Our relationship was confusing
We act like couples
But we are just friends
I was tired of thinking
Thinking of us
Of what we are

So I asked you a question
A question that will determine our future
But you were too scared of me
Afraid that you are not able to handle my mental state
So you said we were better of as friends
And I can never be friends with you
Not with someone I love so much
So I decided to leave
To end us
Our friendship
To no longer talk to you anymore
It was at 9.45pm
When I sent you the goodbye text
You didn't reply to me
You just left be on seen

It's the next day
And it's 9.45pm
A full day without you
Is a sad day alone
And I'm sure
I will have to go through this everyday
Until I'm able to let you go

I'll remember
9.45,
Is the time I said goodbye

People will reach out to you,
for they want to earn your trust.
But there's something inside you,
telling you...

"Are you gonna trust that person?...
Sooner or later, you'll end up disappointed again,
so it's better to shut the door and lock it...
Don't let anyone in."

For your heart was far too damage,
it can be fixed...But not the way it used to be.

It's finally hitting me.
I told myself it was all lies
But now I know
I might never see you again
My heart is
S.  H.   A.  T.   T.  E.   R.  E.  D
Into a million pieces
Almost as many as
the memories we shared
I don't want it to end.

You planted the seeds
                                              Calling roots
To grow a garden
                                         To give life
Between
                                    Shadow to tree.
               Nothing grows
               Free without love
               For without love,
               Freedom is untrue
               Like love who lied
               Stole your freedom
               From you.

I like you on the brink of love,
am afraid I will fall.
and with a broken heart,
for you make me feel whole...
with nonchalance of a sigh,
I like you...
yet I don't even know why.
I just like you.

When all becomes heavy, and you’ve made yourself so small that your pleas are like the voice of a mouse, remember: The sword must go through the heart, and you are to relish in this sweet ache, forever and ever, and that is a kind of survival. And when all is still heavy, and your pain is not the kind that will set you free, do not shun the hand of your loved one. For there is a kind of heart that can only be held with two hands. Both of them cannot be your own.

Is it too much?
Am i too little?
is it too much to wish for a person who loves you?
maybe I am not made for love, maybe I am too complicated, maybe I make problems just in my head and bring them on stage to destroy the act of u and me?
maybe
I am not the problem
maybe it is u, or him, or my ex-best friend
but what would it change?
to find somebody who is the bad guy who took every smile out of the others face?
cause it would just be too much.
And i don't know how much more i can take
cause I am too little
And my feelings are way too big