Don’t disappear
From my sight,
From my mind.
I feel your pulse weakening.
You’re fading away.

You cross these rivers of thought with me,
But do you know where I intend to go?
Do you give care for things like this?
Do you give grace now?
I feel you fading away.

Take the long walk home.
Tell me all the things you know,
All the things, your eyes have seen
All the things your tongue tasted
I want to know all that makes your heart storm
All that makes you dawn like the sun on a bright day.
You’re fading away.

I cannot find in me to make you stay,
Words won’t stick,
hands won’t fight,
legs won’t run,
I am here.
Don’t disappear from my sight,
from my mind.
I feel your pulse weakening
I feel the life in you escaping,
With it all our past and what-ifs.
You’re fading away,
but don’t disappear.

She lost her mind caught in a web of lies laced with deceit
Tangled in knots made of suicidal thoughts left on the concrete

She lost her heart in the aftermath of an unrequited love
With more passion and pain than she could ever have dreamed of

She lost her soul to a man she didn't know and can never get it back
Crying inside and constantly on the verge of an anxiety attack

She lost her faith in life with so little to show for all that she'd done
Burning all the bridges she'd carefully built, fading away from everyone

Sometimes I think I have a black abyss in my brain that memories fall through and rarely come back from.

One day I woke up with the feeling of excitement because,  although I couldn't  remember, something was going to happen that day. Something that I fell asleep thinking about the night before with anticipation. I went through the whole day ardently thinking about what it was but for the  life of me, I couldn't remember.

And then I realized it was ice cream.
I had bought a pint of Forbidden Chocolate ice cream the night before and I had stopped myself from eating the whole thing at 2 in the morning. I had told myself I would eat it for breakfast the next morning.

It was ice cream. Friendly's  Forbidden Chocolate ice cream to be exact. That was what kept me itching my brain all day fervently to remember. I almost wished  I hadn't remembered. I almost wished I could pretend it was something bigger, something better that I could look forward to for the rest of my day. Something I could look forward to for perhaps even the rest of my life.

Ice cream. It was just ice cream.

I could no longer make a poem
For my mind has gone silent
Tried to swallow, choked on words
How pitifully malevolent.

I see my reflection in the mirror
But that wasn't really me
I see pain behind the smile
But the eyes were filled with glee.

Red was the color–
Of the stain on her cheeks
Blue was once the sky
But now it all can't be fixed.

I could not understand
How quick it was to change
But it wasn't entirely true...
Still see me within your range?

I may be what I appear to be
But deep within, I'm scared
Please hold me, don't let go
For all the memories that we shared

I can't assure that I could stay
But I'll still be right here
This love could only grow
Even if I disappear.

Thank you, I'm sorry
This won't be goodbye...
I guess I finally made a poem
And no, I won't say I'll die.

I am barely surviving on a thread of superficial interest and the minute that expires I feel like I will too. And the list of my interests is getting shorter and shorter.
The stories
I once liked,
The sites
I once browsed,
The drawings
I once admired,

All slowly

f a d i n g  


f  r  o  m  



t  h  e  



n   a   r   r   o   w  




s    c    o    p    e  




o     f  





m      y  




m       i       n       d       .           .                .                   .

i cant even try
now that you've bled me dry
so i can no longer move on
from everything thats gone

the sharp knife in my hand
to make the final stand
and take away all the pain
that falls in the rain

show the demons that have come
that im ready for my final song
when the words no longer make a rhyme
and stand still this final time

how can you see my fate
when you cant stop your own
cuz its in this final state
that i am left alone

now that i see the light
for the final time
i finally lose my sight
unable to shine

you've left
and all my memories are now fading
fading and fading
as if they are sand castles
remnants of happiness and strength
with the relentless waves clawing
clawing and clawing
until there is nothing left but a blank slate
only there for me to fill up once again