My mascara running down my cheek,
I am always so tired and I feel weak.
The lump in my throat makes it too hard to eat.
I´m so numb, will my life be complete?

My poor tear stained pillow
it probably wants a break from my low.
My heart wrenching to not be a burden
to those who ¨love¨ me, I cant be certain.

I cant walk but only crawl.
I can barley be who you want me to be at all.
You basically call me a freak while
my mascara runs down my cheek.

"you'll never know what it's like to be a mother"
"Oh I didn't know you raised your brothers"
"Hmm, as well as your cousins?"
I was in California youth connections fighting for fosters by the dozens
I was the child left behind
But I was never blind
I knew my bind
My grind wouldn't stop
Making sure no child was left at the bottom
Made sure they could always shoot there shot
I knew just because I didn't get it
Doesn't mean I didn't want them to win it
Raise up the next generation so they can do better
Cross your t's and dot your I's
Make sure they can read every letter
Because it's not about how good or bad you did
It's about making sure they get through the stormy weather
So give them a jacket, some gloves and a hug
Because you can give them the world
But what a child needs most
Is love

NOT EVERYONE*


Everyone can stay not in your life, most especially fake people would find every reason to let go. While the real will seek all chances to stay go.
No friends, cherish the family.
#c9_fm

I fear many things.
Fear that one day, my loved one die.
Fear that one day, I leave them behind.
Fear that they one day leave.
When lonely, I fear none.
Karma long severe, I put no heed to life.
Walking in life once again,
they came back to me.
Once in my hand,
I fear that I will lose it.

She would hold my hand

and look at me.

Pearls in her eyes,

like mine.

I don't have her eyes,

hers are blue,

mine are green,

but I could see myself in hers,

a faint mirror image

like looking into a lake.

Pearls on her cheeks,

whiter than mine.

I have young cheeks,

still burning red,

reacting like a traffic light,

to everything new and exciting.

She said that changes,

when you're older.

We sat there,

mine hand in hers.

I don't have hands like that,

hers are long like pianists,

wrinkled and full of character,

interesting hands.

Mine are young and smooth,

like a dolls hands.

So small they disappeared,

when we held hands.

And so freezing cold,

I would take her hands,

just to steal a little warmth.

I bought flowers today,
tulips in a vase,

petals are dropping,
while I'm looking,
yellowed photographs,
memories of a flower

Tulips are growing,
standing in a field,
smiling in yellow,
early spring bloom

cut umbical cords,
leaving mother nature
tied together family,
a bouquet of love

Tulips are dancing,
dangling in small hands,
A little girl is running,
to surprise her mother

A daughters flowers,
a gift for mothers

Some mothers like tulips,
feet in the earth,
icy stones with labels,
daughter, wife and mother

Lay them down,
pretty little things,
decorate the ugly,
with little girl prayers

You know, I love you to the farthest
Galaxy in our wide universe
And no scientist knows how far that is
No matter the distance they traverse.

I will love you til the sun turns white
And the stars begin to fade.
And when that time finally reached us
I'll even love you for a few more decades.