I don't know what wrong have I done
To deserve so much pain
Always, have I been kind
Yet, have I lost a few friends
Suffered, have I, a rather painful divorce
My marriage was a total farce
However, not at all was I at fault
Never, did I deserve so much hurt!

I don't know what wrong have I done
To be taken for granted by a woman
Whom I loved a lot
She cared for me not one bit
Though she turned out to be an amazing actress
Who pretended to be in great distress
And milked me for all was I worth
Really, was she the worst!!

I don't know what wrong have I done
To be so rudely cut off by a woman
Who always called me her best friend
Never did I think our long relationship would end
In such a brutal manner
Especially considering was I always good to her
How dare she take advantage of my autism
***** her and her Brahminical egoism!!

I don't know what wrong have I done
To be rejected by almost everyone
On a variety of dating apps
Sometimes I feel I am being treated like a corpse
What qualities do I lack?
Why do some people only look at my mistakes
And not the good things have I done?
Seriously, with India, am I done!!

I don't know what wrong have I done
But I am not going to be taken for granted again
***** all of you, thanks to whom I have suffered
There may be a time when YOU suffer
I will laugh at you then
Truly, never again, am I going to be taken for a ride
Because Jesus is on my side
Amen!!

I thought you cared for me
Because, your words had always conveyed that to me
I was supposed to be your best friend
However, our relationship, you decided to end
You said you were my sister
But you left me feeling rather bitter
Because you cared only about yourself
And left me hating myself
For something as minor as a Facebook comment
Never did you have any good intent!

I thought you cared for me
But it was never "we"
It was all "you"
Our friendship had no value
Because you were obsessed about yourself
You and your anaconda sized ego
Which you could never let go
You and your precious Mumbai Indians
Were the only **** sapiens
Who truly mattered to you
Apart from your "bestest friend"
You, would he blindly defend
As though you were a Nobel Prize winner
While you were actually a sore loser
With an extremely domineering personality
Masked by a deceptively sweet tongue

I thought you cared for me
But you never let me be
Because, all that mattered, was your precious image
Often, would you take umbrage
Over relatively insignificant matters
Such as me not marking you present
When you were LITERALLY absent
No wonder, did you have your haters
Because, YOU came before everyone else
Never did you take a pause
And empathise with anyone
In fact, YOU were everyone!!

I thought you cared for me
But you never truly cared for anyone
You thought you were a special someone
Who deserved all the attention in the world
On the other hand, often did you fold
At the slightest hint of pressure
Though you were so sure
That you were always right
Oh boy, never were you a pretty sight!!

I thought you cared for me
But you never took the trouble to understand me
You called me your best friend
But I was nothing more than a means to an end
Because you were a narcissist
And as a friend, one of the worst
Seriously, accepting your offer of friendship
Was nothing short of a mishap!!
Anyway, you will get what's coming to you
Your friends will eventually leave you
And then it will be just YOU
Left to fend for yourself
As you deserve to be
Because you are so obsessed with yourself
However, the world is for all
It's time you learned that
Once and for all!!

At a time when I was held prisoner
By my shy nature
Especially when it comest to talking with girls
You put your best foot forward
In order to break the ice
Which was doing its best
To try and freeze me to death
As though I were but in Antarctica
So, I thought you my friend
Mind you, an assumption it wasn't
You called me your best friend
Not once or twice
But many a time
You even called yourself my sister
A trusting person that I am
I took you at face value
Which was probably one of the biggest mistakes
Of my life in entirety
If Australia dominated cricket
You were my dominator
Your name stands for desire
And all you desired
Was getting your way
When it comest to anything and everything
You were such a drama queen
You put the Kardashians to shame
Only your "bestest friend" escaped
From your terrifying glare
Which burnest everything in its path
Much like Lord Shiva's third eye
You were always right
We were always wrong
Again, with a notable exception
Your precious little "bestest friend"
What he saw in you
Only God knowest
Marking you absent in the attendance register
Which was but my duty
Turned out to be a crime
Fouler than ****** itself!!
How dare I mark the "Queen" absent
Even if she were indeed absent!!
How dare I support Chennai Superkings
Even if I were but from Chennai
Not to mention, a huge fan of MS Dhoni!!
East or West, North, South Or Central
Mumbai Indians were always the best
All other teams were trash
You and your whims and fancies
Driveth all of us mad
Quicker than a tracer bullet
As Ravi Shastri would say
Even to this day
But you were my best friend
Not to mention, my sister!!
So mum I kept
As would a fiercely loyal dog
Even when ignored by its master
After our college days endeth
I stayed in touch
As would every friend in the world
In particular, a best friend
But best friend you were certainly not
I can forgive even an enemy
But not a friend who cuts me off
For the flimsiest reason in the world
To you, I was wrong
Though reality speaketh otherwise
But hey, why would I want to lose my best friend?
So did I apologise
Not once or twice
But many a time
Though for the kind of response I receiveth
Might I have spoken to the wall instead!!
After ages and ages
Cometh your response
As arrogant as James Potter in his school days
You showeth me your true face
Nothing but a jumped up rich Punjabi Brahmin
Who thinkest she were the best
In not just India
But the world in its entirety
Gone was your sweet tongue
In full display was a mini Bellatrix Lestrange
Ready to **** even her best friend
As the real Bellatrix did
With her cousin Sirius Black
Well, I would rather I died
Than maintain a friendship
With a cunning ***** like yourself
You deserve not
A single true friend in the world
Not even your "bestest friend"
You smashed my self-confidence
Into a billion little pieces
Pieces that I continue to pick up
Even to this day
Something I could but have avoided
Had I not taken you up
On your offer of friendship
Which was but as fake
As the smile of a Kardashian
I endeth on this note
It is but a lesson to all
Not to get swayed by sweet tongues
Scratch beneath the surface
Then only showeth up the true character

