I was broke as usual it's okay I understood that far easier than I ever did being well off.

Long as there was a bottle and a room I could crash in I was good.
I never cared to gamble.
I lived my life that was a gamble enough

My money i preferred to be wasted upon myself not given to a fixed game played by overpaid children.

The only sport I ever loved was fighting.
I understood you against another.
In life its always you against the world.

I loved to fight even when you lose you know you've lived
I had stepped between those ropes often.

Paid the the price for a simple mistake and been knocked flat on my *** for it.
Boxing is a human chess match very few men have what it takes to go toe to toe with another.

Anyone can fall down it takes a man or mental patient to keep getting back up.
I had paid my dues broken bones multiple concussions between that and all the ***** poured into my skull you think I would be braindead by now.

Some would tell you I already was.
And those people would be like most full of **** speaking on things they know nothing about.

Critics come in all forms.
Don't worry over there opinions nobody ever worth a **** sat on the sidelines.

I had nothing to show for my years.
I could barely get moving some days.
But when the drinks hit me right and some young **** called me out i still had that spark that fueled the fire.

Never take **** from.anyone no matter how tuff they seem.
Anyone can get caught anyone can bleed.

Remember kids its not what you can dish out.
Its how much you can take and keep going that makes you tuff.

I wore my scars like tattoo's.
Everyone of them had a story.
I never believed in luck.

I just kept going no matter what stood before me.

If I depended on luck in my life.
I would be up **** creek for the rest of my existence.

Never stay down no matter how easy it seems.

Those old stories you never thought to be true .
****** up fairy tales two busted marriages you do not know me so dont pretend to.understand.

A needle a promise .
A busted nose bloodstains left behind and lies to fill the spaces inbetween.

You can think the reason never knowing the answer theres more to a friendship than a title yeah sweetheart im speaking to you.

Erase my pages but we cannot forget that night .
Alone the **** still stings shadows in candle light give romance to a grand illusion .

Im nothimg outside the page and you just what i made of you.
A romance lasts years and a cancer can linger just the same.

Both will **** you just the same so grow up quick kids and lose the delusions before it blinds your reason.

The thought is all that matters and the page its final resting place .
Goodnight for now.

A parting kiss another one night stand .
Its just a view from my world .
I've paid my dues ten fold.

And i can forget more than most will learn.
It was always there I just had to live to find it.

**** the edge I dove of it years ago

We all find are truths jaded with time .
Words faded sands built up over time and we erase the person so only the legend stands.

Remorse is best kept silent.
Dont ever let them know you.
Or your ****** when it comes to the page.

No matter how hard you try it always bleeds through.

False sense and even more hopless logic.
The meak bleed the dream and the truth exists for the chosen .

Weaknes is a sin and in the darkness he awaits to embrace .
Shunned like you my child why seek exceptance when the cruel torment
And the so called wicked remain silent inspite there action's?

Part of my soul is never anothers to consume i made these steps alone dont give credit to none that have aided your efforts .

Embrace your desires burn in the flames of want and be truthful while others exist within there lies .

The wind holds more truths for it breathes life were hope only lends to help the weak remain.

Never seek acceptance .
The embrace awaits those not blind within heart.

Do not follow and you will never be led astray.
Truth is always the first victim to fear .

Bleed only for your own existance .
I bare no message to the ignorant .
Just a simple slap to the face harder than you may give to me.

Right your own rules before you become a fool for anothers .


Whispers in shadows .

~ Walls of Flesh ~

Life isn't just what is seen in a pretty picture,
But the secrets buried from within the walls of our flesh, and hidden deep inside,
Intellectually we stand tall, body held strong by the back bone of our pride,
While we battle the constant thoughts of the conscious mind,
Unable to see the whole picture because we are blind.

What if we crossed the wrong bridge, or took the wrong street?
Should we prepare ourselves for lies and deceit?
Instead of what makes our heart beat?

Trying to look prettier everyday,
but still perfect in God's eyes,
Inside we still burn with secrets and lies,
Still trying to control in their heart
what lives or dies,
How do you deal with those whose mind has taken over their lives?
Behind the walls of flesh is where they hide.

