My days are busy with pretending
To be normal,
But my evenings, my love,
They're filled with either liquor
Or wanting you
So much,
So much...


-- Eleanor

this is the black that I cloaked myself in,
my father's inheritance,
cold blanket of blindness.
that is the crescent slipper I wore
on my feet.
I was Hermes,
coal, jet, fresh leather,
I was a ****** of crows:
a carrion cluster feasting on white
dwarfs and other dead things
that hang by this stellar roadside.
I was alone
and I thought it was magic.
I was alone
and I prayed for magic.
when I sealed that spell
the words made me jump,
I wasn't expecting
to see you here.

I spend my days in money
My days off are in honey
I like it that way.

I like my tequila neat
And my baby sweet

But tonight,
Tonight

It wasn't neat,
It wasn't sweet

It was *****.

Halloween will soon begain
People will be wearing fake masks with grins
But I'll be walking around in my own skin
For I know what resides within

When the Halloween weekend finally resounds
I'll let him out to roam around
To scare everyone in this town
Even the corpses under ground

My beast doesn't need the moon to come out
A little liquor lets him walk about
Just so you have no doubt
He feeds off every scream, every shout

He'll make the children never sleep
Make grown men cry and weep
He will sow and he will reap
After all to him your sheep

Saturday night
My monster came out to fight
I'm sorry it gave you such a fright

But when the liquor flows in
My monster tells all my sins
Please let me have a do over once again

I'll keep my closest locked up tight
I won't subject you again to that sight
I know it wasn't right

I know we are a casual thing
My pain I didn't need to bring
You didn't need to see my clipped wings

I'll take passion over emptiness
I'm just looking for a glimpse of happiness
So from you I'll hide all my craziness
I'll just be your temptress
A casual thing, that still lives in the darkness

The liquor has taken over
I don't ever want to be sober
The view from this side is not the same
On this side everything looks sane
It takes a twisted view, to accepte this life
To have the strength to endure the strife
Just leave me on the steps of intoxication
It's the only way I can deal with my situation

"Darling, darling, doesn't have a problem
Lying to herself 'cause her liquor's top shelf
It's alarming honestly how charming she can be"-Lana Del Rey [Carmen]

Her hand on the Jack Daniels to escape the memories.

Undecipherable is her emotions

She looks you in the eyes, showing that she's not afraid

Not afraid, of the thoughts that haunt

the life she has to live

the expectations she has to fulfill

the beauty she has to uphold

but her melanin's juxtapose

They talk and talk

Her slurs on a thousand

She's charming and cute

you're in for a hoot

the Jack Daniels takes her into an abyss and brings her back like the touch of her spouse and ****** of their  encounters: on the island, couch, in the bedroom.

Fading .. Relapsing in time. —Bejoux Soleil
  #BSoleil

beneath tonight's magnificent
obsidian veil
i can finally see beyond all this constant cognitive dissonance
the way the sky bends around me
and only me
it's endlessness merges with time and emptiness like an inebriated driver changing lanes without looking

smooth as ****
but only to the one behind the wheel

and since there were no injuries
we'll say they flow together beautifully like you and i once did
only there were injuries
and we are not beautiful

not anymore

underneath the darkest, most far away place, and as strange as this will sound, i've never felt such comfort
i've finally found comfort

The cold bites bitterly at my face
Figures, the night I decide to go for a walk
This unseasonably warm winter turns to mace
Liquor warms but ultimately steals

The breath turns to ice on my face
The ice has a way of boiling my emotions
Bringing them to the surface
Until they're all out of space

The liquor causes flushing
Not only in the cheeks
But in the skin and in the the weeks
My skin tells more than I ever could

Time tries but can't tell all
Just like my cheeks the story comes from nothing
But it blossoms nicely
Into a beautiful rendition of the emotions within