What did I lack, as a friend?
I always helped you
Even when I was busy
I provided you moral support
I stood up for you
When you were made fun of
I took time out for you
As and when I could
I even invited you over to my home
Along with my other friends
And my mother and grandmother took great trouble
To ensure that you all had a delicious lunch
They treated you like a family member
And after college, I continued to keep in touch
As much as I could
Though I made new friends, during my MBA
I never ever forgot you
Also, in case you forgot
It was you
Who wanted to be friends with me in the first place
At a time when I was too shy
To initiate conversations with girls
You broke me out of my shell
So, I thought it was obvious
That you cared for me
How wrong I was
You just saw me as a project
Which eventually got completed
After we left college
I was nothing more to you
Than a tool, to be used and thrown
I was never truly a friend to you
Though you called me your best friend
And that too multiple times
You took offense over a harmless comment
And cut me off from your life
It never occurred to you
That I could be very sensitive
And therefore such an incident could impact me adversely
Including destroying my self-esteem
And creating trust issues
Anyway, you may be flying high at the moment
But keep in mind
That, as the ancient cliche goes
"What goes around comes around"
I have nothing more to say
Except that you can try to be a better human being
And think about other people as well
After all, the world doesn't revolve around you alone

To quote Athos from "The Three Musketeers"
"You are not a woman
You are a demon escaped from Hell"
When I first met you as a colleague
I made the mistake
Of getting friendly with you
When I should have ensured
That our relationship was going to be strictly professional
Of course, you had your own ways
Of charming those whom you came in contact with
That is something for which I have to give you credit
Albeit grudgingly
And you were an expert
At playing the victim card
Nevertheless, after I changed jobs
I thought I had seen the last of you
However, you came back into my life
As unexpectedly as the recent rains in Chennai
Initially, it seemed kind of sweet
However, I should have realised sooner
That you had certain ulterior motives
Unfortunately, I got fooled by your sweet talk
And started helping you financially
Because you looked up to me as a brother
I never doubted you in the slightest
Which was probably the biggest mistake of my life
You took advantage of me
In the worst way possible
And kept draining my bank account
Your lies kept getting taller and taller
And I kept believing them
Because, you had me well and truly under your thumb
However, even the most credulous person in the world
Can develop suspicions at some stage
Thus, after years of being in a psychological coma
I finally managed to wake up to the harsh reality
And told my family everything
Of course, with the help of a dear family friend
After we finally confronted you
You signed a written agreement
Promising to return all my money
Within a certain deadline
That deadline has long since passed
And you have not paid even ten percent of your dues
What is worse
Is the fact that you are absconding
And giving absolutely nonsensical reasons
Which even an utter fool would find it difficult to believe
You ruined my life
Destroyed my happiness
And shattered my self-confidence
Is this the way you treat a person
Whom you have addressed as "brother"
Not once, not twice, but several times?
I am giving you one last chance
Not for your sake
But for the sake of humanity
You had better take it
Because, if not
Then you will soon find yourself in prison
Again, to quote Athos
"You are not a woman
You are a demon escaped from Hell"