We don’t have time to let anyone else in,
So our lives are basically pretend,
We hold up a shield that's made of tin.
Some people can't handle the struggle, so their thoughts drive them insane,
But still strong, holding onto the pride while showing no pain.
Then what happens to the one's who are weak and can't stand alone without pride?
Will they just disintegrate and die?
Will the secrets and pain eat them alive?
Our soul is eating it's flesh from within, trying to survive,
Wanting to escape from behind the walls of where they hide.

The pain from our past,
Has forced us to wear a mask.
Deliberating the differences of the
pro's & con's,
The scale tips, unbalanced decisions of right or wrong,
Those who are lost, searching for their place in this world and where they belong.

Life isn't just what is seen in a pretty picture,
But the secrets that burn from behind the walls of our flesh, and hidden deep inside,
Body held up by the back bone of our pride.
So why can't we break down the walls of our flesh and let everyone in?
No matter their differences, no matter their sin?
Because as humans we are afraid of possible hurt,
And that is no reason to treat them like dirt.
To be the person that you were created to be,
Take a chance to just break free,
Convince our soul that its okay to finally breathe.
Reach inside yourself and decide,...
' Inside these walls of flesh,  
I NO LONGER HIDE ! '

Theres always a excuse not to fail.
Lack of spine is what it all comes down.to.
Many build a callus on there *** waiting for something to land in there lap.

Is it fear or comfort that makes one lazy?

I never knew anything easy two broken feet a few broken ribs a busted knuckle or two the scars of effort i wore them with pride.

People are a nice thought far to often gone astray.
There words lend fools comfort.
And keep the bitter moving without regret.

I was alone with my thoughts and what a place i truly embraced being.
Crazy is just a word to keep others away.

Maybe its why i wore it like a badge.
For its the mad ones that intrest me the most.

There is always a reason not to try.
And never a excuse that doesnt reek of ******* and a normal existance.


Saftey is for signs on the walls and guns in bored fools hands.

Avoid that word at all time's and you will be fine.
As you bask in the solace of your own truths and simple plessures.

Theres never a excuse.

They speak in riddles snakes who desire your comfort.
Who bleed the foolish to believe in hopes far to great to be anything more than empty promises

The heat lighting promises a storm soon so very soon they will understand .


The night seemed darkest when embraced by thought.
Silent they slither were wolves simply howl.

I have walked many miles been invisible to others and ran circles around those who never knew a fool can find more luck without trying than some pompous *** with a degree.

The surrounding clocks all kept perfect time the old man always made sure of that.
Why did he care what did it truly matter .
Once he worked in a repair shop the clocks there always were slow .
Time dragged on where now the day was gone far to fast now
time was his and his days were short.

Nobody can cling to anything worth while so leave it empty .
Your heart .
Your thoughts  
Your very soul should remain vacant so none will ever want a single thing from you.

I am empty in all but my own words and I simply give those away before they are erased by time.

We think to much when were young .
Then speak far to less believing we are no longer worth the time.

Three clocks were in the room he died in.
They kept perfect time .

We cast aside what gathers in are way.
People consuming souls speaking hollow truths to half empty minds .
The best is left for last  and me I'm simply somewhere in between.

Madmen preach as the ignorant run the show .
I can tend the fire but no longer can I sit and hold your hand.
The truths a harsh existence I thrive best in solitude than sharing my comforts in a sea of people just as ****** up as myself.

We cannot stand together when we  all think apart.
The lies have turned are minds inward left are eyes jaded to see the threat that exists .

No virtual environment will plague my existence .
As the road ahead forks and we were long since parted so lets not pretend we care for it was in the cards all along.

A walk through the cemetery  as cold winds approach .
We were never here to begin with and your dreams a illusion of the
downside of a bad trip to begin with.

**** what they will think!
For shackles of any kind are for the weak .
And my wounds will bleed till they heal or simply keep
me company till I die .

I shut the door long before you said another word .
This was are goodbye .