** is the only fire left in my stomach
the shake of your hands is what i  feel in my bones
mommy taught me how to make a cocktail
before she taught me how to love myself
and long story short  i can make mixed drinks in my sleep
but self care is blacking out in the backyards of strangers

s.s
Time slips backward over little slivers
Of love and broken lives,
Gathering them up, using the soft mess
Of once-blessed feeling mixed with
Grand passion,
Until it knits together the pieces of
Hate and love like a potion:
Unseemly, neither black nor white...
And we refuse to see it.

Time rolls forward as we ignore it,
Over hurt as well as joy,
For we have taught ourselves to lie,
To say that nothing matters in
The “grand scheme of things”...
And so our life passes us by.

Until, one day, we discover
We are alone even as we stand
Beside those we love.
And we know them not.
Where love resides,
There loathing and resentment
Peek from amidst the ruinous
Muddle, which we created,
Simply unaware.

We two may stare into each others’ eyes,
As if two strangers,
Wary of false hopes and lies.
Stale passion bonded to forgotten vows
Leave us helpless, caught in a patterned
Web of half-truths and hidden threat.

Soon we are reduced to stiff civility,
“Sly apologies and polite regrets”.
Love dies more slowly than the ability
To end the dance or forget.
We settle in, like corpses in a crypt,
To the slow departure of ourselves.

As the mind rises up above the scene,
We take it in, gawkers on a highway,
Aghast yet unable to refrain
From still more self-flagellation.
Another empty day drags by
And in our lonely, separate prisons…we stay.


Rediscovered on January 20, 2019
Thankfully, I'm in a much better place than this...at least for the present, which is all anyone can really say...
Fayre 2d
The inevitable change of
circumstances leaves me
weakened -

I have become undone.
Sometimes I feel like I'm whirling down my own rabbit hole.
The humming rush of water
Is hypnotizing me
The songs of lonely birds
All perched on separate trees

The soft rattling
The brush of vibrant leaves
All pull a string that's deeply
Planted in the roots of me

Chiming along
I am a lonely bird
Perched upon a tree
Where no one sees

Crying out
I sing with the clouds
Wings lifted
Ready to flee

Tentatively brush dark leaves
With muster I push on to see
Where this overgrown path
will lead

Lungs filled
Intoxicated
On the fresh
Breeze.

So drawn I push forward
What do I see
But a small part
Of what appears to be me

I step forward
One more time
I am longing
To see

Where this
Path
Will
Lead

Do I continue
Will I succeed
Do I push forward
Do I proceed

Am I lost inside
This lonely forest
Do I hide
Where no one sees

Do I wait alone
Where the silence lulls me
to hypnotic tones

Of lonely birds shown
perched upon a tree
Sarah 2d
I’m so tired
Tired of trying
Tired of falling
Tired of never getting back up again

Everyone I see
Is only a better version of me
Prettier
Softer
Marketable

So I spend another night restless
Tearful and alone
Only to wake up once again
To realize how much I hate myself again

Some days I just can’t help but think
If I’m so easily replacable
Why the **** would anyone ever miss me?
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