I had really hoped
To forget you, once and for all
However, it seems you are always hovering around
Like an annoying little mosquito
Ready to **** the blood
Of anyone and everyone in your vicinity
And looking for that perfect window of opportunity
To mock my shortcomings
Which apparently do not exist
For your precious little "best friend"
Who has a smug smile on his face
Ready to defend you at the drop of a hat
Of course, it will only be a matter of time
Before you tire of him as well
Because, people exist merely for your needs
Which are about as realistic
As Telugu action movies are
Therefore, it is a huge irony
That you were my first female friend
Of course, I am not sure you understand
What friendship truly means
Because, you promise one thing
And then proceed to do the exact opposite
May God help that unfortunate soul
Who truly cares for you
Because s/he will be in for a rollercoaster ride
Which will never end
Until your delusional fantasies are satisfied
By the time that eventually happens
S/he would be dead
Anyway, it was you
Who wanted to be friends with me in the first place
I, being a naive idiot
Readily accepted your offer of friendship
And was with you
Through thick and thin
However, you cut me off
When you needed me no longer
I apologised to you a number of times
Not because I did anything wrong
But because your inflated ego required a massage
Alas! To you, I was nothing more than a problem child
Whom you wanted to mould
According to your whims and fancies
I was never an independent human being
Who could make his own choices
And live his life on his own terms
Your own Brahmin sensibilities matter more to you
Than a friend who genuinely cared for you
Unlike "Mr Smug Face", whom I had mentioned earlier
You destroyed my self-confidence
And turned me into an insecure wreck
God knows how many more people exist
Whom you've treated as "use and throw"
Just keep one thing in mind, though
There will surely be a time
When the tables are turned
And it is you who will become a lonely wreck
Then there will be noone
Who is ready to rush to your aid
Because, you will be forgotten; once and for all
As you deserve to be

You wanted me to be your brother
To be a part of your extended family
I believed you
Since you seemed sincere enough
And got along well with most people
Thanks to your lively nature
And the dedication you seemed to show
As far as your work was concerned
I was in awe
Of the way you managed your life
Juggling work and studies every single day
And yet managing to keep a smile on your face
I should have got an inkling
That there was something amiss
However, thanks to my ignorance
Induced by my autism
And because you played your part so well
I never got to see your true colours
Until it was almost too late

You wanted me to be your brother
And I was indeed a good brother
I was always there for you
But never did I imagine
That you would take advantage of me
In such a callous and audacious manner
When you had that rather painful shoe bite
I took care of you
Even though my other colleagues advised me against it
But you were never truly grateful
In fact, you kept your distance
And came up with a silly sob story
To prevent me from interacting with you at office
I should have realised by then
What kind of a person you really were
Then again, I was woefully naive
And only wanted you to be happy
Even if it killed me from inside

You wanted me to be your brother
Well, I did my part
But you never did yours
When I first started helping you financially
I was doing it because I truly cared about you
And had a strong belief
That you would repay your dues eventually
Once again, like always
I was horribly wrong
You came up with story after story
And I kept believing you
Thanks to my incredibly credulous nature
And thus ended up draining my own bank balance

You wanted me to be your brother
Except that, instead of being your brother
I ended up being your sugar daddy
But then, like my mother said later
I was in a trance
And thus became your ATM
I have to admit, though
That you were a really good actress
Modulating your voice
To a mere shadow of what it usually would be
In order to induce me to believe
That you were suffering from blood infection
Just one out of hundreds of lies
That came out of your pathetic mouth

You wanted me to be your brother
Except that a true sister does not lie or cheat
That too, not once
Not twice
Not even thrice
But a thousand times
You have absolutely no idea
How you've ruined my life
And brought distress to my family
As well as a very close friend of mine
Through your utterly despicable actions

You wanted me to be your brother
And it was the biggest mistake of my life
To take you seriously
You even had the nerve
To make me travel for 16 km
In the hot sun
Right in the middle of summer
In order to meet you
Just so that I could keep trusting you
Or rather, keep getting fooled by your lies and half-truths

You wanted me to be your brother
But you lied to me all the time
And cheated me of my entire savings
After all that you've done
You still have the nerve
To beg for my sympathy
You are a disgrace to women
In fact, a disgrace to the entire human race
Even ISIS is far more worth sympathising with
Than you will ever be!!
Well, I would have ideally wanted you to suffer
In the most painful manner possible
But I need you to return all that you took
I don't care how you do it
Do it, and we can go our own separate ways
I can forget that you exist, and vice-versa
But until you do it
I will always be your biggest nightmare
In this entire planet
When I am good, I am very good
But when I am bad, I am the worst
So, you had better watch out
My so-called sister

I thought you considered me a friend
You were always nice to me
But I am afraid
That I thought wrong
Well, being wrong has become as common
As India failing to win a global cricket tournament
Especially as far as people are concerned
Thanks to my autism
Though I was not aware of it
When I was in college with you all
I was always seen as different
Well, it is true that I am different
But I was never one of you
I was a lone wolf
Left to fend for myself
At the slightest hint of trouble
You never took me seriously
I was always the problem child
Who just needed to "grow up"
And then everything would be taken care of
It also didn't help
That I was a South Indian
Though my Hindi was decent
You always saw me as a "Madrasi"
But I saw you all as human beings
Not fair-skinned North Indians
Anyway, you must understand one thing
Friendship is not a joke
It is a serious relationship
If you can't be friends after college
Then you can never be friends at all
Don't call me a friend
And then take me for granted
Leaving me to drown
In a pool of my deepest insecurities
Which, by the way
Would never have been created in the first place
Had you possessed the guts
To be honest with me
Right from the start
Instead of playing your precious games
Just call me an acquaintance
And be done with it
Full stop